Author Topic: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!  (Read 248888 times)

capt. h

  • Only sane townie
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #90 on: December 12, 2010, 01:59:08 AM »
Anyway, I guess it kinda depends on who is faster and do they really want to use their powers...

I mean, if the whole of Gensokyo was on the offense, they could have just sent Yuuka and Yukari to fight him off, but of course there will consequences. I mean, if the strongest being in the world were to suddenly exist in your time and physical/mental plane, wouldn't you feel a little bit scared? If he actually did exist, I'd probably join sides with him.

So yeah, I was thinking of making a combined effort of the Gensokyo dwellers when they battle at the neutral limbo in the end. The trick is that when you're in a neutral limbo, it's supposed to be 1 VS 1 fight, but when you have all the Gensokyo dwellers transported there, all of their power = one person, so it's kinda an unfair fight.

But I've thought about how Flandre can break things (and assuming that she does not know of the Labyrinth Accelerator), she'd probably just break the guy, but he can still use the device to project his past/future selves into the plane and synchronizing them with the current time plane (to make sure there's no time paradox).

Then I would make the guy turn into a mecha after some very small error he had made (Undecided on this part, but I thought of making him only synchronizing half of his body with his past/future selves), goes batshit insane (Of course, the most powerful being must be a terrible loser :3) and transforms into a giant mecha.

Then he would open up a time rift and take something similar like his Labyrinth Accelerator but only that it can summon his past/future selves at incredible speeds and starts throwing them like danmaku! Then Suika would turn larger and the whole cast starts fending off the OC in their own way...

Well, even if it sounds like a ridiculous idea, it got my brain juices flowing. Been quite a long time since I've felt this way... :]

You have to be more specific about how he uses the labyrinth accelerator. Even if Flandre doesn't know what it does, I don't see why she wouldn't break it while he uses it. She does break things and people for the sake of breaking them, not because it's in her best interest.

Although a warning: I'm not sure that your character is the most powerful person in Gensokyo. The fact that all his toys exist means that Flandre can break them or Yukari can take them. His ability to summon defeated gods is actually a downgrade from Yukari's portal ability. His fundamental powers, which can't be stripped by either Flandre or Yukari, are his immortality, his transformation abilities, and his pocket dimension (Kaguya without her toys + Nue using just robots + Yukari's pocket dimension). (edit: forgot about the ability to counter attacks from gods. I'm not sure it matters though because neither Yukari nor Flandre use natural deity attacks.) If both of them had each others powers in that dimension, then Yukari could win in there easily because the border ability takes centuries to understand while Yukari got boosted to immortal status. Flandre might not be so lucky, but her insanity would help.

Yes, Flandre can rip the 12 minds of the multiverse out of him, and will likely do so when she breaks his head. In fact, she might like this guy. He has lots of cool toys and doesn't break when you break him.

(Though this discussion did give me a thought for a story idea involving dueling authors, where one author writes the actions of Mary Sue and the other author pens the counterattacks of the different touhou characters. Winner determined by who lives and isn't permanently sealed, knocked out, forced to retreat, etc. Legality of the moves judged by readers.)
« Last Edit: December 12, 2010, 02:05:01 AM by capt. h »

Drake

  • *
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #91 on: December 12, 2010, 05:16:28 AM »
This is the best discussion ever. Every post since Kuroi needs to be LSed.

A Colorful Calculating Creative and Cuddly Crafty Callipygous Clever Commander
- original art by Aiけん | ウサホリ -

Kuroi

  • I dodge bans and don't afraid of anything
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #92 on: December 12, 2010, 05:56:43 AM »
You have to be more specific about how he uses the labyrinth accelerator. Even if Flandre doesn't know what it does, I don't see why she wouldn't break it while he uses it. She does break things and people for the sake of breaking them, not because it's in her best interest.

