Author Topic: Mystearica's random short stories! Current Story: New Beginning in Gensokyo  (Read 13624 times)

MysTeariousYukari

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Re: Mystearica's random short stories! Idea's accepted!
« Reply #30 on: August 15, 2010, 02:57:59 PM »
Ok, I need to force this update. I hate going this long without updating, especially when I have this much formed together.

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"Unyu? Not an intruder? That seems hard to believe... but I'll trust you Satori-sama." This Okuu said, blushing a bit as she lowered that cannon thing and rather then looking enraged, a sort of smile. "So, you say she wishes to speak with me about something?"

"I'm glad your listening to reason Okuu. Yes that is correct. Shinku, this is Okuu." Satori said, motioning for me to come closer.

"Hello Okuu, I'm Shinku Yakumo. I came here to request something of you." I paused, still trying to gather myself from after staring down that cannon-thing. "Please train me!"

"Unyu? Me, train you? Umm, I'm not really that great at training people, unless you have powers over heat or something similar, I can't help past Danmaku and flight. Plus, you seem very powerful as is, why would you need my help? Oh, and please call me by my name, Utsuho, Okuu is more of a nick-name that far to many people know me as." She asked, getting confused. Also, what the heck does 'Unyu' even mean?

"My power is but a blank slate waiting for someone to right on it, for a Notable to affect it's nature and change what it is, and the sheer amount of power your sensing, is my potential... or so I'm told." I said to Utsuho, bowing politly.

"Uh, um, well, ahh... Dangit! Ok, fine, I'll teach you, but please be warned, things are gonna be hell for you, Shinku." She said, blushing as she tried to figure out her words, before giving in to teaching me. "Follow me, and make sure you can keep up with my pace, it's all or nothing." Utsuho said, as she started floating above the ground a bit, turn around completly and flew off. I dashed off after her, trying to avoid tripping on the various animal and their toys.

After about a minute of chasing her through the halls and passages of the Palace of Earth Spirits, I saw Utsuho fly down into a cavern of some sort, and followed her in. I was glad no animals or toys littered the ground here, just rock, as it meant I could run as fast as I could. You might not have known, but I am freaking fast once I get going, and in that cavern, I could get going. I was actually catching up to Utsuho at the rate I was going, that or she was slowing down, but at the time, I didn't worry about that.

As I got close to her, she shouted for me to stop, which sadly I am not so good at. When I get going, I need a good chunk of distance to slow down, I can't stop that quickly unless I hit something solid, like a brick wall... Or a Hell Raven. Slamming into Utsuho that fast was very painful.

"Good thing I stopped you, you would have died otherwise. Up ahead is my least favourite part of the Underground to pass though, the Chasm of Souls. Spirits of the dand wander through here aimlessly until guided by Orin, or sometimes that Shinigami working for The Yama." She said, clearly not happy to have to go through this Chasm.

"Umm, two questions, why is the Chasm your least favourite area, and if you feel that way about it, why are we going through here?"

"Ok, why we are going here? The why I normally take to where we are headed, The Core, requires flight, tight cornering and quick reaction time, none of which you have. Why I hate going here? Evil spirits. Unless you have powers related to spirits of the dead, like Orin, these things are dangerous as hell. They attack anything other then themselves and those with powers related to spirits, and if you fire back at them, you get a chain reaction, they release more bullets within 2 seconds of shooting after being hit then they release within 20 seconds normally, and the counter firing triggers all the others nearby to release tons of bullets. When your main method of fighting is Danmaku, your natural reaction to being shot at it to shoot back. This will get you killed in the Chasm." The Hell Raven explained, clearly annoyed about every detail.

"So what do we do, go through as quickly as possible, sneak by, or have this Orin help us?" I was dreading the thought of that much danmaku being shot at me. I know of the hell that is Lunatic, but this sounded just plan mean in comparison.

"We walk right through, going straight down towards The Core. If we are lucky enough, Orin will have cleared the main path of most of the spirits recently and only a few will be around. If we don't act threatening, or make sudden movements and such, they should ignore us.

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Will add the rest later, can't add more right now. Sorry >_<

MysTeariousYukari

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Re: Mystearica's random short stories! Idea's accepted!
« Reply #31 on: August 26, 2010, 08:51:12 PM »
Okay, time for an update! Also, I just noticed, this is my 2nd page ^_^ Thanks to everyone who was been reading this!

