Author Topic: [Orig.] Lucy Summers  (Read 4651 times)

チソウ タイゼン

  • tarzan cheetos
  • you'll thank me for the cropping later
[Orig.] Lucy Summers
« on: December 04, 2011, 08:35:29 AM »
This was an experiment in the narration.

1935

The news shocked everyone.
It had been a long time since anyone had dared make the journey up the moor and to Mrs. Lucy Summer's house.
Her house, dated as it was, was a large and unkempt home, with cracking windows and dusty furniture and antiques. She had, as it transpired, decided to neglect her duties around the house for the past few years of her life. The floors creaked and spiderwebs ran amok within every corner and crevasse. She paid it no mind, and insisted that she preferred it that way.
Nevertheless, her visitors came less and less often, and, in time, stopped coming completely.
It wasn't very long into her solitude that she silently passed away in her sleep, at the age of sixty-three.
Her body lay undiscovered for what the coroner estimated to be a few days.
Her funeral was a brief, silent one, and the town continued on with their lives.
The house in which she had lived continued to sit in those uplands, where it appeared to sway in the breeze, somewhat.

1927
Mrs. Summers' guests walked out the door after they bade her farewell.

These guests were merely some old friends who had gotten worried, for Lucy's sake.
Lucy casually brushed off their flattery and kindness, and then treated them all to dinner.
Their conversation was more of the same.
Welfare, finance, luck, leisure. Lucy smiled as she conversed with them.

"And what of William?" One of the guests asks, a woman, perhaps in her forties. "Do you know what's become of him?"
Lucy put down her drink and shook her head.
"No... I'm afraid we no longer keep contact."
She stared down at her plate.
"Oh!" The woman became flustered. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean-"
"No," Lucy interrupted. "Of course you didn't."
She looked up. "How is the meal?"
A man at the far end of the table quickly answered with his approval.
"Good," Lucy said.

Now, it was quite commonly known that despite how dreary her house became, Mrs. Summers was really the relatable and charitable person. She didn't seem to enjoy discussion about her husband, however.
As soon as the men and the woman finished eating, Mrs. Summers was quick to make an attempt at driving away her intruders.

1925

"William?"
"Wiiiilliaaam?"
Lucy opened her front door. She looked tired and had bags under her eyes.
There was a young, beautiful, brunette woman standing in the doorway. Her name was--
"Hello. I'm Christine Watson."
Christine extended a gloved hand.
"I know who you are," Lucy said.
Watson lowered her hand. "Um, well..."
"How may I be of service to you?"
"I've come looking for William Summers, ma'am. I wish to speak to him."
"You mean, my husband? I am sorry, but he is not here. He and I are divorced."
Christine made a face that she thought looked of shock.
"Oh, no! I am so sorry to hear that!"
"Yes, he left me here to live alone."
Christine tried desperately to change the topic.
"Do you know how I might get to him?"
Lucy hesitated.
"No."
And, without warning, Mrs. Summers shut her large ebony door with a magnificent swoosh, leaving Christine Watson outside in the cold November air.
Watson thought her behavior queer, but she was too mentally occupied to dwell on it, and left to pursue William Summers.

1923

Lucy woke up one day and discovered that the world was radically different.
Her nightmares began to subside and she started to feel more at home within her home.
She whistled calmly, as she strode around her rooms and hallways, removing completely the torn posters on the walls that advertised several plays that she never saw.
She happily dumped the scraps into the refuse bin, and smiled as she set it alight and watched it burn.

1918

"Lucy?"
The sound of that voice immediately caught Lucy Summer's attention. He was back.
"William!"
She ran from the kitchen to embrace her husband.
William backed off, slightly.
"Is... is something the matter?"
Mr. Summers studied the posters on the wall.
"Listen... I wanted this to be the first thing I told you when I got back..."
Lucy's mouth flew agape, but she caught herself.
"Honey?" She eked out.
"While I was on tour..."

It didn't take any longer than three minutes for Mr. Summers to discuss his plans with his wife. They stood in the kitchen, speechless, for too long.

"Listen, Lucy, I'm sorry. I can only hope that you understand where I'm coming from."

Lucy Summers sat in a state of catatonia.
Slowly, she began to develop an emotion.
It wasn't one of sadness, or shock.

"Please, I'm sorry. I have fallen in love with someone else."

It was then that Lucy Summers grabbed the heavy, steel frying pan on the counter to her side, and brought it down upon him.

1917

William Summers was preparing for his role on the stage. He played a major character, that assisted the protagonist on his journey. His character was a charming one, that caught the eyes of many female audience members, who would swoon over him.
And he would not pay any of it mind- until one day, when a young woman, perhaps nineteen, waved her gloved hands at him, and caught his eye.
His troupe was not scheduled to end their tour for about another five months, so he convinced the other members to allow her to travel with them, for a little.

