Author Topic: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!  (Read 44386 times)

Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #270 on: August 24, 2009, 01:55:32 AM »
Okay. That'll work. I'll just need to figure out how to get this thing dislodged eventually. Unless I can find a way to absorb it into my body and gain the ability to have CHAINSAW LIMBS. Then I think I'd be getting somewhere.

In any case, thanks.

Take an extra long shower tonight, it should wash right out. Have a band-aid and an extra towel ready for afterwards. I'll append this to your bill.

Let me count...
Getter Rays... Spiral Energy... A G-Stone... and BOMBER!

I regret to inform you that you have cancer. I am setting you up an appointment with an oncologist. I'll append this this to you bill.

I'm paying too much on my medical bills. What do I do?

Rob a health insurance CEO.

Helepolis

  • Charisma!
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  • O-ojousama!?
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #271 on: August 24, 2009, 07:02:35 AM »
Doctor, I'll repeat my question: Whenever I see Enma-sama, my heart starts beating like crazy and I feel all warm and dizzy.

Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #272 on: August 24, 2009, 07:07:01 AM »
Doctor, I'll repeat my question: Whenever I see Enma-sama, my heart starts beating like crazy and I feel all warm and dizzy.

You have an allergy the Sanzu River. Try to achieve enlightenment so that you can avoid it. I'll send you your bill.

Your Horoscope is: RULE # 7 : Equation for FORCE FIELD(S) < greatest military equation for both military & non-military applications > for ARTIFICIAL phenomenon(s), such as a nuclear blast, where C3 = @ DPfor TL, for its diameter in millimeters= 10^[C3^(1/3)] =10^[C3^.333] = 10^[C3^(1/r)], where r = LOG10(D), where D = radius in meters, where the just mentioned equation can be used to calculate the CORE temperature of nuclear reaction(s), where you can use the Soul Equation to figure out the number of workers needed for a project like the Manhattan Project, but use the exponent of (1/4) for matter-antimatter reaction(s) on @ C3 @ DP or default psyche, and (1/5) if C3 @ PL. The variable K or exponent for the natural force field equation = [5 + L], where L = (C2 / 400), where L = e = [(C2 DP) / 100)^(1/2)], where @ 400 C2 DP, e = 2, and where C2 = DP or default psyche, where r = [ K / 2 ] = 3 if K = 6. But, the force field for NATURAL phenomenon(s) for its diameter in millimeters = 10^[C3^(1/K)] = 10^[C3^(1/6)] for Mars, where C3 = DP or default psyche : you can apply this latter equation for the planetoid equation to figure out it?s diameter ; using the former equation for an artificial phenomenon, you have to artificially boost it?s life-span by decreasing its PL or power level, which you can apply to appropriately. Use RULE # 47 to check for accuracy. These 2 force-field equations hold & give shape to most of the rules in my (this) rpg HYBRID. You can, also, figure out Nd6 damage by a nuclear blast or attack. If C3 = PL rather than DP, then add the modifier +1 to the denominator of the exponent, meaning the exponent (1/3) should be change to (1/4)if C3 is @PL orPower Level < greatestmilitary equation : can be used to create all sorts of missiles, from bullets to nuclear warheads >.Look @ RULE # 8,# 48, & # 110.

dustyjo

Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #273 on: August 24, 2009, 07:40:36 AM »
Doc, will I ever find teh loev?

Pako

  • Forum pessimist, chatbox optimist
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #274 on: August 24, 2009, 07:42:07 AM »
NINEBALL TACOS FOR SALE, NOW TEMPORARILY WITH ETCH'S MEAT, ONLY 9 YEN.

You want this doctor?

This shameful piece of shit was made by a certain Anonymous-Fairy, but is now deleted- bawwwww.

Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #275 on: August 24, 2009, 07:53:37 AM »
Doc, will I ever find teh loev?

Do a seach at Gaia. I am certain someone there will have used that particular spelling. I'll send you your bill.

Your horoscope is: RULE # 197 : A new COM equation for guys, where COM =[((C2/10)+1)^2]. So, a guy @ 20 C2 would be @ 9 COM which is slightly different from earlier estimate of [C3/(pi + 1))]. But @ 30 C2,his COM = 16 with this NEW equation which is more compact, in that it has a closer correlation with & to C1 used to calculate COM for ladies (human), where COM for ladies = [(C1/10)^2], where C1 is @ DP. And, COM for human female clone is @ [(C2/10) ? R2], where R2 = 2, and C2 is @ PL. There are 3 racial packages: R1, R2, & R3. R3 for Caucasian; R2 for black African or black African American, including very small minority of Orientals; and R1 for South-Asian, Middle-Eastern, & majority of East-Asians males below border of Russia. But, these 3 racial packages < R1, R2, & R3 > sometimes overlap, meaning sometimes a Caucasian can be @ R2 {or even R1} rather than @ R3, and sometimes < but rarely > a South-Asian or Middle-Eastern can be @ R2 rather than @ R1, and sometimes R2 can be @ R1. But, for fictional characters like DC LOBO, his racial package would be @ R4 or higher, but minimum @ R4, but he can easily be greater than @ R4, but minimum of R4. But, the MU character Tombstone would be @ R3, between R2.72 & R3.14.