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"So, basically, I just follow you through here till we are through and hope the evil spirits ignore us?" Honestly, I'm not an idiot, but that idea sounded boring, and being in Gensokyo, I would prefer excitement, but oh well.

"Well, that's the plan..." Utsuho said, as an adorable little kitty brought a note to Utsuho. "Hm... how confident are you at running very very fast while being shot at? Orin sent me this message saying that the spirits are being stubborn and are staying around the path to the Core. I hope your ready, cause if your not, your adventures here will end, and that will be such a shame... I just said that, didn't I? The path is straight, but I'll lead, draw the fire."

I jinxed it, didn't I? "Ok... Well, this could have been worse. This could have been part of the training." I said, joking around with the last part.

"Unyu? You want to count this as training? Ok! Hope you can dodge Danmaku fine! No drawing fire for me then~" Utsuho said, either thinking I was serious, or just plain being cruel.

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Remind me to find and kill the guy who planned out how big the Chasm of Souls would be. 20 minutes of constant running, being shot at by evil spirits that wanted me dead, imagining this song playing, and praying that this was just some really detailed dream. But eventually, I made it to the Core, with Utsuho already waiting for me.

The Core, hellish, brutal, hot beyond any summer heat wave in the world and then some, fit for no life at all, yet oddly appealing. The Core was, quite simply, a huge room in the underground cavern with a giant fire ball floating below a large rock platform that connected to the Chasm and a few other places by way of a long and narrow rock path, easily 50 meters, the platforms center held various things on it, what you might expect in a bedroom, with Utsuho sitting on the bed.

"Heh, I see you passed your first test." Utsuho said, giving a little laugh. "Welcome to the Core, and my Nest." Utsuho then got off the bed and flew over to me. "2nd test, cross the rock path, alive. It will start to crumble away when I snap my fingers, get to the platform before it crumbles completely and you fall to your death. All or Nothing!" This woman seemed pretty cruel with these tests, my life hanging in the balance with each and every one.

I hear her snap her fingers and run with everything I got in me. She wasn't kidding! The path is actually crumbling away as I run! I can feel the path fall away as I run, and the heat rising from that fire ball below. Oh crud, the path's falling is catching up with me, at this rate, I'm toast! I'm almost there... I can make it... come on body, run faster... No! I feel the path fall away from under one foot, and I leap foward as best I can...!

... Not falling...

...... Not burning...

......... Not dead...

I made it... I made it... I made it!

"Heh... didn't think you would actually make it. Shinku, you are the bravest woman I have seen since Hakurei and that Mage beat me to a pulp.

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Life or Death training is very dangerous! Girls are preparing for hell, hot and nuke, please wait warmly for next update~

Esifex

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  • *
  • It shall rise again
Re: Mystearica's random short stories! Idea's accepted!
« Reply #32 on: August 26, 2010, 08:53:04 PM »
Is it Training From Hell if they're actually IN Hell already?

MysTeariousYukari

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Re: Mystearica's random short stories! Idea's accepted!
« Reply #33 on: August 26, 2010, 09:10:02 PM »
Is it Training From Hell if they're actually IN Hell already?

Ummm... sure? I honestly don't know, and with my sleep pattern being messed up, I'm not thinking all that much. I am sorry if you see any issues in my writing. I blame lack of proper amounts of sleep.

Esifex

  • Though the sun may set
  • *
  • It shall rise again
Re: Mystearica's random short stories! Idea's accepted!
« Reply #34 on: August 26, 2010, 09:44:25 PM »
I was making a silly joke.

MysTeariousYukari

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Re: Mystearica's random short stories! Idea's accepted!
« Reply #35 on: August 26, 2010, 10:57:01 PM »
I was making a silly joke.

Oh... Well still, any mistakes I make and such, I blame lack of sleep and writing about an hour before I go to sleep.

MysTeariousYukari

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Re: Mystearica's random short stories! Idea's accepted!
« Reply #36 on: September 08, 2010, 07:43:01 PM »
Sorry for the delay, I haven't had much access to the comp whenever an idea hit me. But, the moment you have all been waiting warmly for~

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?Hakurei and that Mage were crazy brave, they took me on and didn?t even run once I pulled a spellcard out. Most humans would run just at the sound my cards make when declared.?

