Without any further delay, let?s see what the two of you could produce for us! First off, Ammy?s request of "A Cowrie Treasure".
~*Amaterasu?s Request*~
I have come reporting with the Legendary Cowry Treasure. Since Kaguya already had a Cowry treasure even though every guy who participated for her love failed and died, I decided to ask her where she got one. Turns out she had all 5 treasures when she initiated the challenge, she just wanted to see all of those guys to go on a wild goose chase for her own entertainment. She gave me her Cowry Treasure since she doesn't need it anymore.
On my way back, a snail came out of the shell. I thought "That's not right, don't they remove the snail from cowry used for treasure and jewelry?" To my surprise, the snail's slime is acidic. I almost lost my last good pair of shoes. Also don't antagonize it, it breathes fire. A friend of mine mocked it, I soon had to go back to Eientei. So anyway, here you go. Don't forget to feed it.
Ha ha ha! Wow, that's really something. Even if your drawing was crap - and it isn't - the thought and attention you put into the back story really shows. Good work.
Alright, NOW to our next offering ...
Ok, so, you wanted a Kairi Treasure, right? Well, I think she's kinda cute and she really likes her bag, so here
Oh...god...
I'm so sorry! I misread your request! u?...but I'm not sure if I have anything like that...
Well...let's look in her bag.
Hmm...I wonder if...
Oh wow! I just like, got, incredibly lucky! Look what's inside!
After all, isn't the greatest treasure in life...
Life itself?
I hope that satisfies your craving to fulfill the impossible request, Mr. Ammy.
A segue from Kingdom Hearts to marine life, very nicely done! And I certainly appreciate the sentiment about the greatest treasure in life.
You two sure haven't made this easy, and it's a really tough call, but I'm going to have to go with Skye on this one. The story alone edges out.
Having said that, I do have a part-time position open for you, if you're interested. We can talk about it over a six of Schlitz in my basement, with some Frampton Comes Alive. Yay-uh!
*turns the Rungren back up*
Skye - 1, UK - 0. Next is Rou and his request for.. uh.. "Shit that will make us a lot of fucking money".
~*Roukanken?s Request*~
Jeez, this is what kids are like these days? Is it so hard to ask you guys for a goddamn printer?
...Ah, never mind, lessee what you two managed to come up with anyway. Be glad that I need this money real bad.
Okay, first is UncertainKitten, and she sent me this here advert for a...
Tentalestor. Designed to help women accomplish their...rape...fantasies.
...The hell is this? You want me to get a record for promoting sex toys?! I'd understand if this is the kinda thing we sell on the side, but as the first product comin' outta the reset!? That's just how I wanna set myself up, ain't it: 'Here comes Don Kanken, head of the biggest tentacle rape ring in the state!'
Yeah, I'm gonna politely decline on this one. By which I mean I'm gonna strap ya down to one of your own machines and turn it on, promptly after I stick knives into the tentacles. That oughta be a piercing experience for ya, right?
Okay, Skye, you'd better have somethin' better for me. Time is money, chop chop.
I have created a device that we can sell for profit. The Shrine Blessings machine.
This device can be used to replace donation boxes from shrines. With Gensokyo being flooded with incidents nowadays, it's difficult for Shrine Maidens to stay in their shrine and give blessings to those who donate. This machine works by having the Shrine Maiden or the Shrine's God give part of their power, so the machine would give blessings that the Shrine's God would give. You insert donations in the machine and pull the gohei. Your blessing will be determined by the symbols that line up, the more you donate the higher the chance to get a great blessing. The machine is also covered with Amulet Seals to prevent vandalism. Anyone who tries to vandalize or insert something that is not a donation will have their face melted.
Since there aren't that many Shrine Maidens in Gensokyo, you make the machines run on your power. So the owner of the machine has to pay you a certain percentage of their donations for the machine to work.
...Huh.
This...this is actually pretty damn clever.
...Hell, this is ingenious.
We've got the machines set up so to get any sorta decent fortune you gotta throw in your life savings. People are gonna throw their money in begging for help with whatever shit they're doing, and we claim it's under a good cause by playing the religion card! In weeks we're gonna have whole buildings filled with nothing but these machines, sponsored by the Hakurei and Moriya Shrines, and we'll all be freakin' swimmin' in money!
Dammit, Skye. It's really a shame I've seen so little of ya up until now, 'cause I really like your style. Lemme tell ya, with an invention like this you earned that there IM title.
##Vote Sign [Blessing of the Tiger]: SkyeNow if ya don't mind me, I'm gonna go have a little talk with the chick from the Hakurei shrine. Gonna go make her an offer she can't refuse, y'know what I'm sayin'?
Skye - 2, UK - 0. Well then, it looks like the winner of our little challenge has already been made clear.
(Geez UK, you could at least made things a little more suspenseful for my part. :tsoglare: )
*ahem!* Anyway..
~*Nobu's Request*~
It looks like neither of you were able to give me exactly what I had in mind. First, UK's submission.
What is love?
Love makes the world go round Nobu! And my humble offering of this song should be a form fitting for a deity such as yourself!
Let me first make clear that THIS IS NOT JEOPARDY. And while quite fitting for a night at the Roxbury, not so much fitting for a Deity. Anyway, let's take a look at Skye's.
and I think it's worse than what I have given to Roukanken and Amaterasu. A common item that I encounter on a daily basis and is really important, the first thing that came into my mind was toilet paper. I kept trying harder on thinking on something better and that makes more sense. I kept thinking about bathroom stuff, kitchen utensils, and undergarments. This just shows that I'm awful at riddles, so I said "Screw it, I'm going with the toilet paper." I thought making the paper gold wasn't enough to make it fitting for a Deity, so I added a fancy toilet paper holder. I can still make it better, so I also added torches so you get that Royal feeling you get in a castle. To finish it off I added some "thing" with jewels and markings.
So yeah, that's what I got, Royal Toilet Paper. I'll be going now.
....what the hell is this? I'm OBVIOUSLY looking for an esoteric and tricky response and you give me TOILET PAPER?!
Though, on second thought... actually this is pretty sweet! I enjoy your work trying to turn an extremely common item into something fit for a Deity. I very much enjoyed this response. This is being installed in the temple pronto! Now, if only Ruro hadn't stolen the toilet..
Anyway, to refresh your memory, I asked for "something so incredibly common, yet so incredibly important, and you encounter it on a daily basis. However, I?m only interested in it in a form fitting for a Deity. Whether you find it somewhere or craft it yourself is unimportant, as long as you are giving it to me."
I'll give that it was a bit vague, but even in a setting devoid of Love or toilet paper, i'd like to see you try to go a day without
language. And what form is more fitting for a Deity than a
prayer? (which I would recommend UK starts doing if she want to stand up here with the big girls and boys..)
So there you have it! Skye wins with a clean sweep! Break out the song and dance! As a punishment to you UK, you're going to have to do some servi---actually, scratch that. You'd enjoy that too much. I decree that for your punishment, you shall be treated like the Princess you are! That means absolutely no degrading remarks, punishment of any kind, and you get your own servants to pamper you.
However, I know your tricks and ability to turn ANYTHING kinky, so these servants have been bound to a PG-13 geas. If you try to entice them to perform illicit acts, they will
self-destruct turn into Bill O'Reilly. Kink if you dare.
As for you Skye, much praise and glory be upon you! :toot: There should be no question as to whether or not you deserve that title.