Although a warning: I'm not sure that your character is the most powerful person in Gensokyo. The fact that all his toys exist means that Flandre can break them or Yukari can take them. His ability to summon defeated gods is actually a downgrade from Yukari's portal ability. His fundamental powers, which can't be stripped by either Flandre or Yukari, are his immortality, his transformation abilities, and his pocket dimension (Kaguya without her toys + Nue using just robots + Yukari's pocket dimension). (edit: forgot about the ability to counter attacks from gods. I'm not sure it matters though because neither Yukari nor Flandre use natural deity attacks.) If both of them had each others powers in that dimension, then Yukari could win in there easily because the border ability takes centuries to understand while Yukari got boosted to immortal status. Flandre might not be so lucky, but her insanity would help.

Yes, Flandre can rip the 12 minds of the multiverse out of him, and will likely do so when she breaks his head. In fact, she might like this guy. He has lots of cool toys and doesn't break when you break him.

(Though this discussion did give me a thought for a story idea involving dueling authors, where one author writes the actions of Mary Sue and the other author pens the counterattacks of the different touhou characters. Winner determined by who lives and isn't permanently sealed, knocked out, forced to retreat, etc. Legality of the moves judged by readers.)

Well, time to expand this OC's power list.

Let's see. I was thinking of making the OC have the natural ability of the power to repair items/himself within his radius. 'Repair' in his mind is to 'restore things that is thought to be its former glory', so he can repair just almost anything, only withdraw with this power is that he can't repair things he seen for the first time that are broken (Let's say he found a broken tractor, he can't repair it because he'd only seen it once, and he never saw the tractor when it was in it's best shape). Also, this thing is automatic, so other than being immortal, he can repair his wounds quick.

And also things that he owns in particular (such as the Labyrinth Accelerator) can still work even after being destroyed. Everything he owns is actually, spirits! Breaking the Accelerator would only mean it has no physical manifestation, thus, it can still work, even without the vessel.

Also, if things get too rough on the neutral limbo, I was thinking that he would transport the enemy and himself to the ends of the universe, where the path to HIS universe exists. Unfortunately, he can only take them as far as the entrance into his own universe (in which if any person tries to fight him inside there, they will lose instantly, as it is his perfect universe).

And if things still don't go his way...well... I have this as a plot that his perfect universe is actually a mobile fortress and that he only uses it as a final resort. The universe, nicknamed 'Ozzy', will be used to crush the Gensokyo dwellers' universe, thus obliterating them. The universe and the other universe colliding each other will create a massive shockwave proportional to a Big Bang, but since this character's universe is a mobile being AND he can manipulate it, he can alter the speeds, thus, he can make the shock wave proportional to a light jab at the back to as powerful as an infinite Bing Bang storm.

But I'd probably have some rough ideas that the universe Gensokyo is in is kinda special, thus making it harder to crush it.

Anyway, moving on with the plot, as the story goes, I thought that Suika, Yukari and Yuuka would team up in defeating the OC. At this stage, they would probably near the entrance of the OC's universe. I was thinking of Suika battling with the OC in epic proportions and that they're very titanic in size. I also thought that Yukari could wrap up her border around Suika's fist and when Suika gets her fist close to the OC's face, Yukari opens another border, Yuuka gets in and using Nitori's gadgets (and a radiation blast from Utsuho as a speed enhancer), blast off into the face of the OC in which she gives the most devasting blow she can ever give to a man using her fist!

Thus, matching her power with the OC! The OC will then be not satisfied and get into his perfect universe, in where he will try to ram it into their universe! Then... (let me think first, will explain later in later posts :derp:)

This is the best discussion ever. Every post since Kuroi needs to be LSed.

LSed? What does that mean? ???
« Last Edit: December 12, 2010, 06:00:39 AM by Kuroi »
I'll add something witty and amusing here later.

capt. h

  • Only sane townie
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #93 on: December 12, 2010, 06:39:57 AM »
Well, time to expand this OC's power list.

Let's see. I was thinking of making the OC have the natural ability of the power to repair items/himself within his radius. 'Repair' in his mind is to 'restore things that is thought to be its former glory', so he can repair just almost anything, only withdraw with this power is that he can't repair things he seen for the first time that are broken (Let's say he found a broken tractor, he can't repair it because he'd only seen it once, and he never saw the tractor when it was in it's best shape). Also, this thing is automatic, so other than being immortal, he can repair his wounds quick.