Holy wow it is HOT! I feel my strength and energy being sapped by the heat, it?s difficult to even stand. Does not help that I did a ton of desperate running earlier.

?Hmm, you look tired... I have two tests for you, one will be ongoing until you complete it. First, you must be able to keep up with me while flying, second, survive!? Utsuho said, taking off and getting some distance away from the platform... ?Explosion Sign ?Tera Flare!?? She declared, sounding rather happy, in the evil way.

O.O For the love of all that is good and holy... I am supposed to dodge THAT!? Without flight!? Note to self: Utsuho is just mean when giving tests.

?Hahaha, ahahaha! Even the Mage got hit by this at least once!? Utsuho said, laughing like a villain.

I could see why the ?Mage? got hit by this, giant freaking suns being shot at me, this is just plain evil. Sure I can get to Parsee on a good day without continues on Normal, if I am lucky. Capping a Lunatic card is beyond me right now >.> Intense heat, can barely move and intense cards... Oh well...

I moved to about the middle of the platform, give me a bit more dodging room, which I needed badly! The card was so fast and intense, that describing it would be difficult. I was diving one way to avoid a shot, crawling out of the way of the next, barely getting to one knee and diving out of the way of another, until...

?Not bad for a flightless Human, Raven Sign ?Yatagarasu Dive!? Utsuho declared, flying right at me extremely fast! I swear I heard an explosion and saw a shockwave when she started moving.

?Oh crap!? I managed to stand up, barely, and dove to the right as quickly as I could, but still feeling Utsuho hit me in the legs. To my misfortune, this sent me right off the side of the platform...

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Girls are preparing for not dying, please wait warmly and have a tea~

MysTeariousYukari

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Re: Mystearica's random short stories! Idea's accepted!
« Reply #37 on: September 20, 2010, 07:45:39 PM »
Ok, I'm working on an update. I'm so so so sorry about this, balance of school, work, Shrinemaiden antics and this leaves little time to write. I hope this update makes up for the delay. Once again, sorry for the delay. :blush:

Oh, and if anyone knows how to change the topic title, I'd love to know as well.

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Wait... I'm falling... and below is... Oh no!

Not now... not here... I can't die yet, not yet!

But, it looks like I am, Utsuho isn't coming... I'm below the lowest point on the platform...

The heat is intense... can't feel anything but heat...

"No... not... yet... I will not die here... NOT YET! I WILL NOT DIE!"

I feel power build up within my body, intense power...

-----

Spoiler:
I love this part, so epic of you :*

Oh come on! Your quiet for so long and chime in now!? Jeez you... Oh well...

Spoiler:
I haven't had any of these lines in a while, I needed to~

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I feels like my body went into auto-pilot, acting on it's own, and somehow, I'm rising up, not falling down.

I'm above the platform now... Utsuho looks so surprised, and scared, almost, it's funny.

"Sh-shinku!? Y-you're alive!? Oh My Yatagarasu, I thought you were dead! And, you're flying! I knew you'd pick it up fast... that, or you would die fast."

"I'm... flying?" I looked around, and holy cow! She's right, I'm flying, I'M FLYING!

"You bet you are! Ready for more Shinku? You still haven't passed that test~" Utsuho said, almost mockingly.

Utsuho pulled out a spell card, and I could make it out from here... Atomic Fire "Uncontainable Nuclear Reaction"

A voice rang out in my head, telling me what to do. I put my hands out in front of me, focus...

That rush of power returned... and that voice with it "Claim thy birthright... Claim that which is yours... Claim your power, and claim your Destiny!"

"Spellcard! Atomic Fire "Nuclear Fusion!" Wait... what!?" The Hell Raven seemed... surprised, to say the least.

A ring of huge bullets went flying in all directions, and I realised... How do I control myself when flying?

Thankfully, the first ring flew by harmlessly...

I tried just leaning in the direction I wanted to go, hoping it might work, and... It did! Ok, I can now actually fly!

Then came a bunch of blue bullets going in all directions from Utsuho, and I tried to move through them.

