Author Topic: What If... v 5.0 (Read 190241 times)

game2011 · « **Reply #810 on:** February 21, 2016, 01:40:59 PM »

Momiji and Kagerou run over to eat all the bones he fires. Great, now I'm corrupted by the fandom into thinking those two are dogs...

What if Letty suddenly shows up before you, riding on a rhinoceros that is wearing roller skates, and tells you to hop on fast, as there is no time to explain? Also, the rhinoceros is pulling a wooden cart carrying a skeleton wearing Koishi's clothes.

Hannibal_Kills · « **Reply #811 on:** February 21, 2016, 02:52:24 PM »

"Can't you just cool down a bit, please?"
*Gets Winter'd for pun. Rides up the Rhino.
"Also, what the hell is Koishi doing back there? Is she stoned or something?"
*Gets unconsciously raped for pun.

What if Touhou-fans thought they were buying train tickets to Gensokyo and rode the train, and arrived at GULAG?

game2011 · « **Reply #812 on:** February 21, 2016, 02:58:26 PM »

Don't worry; almost everyone there is female. It's nothing more than a Russian Gensokyo.

What if ZUN gave Wakasagihime normal legs and a fish tail and still tried to pass her off as a mermaid?

Chirumiru-chan · « **Reply #813 on:** February 21, 2016, 03:57:28 PM »

Quote from: game2011 on February 21, 2016, 02:58:26 PM

Don't worry; almost everyone there is female. It's nothing more than a Russian Gensokyo.

What if ZUN gave Wakasagihime normal legs and a fish tail and still tried to pass her off as a mermaid?

Then ZUN is weiiiiird

What if Flowey showed up in Gensokyo?

andykhang · « **Reply #814 on:** February 22, 2016, 04:01:01 PM »

Quote from: Chirumiru-chan on February 21, 2016, 03:57:28 PM

What if Flowey showed up in Gensokyo?

this: http://danbooru.donmai.us/posts/2160445?tags=touhou+undertale

What if Chara appear in Gensokyo instead?

snowflake247 · « **Reply #815 on:** February 23, 2016, 12:06:10 AM »

He wouldn't have anywhere to practice his hockey, so Letty and Cirno would have to freeze Misty Lake to make a makeshift rink. There probably aren't many people in Gensokyo familiar with the NHL, so people would be a bit confused about what's going on.
(I'm talking about this guy, not the Undertale one.)

What if Yukari took Ran, Chen, and Reimu on vacation to a tropical island?

PK · « **Reply #816 on:** February 23, 2016, 12:22:37 AM »

Reimu would ask to stay there forever: no more incidents and stress, only fun and pineapple juice!

What if Junko formed the "anti-frog alliance"?

Hannibal_Kills · « **Reply #817 on:** February 23, 2016, 10:58:09 AM »

Quote from: PK on February 23, 2016, 12:22:37 AM

What if Junko formed the "anti-frog alliance"?

Cirno is her allies. And Suwako is gonna have a grand battle against them alliance.

~~What if Allies launched Operation Downfall and during that, a whole convoy made out of tanks and APCs and troops stumbled into... youknowwhatimean.~~ What if Bad Luck Brian meets Hina?

Abraham Lincoln · « **Reply #818 on:** February 24, 2016, 08:52:32 AM »

STARTS TOUHOU GAME

[Hina face]

LOSES A LIFE IN STAGE ONE

What if Touhou x Neko Atsume?

Hope ♦ Metal · « **Reply #819 on:** February 25, 2016, 05:31:44 PM »

Quote from: Abraham Lincoln on February 24, 2016, 08:52:32 AM

What if Touhou x Neko Atsume?

It would be about attracting 2hus to your house by placing items around. (makes me feel like attempting to make something similar, but not having actually played Neko Atusme could make it more difficult)

What if Kanako and Satori opened a tanning salon in the Underground?

Spotty Len · « **Reply #820 on:** February 25, 2016, 06:05:07 PM »

It would be powered by Okuu and everybody would get toasted.

What if Yuugi challenged Suika to a drinking contest?

PK · « **Reply #821 on:** February 25, 2016, 06:40:32 PM »

I pity those poor sake worms, they'd be exausted after that :V

What if every character is actually just Mamizou and her friends all the time, playing a massive role-playing game?

HalfGrand · « **Reply #822 on:** February 25, 2016, 06:55:14 PM »

Quote

What if every character is actually just Mamizou and her friends all the time, playing a massive role-playing game?

Woah, simulation theory in my Touhou?

I would imagine Marisa bake-danuki would one day barge into Alice bake-danuki's house shouting "Alice! I've come to play!" and she would catch Alice bake-danuki changed out of her human form. She would quickly say to Alice "quick Alice, get back into costume before the Hakurei mod shows up!".

What if... Hideo Kojima was handed the reins by ZUN to make touhou 16? Remember that since he formed his new studio, Kojima Productions, the Metal Gear part of his life is finished. So yes... no Metal Gear jokes are allowed!

Hannibal_Kills · « **Reply #823 on:** February 25, 2016, 11:21:20 PM »

Then the next game would be more 'manly' than before/usual.

What if the island of Sodor was like Gensokyo, hidden. And it's trains were actually train-youkai's.

