Write me an epic poem detailing the Linux penguin and the BSD daemon fighting the evil of Gates and Jobs.
furthermore, this poem must be written in the style of scandanavian epic
you will get points for kenning use and casesoras
Then did the penguin rise at dawn filled he was on sea-sparrows from last eve
He donned his helm and geek-splitter and rode westward to meet the foe he must cleave
Partitioned his disk, he feared nothing afore him adware bandits ignored him, and so safe wast he
When the sky-scorcher soared highest he saw appear on yon horizon, a wee red man
Two horns hast he, and a small barbed tail holding a three-pronged nerd-piercer in hand
He rode to him swiftly and spoke to him thus "Art thou not just, would you die for this land?"
"Aye" said the daemon "for though I am small and few know my name from here to the earth's sill
I have heard of you, penguin, and your noble feats and would ride with you, lending the force of mine will
To defeat Ye Smarmy One, Jobs the Bald-Headed and Ye Great Dreaded Overlord of Darkness, Bill."
"Let us ride then" sayeth the penguin, and ride then they did over earth-tits, across water-serpents, glens and heath
Until they came at last to the valley of silicon the air so thick with neckbeard sweat, it was hard to breathe
"We hath arrived, daemon" sayeth the penguin Sayeth the daemon, "Call me Keith."
When suddenly a rumbling arose from the south and the hideous Jobs rose, drooling, scalp shining
"Think different!" he bellowed, his foul breath flooding and the penguin and Keith wast heavily prespiring
Yet neither pants-soiled and neither stepped back to attack was what the two were conspiring
"Thou fraud!" yelled the penguin, and with his geek-splitter hacked "You who wears the cloak of the hipster, the cool
Are naught but a shadow of thine Father, Bill, from whom thou learned everything, yes, he was your school!
Aye, behold!" sayeth the penguin, his blade held aloft reflecting what oft Jobs ignored as a rule
And yea, when Jobs beheld what he was in the reflection he saw, he shrieked, his fists curled
and fell to the ground, and his brain-gourd split open and from within they did see the contents unfurled
the next generation of a smudgy P.O.S. "What a mess" said the penguin. Sayeth Keith, "I might hurl."
But lo - they did not cheer, nor celebrate long for then the sky darkened, clouds faded away
The moon ran blood-red, stars fell to the ground birds pissed with fear, the earth started to sway
And the penguin and Keith raised their blades to the sun for The Dark One, Bill, was coming their way
Mere words cannot carry how fearsome Bill was the strongest man would sooner eat his own hands
Before even so much as thinking of turning an ant-blink's look at this horror, this thing-not-a-man
And so Bill gripped within his iron claws and razor-jaws the whole of the land.
But the penguin and Keith, did not falter nor quake they dug in their heels, raised their geek-slashers high
They roared with all their might, stamped their legs shook their arms, sent their blood-curses to the sky
And they charged at Bill, with the aim to rend to bring him to an end, they saw his death nigh.
And yet Bill did not see them, knew not they were there He stood there, smiling, as if the penguin and Keith were but mist
Astounded, they yelled louder, but Bill did not hear Their air-daggers hurt him not, he raised nary a fist
The penguin and Keith were left baffled, they could not believe this thing they would cleave didn't know they exist.
Bill sits there still, his throne, growing moss He still owns the land, his power is secure
The penguin and Keith, did not win, but did not die They live on, and though small, their aims are still sure
And each in the valley can chose what hero he will the choice is there still, as long as Bill's blindness endures.