You want this doctor?

I'll pass. I just ate a small loaf of bread.

Dragoshi

  • Some sort of lurking trainwreck
  • May or may not exist. Possibly. Maybe.
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #276 on: August 24, 2009, 07:57:58 AM »
Okay. I managed to dislodge the chainsaw. Though I now have a bigger problem.

...I need something to patch up the hole in my back with. Preferrably something that won't have me continue sitting on a stool. That, and things are randomly glitching like crazy around me for no reason.
All shall be well and all shall be well and all manner of things shall be well.

Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #277 on: August 24, 2009, 08:04:35 AM »
Okay. I managed to dislodge the chainsaw. Though I now have a bigger problem.

...I need something to patch up the hole in my back with. Preferrably something that won't have me continue sitting on a stool. That, and things are randomly glitching like crazy around me for no reason.

For this you will need a good friend, a rivet gun, and a sheet of scrap metal. Preferably with no sharp edges on it.

Pako

  • Forum pessimist, chatbox optimist
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #278 on: August 24, 2009, 08:08:09 AM »
Is participating in "Return to the Barren Path" healthy?

This shameful piece of shit was made by a certain Anonymous-Fairy, but is now deleted- bawwwww.

Dragoshi

  • Some sort of lurking trainwreck
  • May or may not exist. Possibly. Maybe.
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #279 on: August 24, 2009, 08:08:31 AM »
Will this also solve the glitching or will I need something else entirely for that kind of thing?

'Cause it- ??i????dd?g??F?e?A3Lx?A\?G?Lp???(D???????k??f??8t?'???ZxH??(@??N?T?r???t?_?g5?`?A?x1???? ?p?e???j!??????????????^i??6v???????u?Uq???*????i???D??[2q?????H0?_

...yeah. That's pretty much why. It's ludicrously disruptive. :x Though I am absolutely sure that I can get all that stuff in order to patch myself up, at least.
All shall be well and all shall be well and all manner of things shall be well.

Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #280 on: August 24, 2009, 08:18:39 AM »
Is participating in "Return to the Barren Path" healthy?

Look at your actions, and tell me. I'll append this to your bill.

Will this also solve the glitching or will I need something else entirely for that kind of thing?

'Cause it- ??i????dd?g??F?e?A3Lx?A\?G?Lp???(D???????k??f??8t?'???ZxH??(@??N?T?r???t?_?g5?`?A?x1???? ?p?e???j!??????????????^i??6v???????u?Uq???*????i???D??[2q?????H0?_

...yeah. That's pretty much why. It's ludicrously disruptive. :x Though I am absolutely sure that I can get all that stuff in order to patch myself up, at least.

Have you been abusing a machine spirit?

Dragoshi

  • Some sort of lurking trainwreck
  • May or may not exist. Possibly. Maybe.
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #281 on: August 24, 2009, 08:21:54 AM »
Not really, no. That's not really my kind o' thing.
All shall be well and all shall be well and all manner of things shall be well.

Pako

  • Forum pessimist, chatbox optimist
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #282 on: August 24, 2009, 08:24:10 AM »
Is participating in "Return to the Barren Path" healthy?

Look at your actions, and tell me. I'll append this to your bill.

My answer is yes.
Thanks to me and Pesco the story is interesting.

This shameful piece of shit was made by a certain Anonymous-Fairy, but is now deleted- bawwwww.

Apotheosis

  • Pop-tarts please!!!
  • MOM WHERE'S MY POP-TARTS?????
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #283 on: August 24, 2009, 09:47:55 AM »
ohhhhhhh fuck I've been shot
The ink of the scholar is more sacred than the blood of the martyr - Mohammed

Tengukami

  • Breaking news. Any season.
  • *
  • I said, with a posed look.
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #284 on: August 24, 2009, 09:52:03 AM »
It hurts whenever I take a deep breath, if I'm jamming a toothpick under my fingernail.

"Human history and growth are both linked closely to strife. Without conflict, humanity would have no impetus for growth. When humans are satisfied with their present condition, they may as well give up on life."

dustyjo

Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #285 on: August 24, 2009, 03:52:44 PM »
What do I do about my love for cat ears and other non human attributes on girls?