And also things that he owns in particular (such as the Labyrinth Accelerator) can still work even after being destroyed. Everything he owns is actually, spirits! Breaking the Accelerator would only mean it has no physical manifestation, thus, it can still work, even without the vessel.

Also, if things get too rough on the neutral limbo, I was thinking that he would transport the enemy and himself to the ends of the universe, where the path to HIS universe exists. Unfortunately, he can only take them as far as the entrance into his own universe (in which if any person tries to fight him inside there, they will lose instantly, as it is his perfect universe).

And if things still don't go his way...well... I have this as a plot that his perfect universe is actually a mobile fortress and that he only uses it as a final resort. The universe, nicknamed 'Ozzy', will be used to crush the Gensokyo dwellers' universe, thus obliterating them. The universe and the other universe colliding each other will create a massive shockwave proportional to a Big Bang, but since this character's universe is a mobile being AND he can manipulate it, he can alter the speeds, thus, he can make the shock wave proportional to a light jab at the back to as powerful as an infinite Bing Bang storm.

But I'd probably have some rough ideas that the universe Gensokyo is in is kinda special, thus making it harder to crush it.

Anyway, moving on with the plot, as the story goes, I thought that Suika, Yukari and Yuuka would team up in defeating the OC. At this stage, they would probably near the entrance of the OC's universe. I was thinking of Suika battling with the OC in epic proportions and that they're very titanic in size. I also thought that Yukari could wrap up her border around Suika's fist and when Suika gets her fist close to the OC's face, Yukari opens another border, Yuuka gets in and using Nitori's gadgets (and a radiation blast from Utsuho as a speed enhancer), blast off into the face of the OC in which she gives the most devasting blow she can ever give to a man using her fist!

Thus, matching her power with the OC! The OC will then be not satisfied and get into his perfect universe, in where he will try to ram it into their universe! Then... (let me think first, will explain later in later posts :derp:)

LSed? What does that mean? ???

I’m curious too, never saw the LS acronym before and when I looked it up I came up empty. I’m also curious why you are making your OC this powerful. I agree that you may need to make it a group battle at this rate.

Shinki would be high on my list of people to face this OC. She created her own world from scrach as well. And she would know best whether someone could be invincible in their own dimension or not, as well as the source of said persons invincibility.

__________________

From here on I’m mostly responding to your OC as a challenge. Trying to beat him is a lot of fun, and I'll pull out all the stops:

With Flandre, I'm not sure making something simply into spirits would actually protect it from her. See, her ability is to, from any range, grab the 'eye' of anything, and crush it in her palm. Some might say that she crushes objects by crushing there spirit.

At this stage, a supreme version of Sakuya seems to be the best opponent for your OC. Manipulation of space and time that extends to whatever objects she chooses (as evidenced by the fact that the Scarlet Devil Mansion is bigger on the inside than the outside), and does so permanently. This all goes under the theory that Sakuya’s time based abilities – placed to the max, exceed even the talents of Yukari. Ability to slow time to go with the ability to speed it up implemented onto the OC will let Yuuka do some very nasty things before he can respond. Or if Sakuya is alone, she could stop time, stab the OC repeatedly in the head, wait for him to be almost healed, and repeat; so that the character never gets an oportunity during which his brain works. A localized time stop may even last long enough for the full moon to come and Keine to rewriting history so that you character never discovers Gensokyo. In the mean time. Keine would probably be concealing a lot of history. However, even if she can't localize the time stop around the OC, the weapons the OC weilds have a good chance that their repair could be slowed and space manipulated much like the dimensions of the Scarlet Devil Mansion, or worse, the weapons copied much like Sakuya is thought to copy her knives.