1910
Grace, the last of the Summers' cows, was growing old. She failed to produce a sufficient quantity of milk for the week.
Lucy sighed and brought the bucket inside.
William came home shortly after, and brought with him a large, rolled-up paper.
It was an advertisement for the theater.
"I got a new job!" He exclaimed triumphantly.
"Oh, you did? I am so proud of you!"
"I'll be an actor on the stage for a local theater troupe that takes their plays around the United States," William said.
He looked at his unfurnished, barren house.
"The pay is excellent," he added.
Lucy lit up.
"I will be spending long periods of several months away from home at a time, however."
William hung up the poster.
"I want you to stay strong while I'm gone." He turned and smiled.
"So you'll think of me while I'm away, I'm going to bring back a poster for every play I perform in. Sound good?"
Lucy couldn't help but feel a sting from the thought of him being gone for so long. But she smiled, and nodded.
"Yes."
They kissed.
"I love you."
"And I love you."
William Summers turned, walked out of the door, and waved good-bye.

1900

Lucy Gregorson looked at herself in the mirror.
She was positively resplendent in her bridal gown.

She and William Summers were married on a cool March afternoon.
Lucy turned to her new husband.
"Hey, about our vows?"
"Huh?"
"About how we promised to be together forever, you know."
"Oh, right?" William chuckled.
"Do you truly think that?"
"That we will be together, into eternity?"
"Yeah."
William smiled.
"Of course I do. Forever."
Lucy smiled back.
"Forever and ever?"
"Forever and ever."


Re: [Orig.] Lucy Summers
« Reply #1 on: December 04, 2011, 09:36:31 AM »
Dawwwww, what a nice, happy ending~
The backwards time progression was good, and I ended up reading it from the end to the beginning to see if I missed anything.
It was a nice, quick and refreshing read~
Hard 1ccs
Completed: IN, MoF, SA, DDC, LoLK, HSiFS

Extra 1ccs
Completed: EoSD, PCB, IN, MoF, SA, UFO, DDC, LoLK, HSiFS

チソウ タイゼン

  • tarzan cheetos
  • you'll thank me for the cropping later
Re: [Orig.] Lucy Summers
« Reply #2 on: December 04, 2011, 04:44:30 PM »
Thank you for reading it. :)

The backwards time progression was kind of hard to put together, mainly because I had to finish plot points before creating them :V

I'd imagine the ending was supposed to be bittersweet due to what happened to him, but still.


J.O.B

  • YOU CAN'T MAKE ME CHANGE
Re: [Orig.] Lucy Summers
« Reply #3 on: December 08, 2011, 11:44:48 AM »
I too like the backwards style of the story. Even though it finishes events before they even started, it still brings up new things each time.
I also like the length of the story. It's perfect for this style, with a brief description of all the events that happened while still going backwards in time.
It was a good read.

Aba Matindesu!

  • keep it gwiyoming
  • DASEU RAESISSEU
Re: [Orig.] Lucy Summers
« Reply #4 on: December 08, 2011, 12:28:59 PM »
This really reminds me of A Rose for Emily, somehow. I really liked the backwards take on this thing, it's like getting a backstory to a backstory to a backstory to... you get the idea.


teets mi hao 2 2hu teets mi teets mi hao 2 2hu

チソウ タイゼン

  • tarzan cheetos
  • you'll thank me for the cropping later
Re: [Orig.] Lucy Summers
« Reply #5 on: December 08, 2011, 04:53:15 PM »
lol i thought of an inception joke
I guess the Rose for Emily deal was inevitable. We just finished the Gothic Literature unit in my English class.

I too like the backwards style of the story. Even though it finishes events before they even started, it still brings up new things each time.
I also like the length of the story. It's perfect for this style, with a brief description of all the events that happened while still going backwards in time.
It was a good read.

Yeah, the whole "finishing events before creating them" deal took a fair amount of preparation to do.
That doesn't mean I invested any, however :V

Thanks for reading...
I figure I'll post another story, you know, as soon as I think of one :P


Alfred F. Jones

  • Estamos orgullosos del Batall?n Lincoln
  • *
  • y de la lucha que hizo por Madrid
Re: [Orig.] Lucy Summers
« Reply #6 on: December 08, 2011, 06:04:49 PM »
Yeah, A Rose For Emily was also the first thing I thought of. Which is good, since I liked that story.

This was neat. I'll have to try reverse chronology sometime.

チソウ タイゼン

  • tarzan cheetos
  • you'll thank me for the cropping later
Re: [Orig.] Lucy Summers
« Reply #7 on: December 08, 2011, 08:05:41 PM »
Lol it's not for the faint of heart

I suppose if you knew exactly what you wanted to write, it'd work, but I started the story like this:

"Hmm, I've had some idea for some time about a mentally ill woman murdering her husband. Let's think about how this would end."
*Writes 1935"
"Huh, what happens before that?"
*Writes 1927*
"Well, I might as well write the rest this way :V"
*Continues*
"Hm... let's think of what she would be like after having killed him."
"This is the incident itself."
"Some financial problems to set up the tension.
"Okay, now let's set it up such that they look like a happy couple that's getting married. Include extra-sappy dialouge."

"Huh, that was an interesting story."


Aba Matindesu!

  • keep it gwiyoming
  • DASEU RAESISSEU
Re: [Orig.] Lucy Summers
« Reply #8 on: December 09, 2011, 06:00:48 AM »
lol i thought of an inception joke
I guess the Rose for Emily deal was inevitable. We just finished the Gothic Literature unit in my English class.
i almost forgot we're like the same age or something lol

I think I'll post my own little something something for Lit class on here now.


teets mi hao 2 2hu teets mi teets mi hao 2 2hu