DO I START SOME GENETIC EXPERIMENTS

Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #286 on: August 24, 2009, 11:29:27 PM »
Not really, no. That's not really my kind o' thing.

Hmmm. Have you devoured any hard drives lately?

My answer is yes.
Thanks to me and Pesco the story is interesting.

You're leaving out a whole lotta names, humboi. I'll append this to your bill.

ohhhhhhh fuck I've been shot

Let's start with some preventative measures. First, stop getting shot at. This is perhaps the most important step.

It hurts whenever I take a deep breath, if I'm jamming a toothpick under my fingernail.

Are you saying to me that your breathing apparati are under your fingernails?

What do I do about my love for cat ears and other non human attributes on girls?

DO I START SOME GENETIC EXPERIMENTS





Take two and call me in the morning. I'll send you my bill.


« Last Edit: August 24, 2009, 11:42:30 PM by Dr. Purjewry M.F.D. »

Dragoshi

  • Some sort of lurking trainwreck
  • May or may not exist. Possibly. Maybe.
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #287 on: August 24, 2009, 11:36:20 PM »
...Oh yeeeaaaaaahhhh. I actually did do that a couple days back.
All shall be well and all shall be well and all manner of things shall be well.

Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #288 on: August 24, 2009, 11:43:50 PM »
...Oh yeeeaaaaaahhhh. I actually did do that a couple days back.


Run some antivirus scans. Consider devouring an OS reinstallation if the problem persists. I'll append this to your bill.

dustyjo

Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #289 on: August 25, 2009, 12:46:04 AM »
I take it you don't like me, doc.

Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #290 on: August 25, 2009, 12:57:15 AM »
I take it you don't like me, doc.

I was merely trying to help you solve your problem.

Nachtwanderlied

Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #291 on: August 25, 2009, 01:15:29 AM »
I'm a bloodthirsty mass murderer who serves unspeakable ancient horrors.

How can I get better at that?

Rikter

  • VVVVVVVVVVVVVVV
  • AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #292 on: August 25, 2009, 01:59:27 AM »
I'm losing my train of tought very frequently these days. Got anything to help me with that?

Slaves

  • uHHH,
  • *
  • uHHHHHHHHHH,,,
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #293 on: August 25, 2009, 02:03:19 AM »
I'M LOSING MY BALANCE

EDIT: i just fell

Fetch()tirade

  • serial time-waster
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #294 on: August 25, 2009, 02:31:26 AM »
I'M LOSING MY BALANCE

EDIT: i just fell

Have you fallen and you can't get up?

Gpop

Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #295 on: August 25, 2009, 02:58:09 AM »
Uhh...what should I do with this excess amount of semen that I just released from reading LittleShrimp's comics?

E-Nazrin

  • .... what're you looking at?
  • fuwafuwa pachipachi
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #296 on: August 25, 2009, 03:01:37 AM »
Mop.
There was something here once. Wonder what...

Apotheosis

  • Pop-tarts please!!!
  • MOM WHERE'S MY POP-TARTS?????
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #297 on: August 25, 2009, 03:15:10 AM »
Let's start with some preventative measures. First, stop getting shot at. This is perhaps the most important step.

What if I can't don't want to?
« Last Edit: August 25, 2009, 03:45:08 AM by BaitySM »
The ink of the scholar is more sacred than the blood of the martyr - Mohammed

Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #298 on: August 25, 2009, 04:31:38 AM »
I'm a bloodthirsty mass murderer who serves unspeakable ancient horrors.

How can I get better at that?

That is not exactly a health or wellness problem, is it? But if you wish to improve, my advice would be to consult those whose techniques you admire, and try to learn from them. Synthesize them into your own personal style. Do be prepared to have to defeat them, first. Also, you will have to choose whether you give into the unspeakable powers or not. Doing so too strongly would cut into your efficacy, so do be sure to strike a good balance. I'll send you my bill.

I'm losing my train of tought very frequently these days. Got anything to help me with that?

Put out a want at for an engineer. Hopefully you'll be able to attract someone from Conrail or Union Pacific to help you out. It may be a good idea of hire a couple of railyard bulls if you think the problem may be hobo-related.

I'M LOSING MY BALANCE

EDIT: i just fell

This is a natural side effect of personal gravity difficulties. Repeat the test and see if there is any improvement.

Uhh...what should I do with this excess amount of semen that I just released from reading LittleShrimp's comics?

Do you have access to a candlemaking kit?

Mop.
CALDONIA!

What if I can't don't want to?

Then you are going to have a problem with relapses. Really, I must insist you follow that direcetion.

Easy Mode

Re: Dr Purvis' Mobile Clinic is in town!
« Reply #299 on: August 25, 2009, 04:53:47 AM »
Why do generic poptarts taste like heartburn?