Koishi Komeiji has complete manipulation of the subconscious. Her ability makes her the ultimate assassin, as it’s a type of psychic invisibility that lets her conceal anything, since she herself can steal your food without you realizing it. Utilizing her would probably protect the residents that aren't as good at combat, but are extremely effective at taking out threats indirectly. Or, since there's only one mind to deal with, she could even simply place Gensokyo into the OC's subconscious, thus protecting the country by removing it from the OC's mind.


_______________

However, I think we can expand the ambiguous powers of touhou characters even more now that we have a Sue hardy enough to handle it.

A lot of touhou characters have a lot of abilities that are very ambiguous and get around the direct method. For example, Keine could hypothetically protect the world of Gensokyo from anything by rewriting the history of the thing if she can last until the full moon, so that the OC never encounters the universe. Remilia will most likely make sure Gensokyo’s fate is safe. Reimu interestingly has a spell card that lets her transcend reality, making her invincible.
From touhou wiki:

Fantasy Heaven
“Supreme Master-Arts by any means. With Reimu's ability to float, she floats from everything in reality and becomes invincible.
If it wasn't just for play (with time limit), no one could beat her with any method.”

 The only way to beat it is timeout, but timeout is exclusive to spell cards and not to general battle, depending on interpretation.

Spoiler:
Not yet fully expanded ramblings: Fujiwara no Mokou also has an interesting card call “possessed by phoenix” for, well, possessing people, and then there’s Yuugi Hoshiguma’s incredibly ambiguous power of control over supernatural phenomenon. Since a lot of your character's abilities play on the supernatural, this could give Yuugi quite an edge.
« Last Edit: December 12, 2010, 07:40:02 AM by capt. h »

Kuroi

  • I dodge bans and don't afraid of anything
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #94 on: December 12, 2010, 11:19:01 AM »
I?m curious too, never saw the LS acronym before and when I looked it up I came up empty. I?m also curious why you are making your OC this powerful. I agree that you may need to make it a group battle at this rate.

Shinki would be high on my list of people to face this OC. She created her own world from scrach as well. And she would know best whether someone could be invincible in their own dimension or not, as well as the source of said persons invincibility.

__________________

From here on I?m mostly responding to your OC as a challenge. Trying to beat him is a lot of fun, and I'll pull out all the stops:

With Flandre, I'm not sure making something simply into spirits would actually protect it from her. See, her ability is to, from any range, grab the 'eye' of anything, and crush it in her palm. Some might say that she crushes objects by crushing there spirit.

At this stage, a supreme version of Sakuya seems to be the best opponent for your OC. Manipulation of space and time that extends to whatever objects she chooses (as evidenced by the fact that the Scarlet Devil Mansion is bigger on the inside than the outside), and does so permanently. This all goes under the theory that Sakuya?s time based abilities ? placed to the max, exceed even the talents of Yukari. Ability to slow time to go with the ability to speed it up implemented onto the OC will let Yuuka do some very nasty things before he can respond. Or if Sakuya is alone, she could stop time, stab the OC repeatedly in the head, wait for him to be almost healed, and repeat; so that the character never gets an oportunity during which his brain works. A localized time stop may even last long enough for the full moon to come and Keine to rewriting history so that you character never discovers Gensokyo. In the mean time. Keine would probably be concealing a lot of history. However, even if she can't localize the time stop around the OC, the weapons the OC weilds have a good chance that their repair could be slowed and space manipulated much like the dimensions of the Scarlet Devil Mansion, or worse, the weapons copied much like Sakuya is thought to copy her knives.

Koishi Komeiji has complete manipulation of the subconscious. Her ability makes her the ultimate assassin, as it?s a type of psychic invisibility that lets her conceal anything, since she herself can steal your food without you realizing it. Utilizing her would probably protect the residents that aren't as good at combat, but are extremely effective at taking out threats indirectly. Or, since there's only one mind to deal with, she could even simply place Gensokyo into the OC's subconscious, thus protecting the country by removing it from the OC's mind.


_______________

However, I think we can expand the ambiguous powers of touhou characters even more now that we have a Sue hardy enough to handle it.