Ow, those hurt. But it's only like a stinging pain.

I charge in at Utsuho, as best as I can, being so slow, and get hit dead on by one of those big bullets!

"Owww... that hurt..." I said, trying to ease the pain.

"Heh, looks like I win then? Nice try... but what happened to my Spellcard?"

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Hope you guys like this~
« Last Edit: September 21, 2010, 04:22:58 PM by MysteariousYukari »

Re: Mystearica's random short stories! Idea's accepted!
« Reply #38 on: September 20, 2010, 08:14:20 PM »
Whew, finally got around to reading all this.

Alright, first with the pros. I've noticed that your writing style has improved as you've gone along, which is good. The story itself is also an interesting concept, and it seems to be developing quite well. The characters' personalities are suitable and distinct, and everyone is portrayed well.

I still see some things you might want to work on, though. I really would suggest that you don't use emoticons in the body of the writing. Also, keep in mind the difference between "your" and "you're".

Other than that, great progress so far. Keep it up. :)
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MysTeariousYukari

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I am so so so sorry about taking so long :( Little computer access, and no interest for writing when I did get the chance.

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"Shinku, what did you do to my spell card? That card was stronger then what I had declared, and I saw a strange light from you when I declared... and why did you rush in?" Utsuho asked.

"I-i'm not sure what I did, I was just following a gut feeling. I rushed in because I don't know how to shoot danmaku, so I was hoping I might be able to hit you out of the attack." I admitted.

"Did some voice mention something like "Obtain you destiny" and all that? Cause if so, that was you awakening to your power." She asked me.

"Yes actually, along with using words like thou and thine."

"I had that experience before. A few tips for you on danmaku use, focus, imagine the bullet as a part of yourself, an extension if you will, and call upon your power. Try it." The Hell Raven explained.

I spent who knows how long following those tips, and eventually...

"Ahhh Haaaaaa!" *pichuuun*

"Wow! Managed to fire some bullets, and hit me! Shinku, you are doing great!" The Hell Raven said, congratulating me.

"Th-thanks Utsuho." I said, blushing.

"Hmmm. I think that's enough training for now, lets head back to the palace. You look exhausted, and like you were nearly killed." Utsuho said, leading me back to the Palace of Earth Spirits. Thankfully, the trip back was clear of evil spirits and such.

---

Once we returned to the Palace, Utsuho, Satori and I sat by a table having some tea.

"I heard of your training from Orin, she mentioned that your were doing much better then she expected." Satori said after taking a sip of tea.

"Well, I can fly, even if it's only slowly, I managed a few bullets, and according to Utsuho, I've awakened to use of my power, Umm, how long were we gone anyway?"

"From when you and Utsuho left, it's been... almost a day and a half. The progress you made in that time is immense, far more then most might make in a week." the motherly mind-reader said. "At this rate, you'll be comparing to some of the stronger Notable's by the end of the week."

I could tell I was blushing once Satori said that, I was never good with compliments, and she giggled a bit,

"Yeah, about that. Shinku, you've already pretty reached the limitations of what I can do for you as is. Unless you end up with powers extremly similar to mine, or your body becomes capable of living off radiation and such, I can't help any further, the rest is practice. But I can say this, without any doubt. Shinku, you have passed every test I threw at you. I want you to take this gift, as proof of our time together." Utsuho said, as she pulled out something from her pocket.

"What is it?"

"I'm not completly sure, all I know is that it contains a mysterious power within, and was from some scaled beast from long ago, I think it started with a D... Unyu, I forget. I thought it might be good for you, what with your power being a mystery to us."

As I touched the scale, the voice rang out in my mind again "A store of our power, a fragment of our greatness. The strength of our clan becomes your own."

"Shinku, you look tired, and it is almost dinner time, why don't you stay the night?" Satori asked, to which I agreed.

The rest of the night was rather simple and peaceful. Having dinner, and finally getting some rest.

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Sorry if this took too long, or wasn't all that good. Lemme tell you, dBu's Shall we Fuse and 3rd Eye are really great for helping keep your spirits up, as is the song Cavalrymaid, a remix of Flowering Night, from Iron Attack. I was listening to those the enitre time I was writing up this update.

Esifex

  • Though the sun may set
  • *
  • It shall rise again