[13:30] <Yumemi-Rurokazaki> @choose Yumemi's Perfect Biology Classroom or nothing
[13:30] <Keine> Yumemi-Rurokazaki: I choose...Yumemi's Perfect Biology Classroom! ^_^V
[13:30] <Yumemi-Rurokazaki> \o/
All right, class, settle down. Your biology teacher, Arashi Kurobara, is out sick today with a bad case of GotKidnappedByRuroAndTiedUpInHerCloset-itis, and there are no other bio teachers around here, so Principal TSO called me in to be your substitute today. Hold on while I take attendance.
Oh, question, Mr. Kilga? No, we are not doing human health and reproduction anymore, so you can stop trying to memorize the mammary diagram on page 343. It's not on the test, so you don't need to know it. Donut, stop eating in the back of my cla-- actually, you know, I know a really good way to make dough taste like chocolate. Just dip that croissant into that container of glowing green liquid and take a bite... hahahahaha, yessss. Solais, do you mind taking Donut to the nurse's office where Doc Purvis can give him treat-- what do you mean, he's not breathing? Oh well. No, it doesn't count as a human sacrifice on the altar of glorious Sanae-sama, Solais. Erebus, do be a dear and drag Donut to the morgue, please. 'nako, please stop desecrating Donut's corpse by drawing on his face in magic marker. Eh, I guess it's all right, he doesn't care.
Hele, stop writing about Remilia. She is a terrible character. Oh, Gpop, you're writing too? Well, it's Koishi, so I can dig it. Xan, Kerigis, Anthony, do stop fawning over Theorin. Man, it is really appalling to see how little Arashi-san enforces the rules in this classroom. Slaves, A-F, Gappy, what's that you've got over there? Oh, a group picture of the Ijiyatsu cast? Please put it away. We're in a laboratory, some chemicals could spill on it. Thank you. Serp! Don't grab that vial, it's very--! ... oh dear. Can we get a janitor in here to clean up that glowing red stain on the floor? Ah, thank you, Matsuri and Nobu. I would have asked Vic, but he's Professor Mint's teaching assistant this semester. UK, are you done cleaning Serp up yet? Do you really need to be so thorou-- AGAIN, we are not studying human health and reproduction anymore. Please take your seat. Thank you.
Oh, a visitor? No, Sana, this isn't the geography class. I think you're lost. Sapz, would you mind escorting Sana to Prof. Gappy's class? No, she doesn't teach geography either, but who cares, just get out of my classroom. Dusty, please change out of those oily overalls, you never know when one of the bunsen burners will tu-- oh dear. Roukan, see that bucket of water? Yes, you've got the idea. Dusty, please go to the main office. Mode will get you some new clothes. Chaore, Paul, please put the Pokemon games away. Stop distracting Cadmas, he's trying to read. Hm? What is it, Drake? Oh, you've got a permission slip for Prof. Forza? Sure, go ahead and turn that in, he's right next door in the languages class.
If I didn't call your name, please raise your hands... Suikama, Naut, I didn't know you were in this class. I thought you were always working with Prof. Stuffman in the garage? Oh well. Hey, Jana. Nice to see that you've shown up. No, don't worry, you're not late. Take your seat by Xan there. Choja, you're a bit new to this class, aren't you? This is our first test. Banana, mind getting him a calculator? Thanks. I think that's most of you guys, then. Sakana, would you mind taking today's attendance sheet to the main office? Thank you. All right, let's get started on today's lecture.
Today we are going to be talking about the immune system. Nonspecific immunity, also known as innate immunity. The immune system's first line of defense against an invading antigen is the skin, of course. However, if an antigen gets into the body, then the backbone of the vertebrate immune system swings into play.
There are several different types of cells in vertebrates that play key roles in nonspecific immunity. They are also found in all classes of animals and some birds. No, I don't know if you have phagocytes, Ammy. Ask Doctor Purvis when you see him later. Many of these cells are phagocytes-- cells that are capable of phagocytosis, which is a form of endocytosis in which the cell engulfs particulate matter, which usually is then destroyed by various proteases or oxidizing agents such as hydrogen peroxide. No, Sodium, I wasn't calling on you. Moving on...
Phagocytes are found in the bodily fluids, such as hemolymph and blood, and also in various tissues and organs. In vertebrates, most phagocytes are commonly known as white blood cells, leukocytes. These are all derived from a common type of stem cell, which in mammals and birds, is found in the bone marrow. There are many types, but these are the ones we are going to cover: Neutrophils, eosinophils, monocytes, macrophages, and basophils.
Neutrophils are the most common type of leukocyte. They are found inside the blood and assorted tissues throughout the body. They engulf bacteria through endocytosis, and the bacteria are destroyed within endocycotic vacuoles by proteases, oxidizing agents, and assorted defensins. In short, they eat bacteria. Eosinophils are phagocytes found in the respiratory, urinary, and gastrointestinal tracts, within mucosal surfaces. Monocytes are phagocytes that circulate through the blood for a few days, then take up permanent residence as macrophages in virtually all tissues and organs. They are also located in the skin and the linings of the respiratory and digestive tracts, where they engulf viruses and bacteria. And lastly, basophils are part of a class of phagocytes in their own right. They don't actually engulf bacteria. They secrete heparin, an anticlotting blood factor, at the site of an infection. They also secrete histamine, which draws infection-fighting cells and proteins to the site of the infection.
What do you mean, I wasn't supposed to
actually teach a worthwhile lesson? Hmph! I'm going to have to have some words with Arashi when I get home. Er, when she gets better. Anyway, Sakana, would you mind helping me pass these out? This is the test Arashi had for you guys today. It is worth half your grade and it only has one question. Does everyone have one? Good. Okay, let me turn on this overhead projector and show you the diagram...
Use the following diagram and your prior knowledge to choose the best answer.A. This is a diagram of Sikieikle-cell disease, which is a genetic condition caused by a point mutation to the hellmoeglobin protein which causes red blood cells to become Siki-like in appearance and behavior.
B. It is a Camus-esque depiction of the hopeless futility of life.
C. It is a highly accurate description of the true plot of PoFV, wherein Medicine contaminates Gensokyo's water supply and Shikieiki is shown to be the true heroine of the Windows series when she shrinks down to molecular size and uses danmaku bubbles to destroy every last particle of poison.
D. Eirin wanted to study Eiki's Lawful Lawful nature, and asked for a blood sample. That's actually a Yamathrocyte under the microscope, secreting enough lawfulness to turn a bacterial colony into a civilization.
You have five minutes to complete the test. Good luck!