Failure McFailFace · « **Reply #824 on:** February 26, 2016, 04:38:06 AM »

Quote from: Hannibal_Kills on February 25, 2016, 11:21:20 PM

Then the next game would be more 'manly' than before/usual.

What if the island of Sodor was like Gensokyo, hidden. And it's trains were actually train-youkai's.

So you're saying that the Vicarstown Drawbridge is a freaking magical portal? Okay. It explains how the engines never get hurt (much) from all those accidents.

What if Touhou 16 had Mima as a secret extra stage boss?

Hannibal_Kills · « **Reply #825 on:** February 26, 2016, 05:24:01 AM »

Quote from: Failure McFailFace on February 26, 2016, 04:38:06 AM

So you're saying that the Vicarstown Drawbridge is a freaking magical portal?

Forgot to say that, damn.

If Mima was the Touhou 16 extra boss, Touhou-fans would be really happy to see her, IF ZUN doesn't reboot her.

What if the word 'damn' is really, a short name for 'danmaku'?

PK · « **Reply #826 on:** February 26, 2016, 02:03:53 PM »

Then every time you say "DAMN you!" to someone, you are actually challenging them to a battle. Not sure if want.

What if Momiji could see a thousand years ahead?

Hannibal_Kills · « **Reply #827 on:** February 27, 2016, 12:12:50 AM »

She would then be 'Momiji the Cowardly Dog', traumatized at what will happen in the next one thousand years. Hell, Yukari might ask her anything related to future Gensokyo.

What if everyone in Gensokyo is being a hypocrite?

HalfGrand · « **Reply #828 on:** February 27, 2016, 05:04:31 AM »

Quote

What if everyone in Gensokyo is being a hypocrite?

I guess then not much would change around Gensokyo then. I mean, we have a buddist that fights, a theif that claims she's only a merchant and a Miko that is serious about her job but doesn't exterminate every youkai she sees. Isn't every Touhou a hypocrite in some way?... Summon Eiki!

What if... Marisa really did get a boatload of treasure at the end of UFO?

the old guy · « **Reply #829 on:** February 27, 2016, 06:51:48 AM »

Then she would buy the SDM from the Scarlets!

What if Marisa was canonically in love with Alice?

Hannibal_Kills · « **Reply #830 on:** February 27, 2016, 10:44:27 AM »

Quote from: the old guy on February 27, 2016, 06:51:48 AM

What if Marisa was canonically in love with Alice?

Then there's no more arguments about who shall be Marisa's couple between everyone in Gensokyo.

What if Reimu still rides on Genji?

Boomer · « **Reply #831 on:** February 27, 2016, 12:41:53 PM »

Does Genji even still live at the Hakurei Shrine? I don't know, it may make for a better partnership than if Reimu were with Marisa (not enough Touhou knowledge to give a good answer really).

What if Meiling was more diligent and productive than Sakuya (I mean, as diligent and productive as a guard can get)?

PK · « **Reply #832 on:** February 27, 2016, 01:44:56 PM »

Less sleeping China jokes, but also no manga reading or siestas, meaning no Hisoutensoku story for her since it was a dream.

What if all the "what if" questions were true?

Boomer · « **Reply #833 on:** February 27, 2016, 03:32:51 PM »

Seeing as this is the 28th page of the 5th thread, we may as well have just re-written Touhou as a whole.

What if Yukari actually tried in a fight?

HalfGrand · « **Reply #834 on:** February 27, 2016, 04:36:37 PM »

Quote

What if Yukari actually tried in a fight?

Well, since her power is that of being one of the most powerful in Gensokyo, but still not powerful enough to face the Watatsuki's in a fair fight, I would say her true power might be something like stage 4 or 5 in LoLK. Luckily though since it's Gensokyo rules you don't have to "no-miss" everything she throws at you... just an educated guess.

What if... one of the human Touhou's got pregnant from one of the generic human villager males one night? You know how these things go. Everybody had a bit too much booze at a flower viewing party, attraction was in the air, some fooling around happened, one thing lead to another and bam! You can't risk fighting danmaku battles anymore because of your baby bump! :derp:

Hope ♦ Metal · « **Reply #835 on:** February 27, 2016, 05:37:09 PM »

Reimu would ~~forcibly~~ train the baby to be a youkai exterminator.

What if there was a 2hu dressed in something suspiciously similar to Clothes That Kill Virgins?

Boomer · « **Reply #836 on:** February 27, 2016, 06:47:35 PM »

From what I have seen, it's not much different than how Reisen is dressed.

What if Patchouli had perfect health?

PK · « **Reply #837 on:** February 27, 2016, 11:59:24 PM »

She'd be in EX mode all the time.

What if Medicine was a usable item in ISC?

Shadowlupus · « **Reply #838 on:** February 28, 2016, 07:30:01 AM »

She would rebel and poison/slow down your character instead of your enemy.

What if each of the Touhou characters (except the male ones) have a boyfriend?

LawfulInsane · « **Reply #839 on:** February 28, 2016, 07:52:43 AM »

Quote from: Kageshirou on February 28, 2016, 07:30:01 AM

She would rebel and poison/slow down your character instead of your enemy.

What if each of the Touhou characters (except the male ones) have a boyfriend?

Then Suika is somehow in denial of it for some reason (EVERYONE IS GAY IN GENSOKYO) (can't remember the source).

~~Also where does this leave Shingyoku~~

What if the Bermunda Triangle was caused by Yukari?