Author Topic: Guide me along this barren path  (Read 172049 times)

Zengar Zombolt

  • Space-Time Tuning Circle - Wd/Fr
  • Green-Red Divine Clock
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #750 on: July 06, 2009, 04:59:36 PM »
Does anything work in here?
>Disco Bleed

Pako

  • Forum pessimist, chatbox optimist
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #751 on: July 06, 2009, 05:01:19 PM »
> Check inventory.

> Yell to Kaguya to hurry up with whatever she is doing.

> make love to yourself. Because you know: you must first learn to love yourself, before you can love other people.

This shameful piece of shit was made by a certain Anonymous-Fairy, but is now deleted- bawwwww.

Pesco

  • Trickster Rabbit Tewi
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  • Make a yukkuri and take it easy with me
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #752 on: July 06, 2009, 05:09:15 PM »
> Blame Pako for lack of Taco

Hello Purvis

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  • Hello Jerry
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #753 on: July 06, 2009, 05:10:48 PM »
Does anything work in here?
>Disco Bleed

>Dude. That's a two part skill. Now you're just trying to make fools of us all. Besides, disco bandits are gross. Also the only skill you permed was Really Expensive Jewelrymaking.

> Check inventory.

> Yell to Kaguya to hurry up with whatever she is doing.

> make love to yourself. Because you know: you must first learn to love yourself, before you can love other people.

>Your Inventory contains:
>Slightly Worn Towel
>Aspirin
>Ibuprofen
>Heal Brand potion.
>Antacids
>Cough Drops
>Electric Razor (disassembled, out of power)
>The Clothes on your Back (Worn as clothes)
>Piece of Singed Dented Metal
>Plastic Doll Bits
>10 Spare Needles (In Mystia's possession)
>Spare Sewing Machine Parts
>Fireflies in a Jar w/Poltergeist Saliva
>Dinged Up Proton Pack w/Ghost Trap
>Yukari's Cap. (Worn a hat)
>Rumia's Ribbon
>You yell at Kaguya. She nods in reply.
>How can you make love, man? Love isn't a thing, it's a force. You can't make a force, man! It just doesn't work like that! The government tells you you can, but you can't trust them!

> Blame Pako for lack of Taco

>Man, a taco would be nice... Maybe Mystia could make one?
>The swarm has been greatly diminished by the combined forces of Rumia, your boot-tossing, and the frogs. You can't make out a voice in the buzzing at all anymore...

>_

Pako

  • Forum pessimist, chatbox optimist
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #754 on: July 06, 2009, 05:12:56 PM »
> Blame Pesco for lack of Pesco-vegetarians (Oh god, I'm a nerd)

> Ask Mystia for a chocolade Taco.

This shameful piece of shit was made by a certain Anonymous-Fairy, but is now deleted- bawwwww.

Zbo

  • Seeker of truth
  • A guy.
    • Monkey's Forest... lulz
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #755 on: July 06, 2009, 05:13:52 PM »
> Grope Mystia's tits


Insanity in individuals is something rare - but in groups, parties, nations and epochs, it is the rule. - Friedrich Nietzsche

Zengar Zombolt

  • Space-Time Tuning Circle - Wd/Fr
  • Green-Red Divine Clock
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #756 on: July 06, 2009, 05:31:51 PM »
>Dude. That's a two part skill. Now you're just trying to make fools of us all. Besides, disco bandits are gross. Also the only skill you permed was Really Expensive Jewelrymaking.
Ok, WE SUCK. I mean seriously, there's bots for that.
>check skill list

Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #757 on: July 06, 2009, 05:51:20 PM »
> Blame Pesco for lack of Pesco-vegetarians (Oh god, I'm a nerd)
> Ask Mystia for a chocolade Taco.

>Maybe you should take responsibility instead of blaming others.
>Mystia is too busy singing to really give a proper answer to that.

> Grope Mystia's tits

>But she does seem to have figured out your methodology of saying a weird thing then hassling her; and she interrupts your attempt at molestation with an elbow to the ribs. Whilst keeping tune; which is pretty impressive.

Ok, WE SUCK. I mean seriously, there's bots for that.
>check skill list

>You skill list includes:
>Really Expensive Jewelrymaking
>Armorcraftiness

>_

Pako

  • Forum pessimist, chatbox optimist
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #758 on: July 06, 2009, 05:59:32 PM »
> Ask Kaguya how long it will take to finish what she is doing in manga chapters.

> Tell the bees they suck.

> Check if there are more touhous around.

This shameful piece of shit was made by a certain Anonymous-Fairy, but is now deleted- bawwwww.

Zengar Zombolt

  • Space-Time Tuning Circle - Wd/Fr
  • Green-Red Divine Clock
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #759 on: July 06, 2009, 06:11:26 PM »

>You skill list includes:
>Really Expensive Jewelrymaking
>Armorcraftiness
...
FUCK THIS
>OK, check stats. I'm losing my faith here...

Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #760 on: July 06, 2009, 07:17:29 PM »
>Apologise to Suwako for your earlier transgressions
>Pray to Suwako for more frogs
Advocate of Transhumanism

ES-Anthy

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Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #761 on: July 06, 2009, 10:32:28 PM »
>Use our skill of armor craftiness to form makeshift armor by combining Slightly Worn Towel, Electric Razor, The Clothes on your Back, Piece of Singed Dented Metal, Spare Sewing Machine Parts, and Rumia's ribbon.

Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #762 on: July 06, 2009, 11:49:12 PM »
> Ask Kaguya how long it will take to finish what she is doing in manga chapters.

> Tell the bees they suck.

> Check if there are more touhous around.

>Kaguya doesn't answer. Perhaps what she is doing precludes speech? Or maybe she really is that lazy.
>You insult the bees. The buzzing isn't coherent enough to really make out a reply. But you swear you can make out the outline of a most disturbing-looking fetal being among them. You shudder.
>It seems you are alone here. Which is kinda weird, wasn't Cirno in the courtyard?

>OK, check stats. I'm losing my faith here...

>STATS mean nothing to the Z Machine! Only DEEDS! Such as it is for a true man, such as it is for the Z Machine.

>Apologise to Suwako for your earlier transgressions
>Pray to Suwako for more frogs

>You pray to Suwako to forgive you. You're not sure if she's paying attention. But the swarm certainly is, as it seems to sacrifice all to lunge at you!

>Use our skill of armor craftiness to form makeshift armor by combining Slightly Worn Towel, Electric Razor, The Clothes on your Back, Piece of Singed Dented Metal, Spare Sewing Machine Parts, and Rumia's ribbon.

>Thankfully, the swarm is still a bit night-blinded, so you have time to throw together something. You use the Spare Sewing Machine parts to attach the Piece of Singed Dented Metal to the Slightly Worn Towel, and drape it over The Clothes On Your Back, which serve as underpadding. For decoration, you use Rumia's Ribbon to dangle the Electric Razor from the middle as an heraldic emblem. You now have an Orky Cuirass!
>The Orky Cuirass does a good job confounding the bees, as they try to blindly sting at you and hit the metal with a number of satisfying little thumps. Rumia and the Frogs make use of their distraction, and soon the last of the swarm is devoured.
>With a sort of popping noise, the world seems to shift back into focus. Looking around, you can see you are in the courtyard of Eientei, looking just as you left it only several minutes ago. It is as though the swarm never came. Cirno is here, looking very confused. "Where'd you guys com-THERE YOU ARE YOU FROG BASTARDS!" And then she goes to work freezing them again.
>The frogs are now bouncing around in circles, making them easy prey for Cirno. Rumia, as well, has taken to spinning in a circle, arms outstretched, whilst giggling to herself. Mystia sinks to her knees, and seems ready to weep with relief. Kaguya gently kneels down, and seems to be resting.
>You notice two things of interest where the majority of the swarm wind down. One seems to be a dragonfly made of silver. Another seems to be a strangely-shaped...thing, made of yellowish powder.

>_

UncertainJakutten

  • Then you should get out of the way when I tell you
  • Do you not trust my aim?
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #763 on: July 06, 2009, 11:52:00 PM »
Quote
>You notice two things of interest where the majority of the swarm wind down. One seems to be a dragonfly made of silver. Another seems to be a strangely-shaped...thing, made of yellowish powder.

>Pick up both of these

>Cry a little as we hug everyone in the ordeal

Hugs still solve everything.


Hello Purvis

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  • Hello Jerry
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #764 on: July 07, 2009, 12:05:35 AM »
>Pick up both of these
>Cry a little as we hug everyone in the ordeal

>You pick up Silver Dragonfly
>You pick up Giygas Made of Bee Pollen
>You give everyone a hug, and shed some manly tears, and feel better for it. Mystia even returns the hug. Rumia doesn't stop spinning, so you have to pass her over.

>_

Zengar Zombolt

  • Space-Time Tuning Circle - Wd/Fr
  • Green-Red Divine Clock
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #765 on: July 07, 2009, 01:02:18 AM »
>Apologize for accidentally summonning this beast.

Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #766 on: July 07, 2009, 01:04:56 AM »
>"Words are powerful," says Kaguya, looking toward you. "Use them wisely. But, I believe little harm was done. Please accept my apology for not being of more direct use to the battle, I was preoccupied with stifling the effects that entity was having on the world around it."

>_

♛ Apher-Forte

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Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #767 on: July 07, 2009, 01:07:04 AM »
> "♡♡♡♡♡♡♡KAGUYA♡♡♡♡♡♡♡" cheers for her!
  <-- my artwork thread, click me!
[ Find my cosplay photos here. ] OMG I HAVE TUMBLR FOLLOW PLZX Will You Remember Me... ?

Zengar Zombolt

  • Space-Time Tuning Circle - Wd/Fr
  • Green-Red Divine Clock
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #768 on: July 07, 2009, 01:13:41 AM »
>Wonder what the hell went wrong. We summonned the GUY made of bees, not the GIYGAS made of bees.

Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #769 on: July 07, 2009, 01:18:48 AM »
> "♡♡♡♡♡♡♡KAGUYA♡♡♡♡♡♡♡" cheers for her!

>There are no current plans for a Turkish version of this game. Please accept our apologies.

>Wonder what the hell went wrong. We summonned the GUY made of bees, not the GIYGAS made of bees.

>Maybe the guy was Giygas? Or possibly things just went terribly wrong somewhere. Or when all else fails, blame [Least favorite touhoe]

>_

UncertainJakutten

  • Then you should get out of the way when I tell you
  • Do you not trust my aim?
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #770 on: July 07, 2009, 03:25:44 AM »
>Snort the giygas made of bees


Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #771 on: July 07, 2009, 06:52:07 AM »
>Snort the giygas made of bees

>The frogs and Rumia have beaten you to devouring the Giygas made of bees.
>Rumia stop spinning, and looks over to you to say somthing. However, while her lips move and it's clear that she's trying to say something, all that comes out are odd distorted-sounding noises that do no resemble any kind of langauge in the least. She looks at you expectantly, clearly not noticing that anything was amiss with her speech.

>_

Pako

  • Forum pessimist, chatbox optimist
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #772 on: July 07, 2009, 07:49:42 AM »
> try to place Rumia's ribbon back into her hair.

> Tell Kaguya and Mystia to hurry the fuck up with the collecting of the bed and pillows

> We need to get our hardcoreness back, begin meditating.

This shameful piece of shit was made by a certain Anonymous-Fairy, but is now deleted- bawwwww.

Pesco

  • Trickster Rabbit Tewi
  • *
  • Make a yukkuri and take it easy with me
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #773 on: July 07, 2009, 07:53:24 AM »
> Pop the aspirin
> HELP ME EIRIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNN!!!!

Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #774 on: July 07, 2009, 08:32:19 AM »
> try to place Rumia's ribbon back into her hair.

> Tell Kaguya and Mystia to hurry the fuck up with the collecting of the bed and pillows

> We need to get our hardcoreness back, begin meditating.

>You have used Rumia's Ribbon to make the Orky Cuirass. Thankfully, the emblem is expendable. You remove the ribbon and the razor, replacing the latter in your inventory, and replace Rumia's Ribbon in her hair. It gets the forelock out of her eyes, at least! She says something in reply, or at least tries to, but all that comes out of her mouth is that horrible tinny distortion.
>In response to your command Kaguya stands, nods once, and leaves the courtyard. "You don't have to be so rude!" Mystia says, "We're just resting up after dealing with your mess!" And she follows Kaguya out.
>You meditate. But you know in your heart, the only way you could ever resume being hardcore is to change the course of history.

> Pop the aspirin
> HELP ME EIRIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNN!!!!

>You do not have an aspirin popper; nor any oil or a frypan to pop it in.
>You shout, but you're not sure if the imperative can be heard in Eirin's wing of the manor.

>_


Pesco

  • Trickster Rabbit Tewi
  • *
  • Make a yukkuri and take it easy with me
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #775 on: July 07, 2009, 08:34:24 AM »
> Clean your ears

Pako

  • Forum pessimist, chatbox optimist
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #776 on: July 07, 2009, 08:36:01 AM »
> Poke your Pako.

> Go taco hunting.

> Clean your nose.
« Last Edit: July 07, 2009, 08:40:09 AM by Pesco »

This shameful piece of shit was made by a certain Anonymous-Fairy, but is now deleted- bawwwww.

Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #777 on: July 07, 2009, 09:06:11 AM »
> Clean your ears

>Parsers do not have ears. What is wrong with you.

> Poke your Pako.

> Go taco hunting.

> Clean your nose.


>There's no such thing as that. Cripes!
>You start looking around for tacos. There's no really suitable ingredients, unless you wish to thaw out and butcher a frog. Even then, there is really nothing that would work as a suitable shell. Or soft tortilla if that's your style.
>Let's not start this again.
>You can hear some strained sounds in the halls west of the courtyard.

>_

Pako

  • Forum pessimist, chatbox optimist
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #778 on: July 07, 2009, 09:13:42 AM »
> Use ice as a shell for the taco, then take a frog, butcher it and place it in the ice shell, add some grass with that and some chocolade if it is available.

> Enjoy your chocolade tako!

This shameful piece of shit was made by a certain Anonymous-Fairy, but is now deleted- bawwwww.

Hello Purvis

  • *
  • Hello Jerry
Re: Guide me along this barren path
« Reply #779 on: July 07, 2009, 09:33:01 AM »
> Use ice as a shell for the taco, then take a frog, butcher it and place it in the ice shell, add some grass with that and some chocolade if it is available.

> Enjoy your chocolade tako!

>You claim a frozen frog. But before you can do much else, Mystia looks into the courtyard again. "You were the one in the hurry, right? Let's go."

>_