A lot of touhou characters have a lot of abilities that are very ambiguous and get around the direct method. For example, Keine could hypothetically protect the world of Gensokyo from anything by rewriting the history of the thing if she can last until the full moon, so that the OC never encounters the universe. Remilia will most likely make sure Gensokyo?s fate is safe. Reimu interestingly has a spell card that lets her transcend reality, making her invincible.
From touhou wiki:

Fantasy Heaven
?Supreme Master-Arts by any means. With Reimu's ability to float, she floats from everything in reality and becomes invincible.
If it wasn't just for play (with time limit), no one could beat her with any method.?

 The only way to beat it is timeout, but timeout is exclusive to spell cards and not to general battle, depending on interpretation.

Spoiler:
Not yet fully expanded ramblings: Fujiwara no Mokou also has an interesting card call ?possessed by phoenix? for, well, possessing people, and then there?s Yuugi Hoshiguma?s incredibly ambiguous power of control over supernatural phenomenon. Since a lot of your character's abilities play on the supernatural, this could give Yuugi quite an edge.

Well, let me see, seems like the OC needs more specific detailed explanations on his abilities ( or maybe I could just give him more power-ups  :derp:).

So yeah, Flandre has the ability to crush anything, and within your definition, she can crush spirits as well, yes? I don't think the OC needs a powerup up for this, I'll just assume the OC 'plays' with Flandre a bit, gets crushed and realizes that she's doing it with her hands and well, blow off her arm or  put her hand into the Labyrinth Accelerator device and warp her hands elsewhere in Gensokyo/universe while locking her wrists to the Labyrinth Accelerator (while pulling another one out from the Labyrinth Accelerator). I assume that it takes time for the 'eye' of the object/thing to get into her hands so... yeah. It'll take time before Flandre can crush him again. (But you'll probably say, "Well, what if the 'eye' of the object can go through the time rift that the Labyrinth Accelerator created?", I'll just assume the 'eye' energy doesn't perceive time rifts very well and takes the long way home when going to her hands. I'll also assume that the 'eye' is as light as gas and travels at the same speed of gas as well)

For Keine well, the moon thing might work if they're still in Gensokyo, but at the ends of the universe, don't think so.

Sakuya seems like a good opponent too, but all that stabbing might just break the orb that's kept inside his head and literally cause the universe to die in an explosion equivalent to 12 alternate universes. Also I didn't specify where was the orb too and thus, I've decided it should be in the middle of the head (and, heeeereeee comes a little power boost :derp:), and that the orb will break into 12 smaller pieces (automatically if penetration/serious damaged has occured to the brain) and spread throughout his brain. The damaged caused by the spreading will be healed and the orbs become even more fragile to Sakuya's stabbing.


Koishi's trick of making my OC subconsciously deny Gensokyo can be easily dealt with by synchronizing with his former self's subconscious and his by taking anything he's forgotten (or subconsciously closed his eyes upon) back into his mind.

Reimu's spell card has an interesting flaw with it. If she transcends reality, does that mean she transcend into a higher plane of reality or just move onto a different plane of reality (that makes her invincble)? Because if it's the latter, my OC could easily deal with her on her plane of reality (this shouldn't be a problem since he can traverse multiverses and what not). If it's the former, well, my OC might not be able to kill or hit her, but he can't die as well since he cannot die in any plane of reality.

Mokou can possess my character? Sure. Go ahead. If that happens, it's either the ghost calls in backup using the Labyrinth Accelerator and make the past/future selves synchronize with the posessed OC  (thus making her obtaining their subconscious and obtain his powers as well). But as soon as they synchronize, two things might happen:

1) Mokou's mind will be broken as there are now 3 subconsciousness in her mind and they're all fighting over to whoever gets control of the body. Seeing as how Mokou is still human-like in thinking, this will make her turn retarded.

2) Mokou's posession will be expelled from the OC's body and thus making her power ineffective. (As a sadistic way of ending it, after Mokou has been expelled, the OC can summon two more of his selves and half-synchronize Mokou on each side. This will result in an incomplete synchronization and will end up with the body's immune system fighting off the other bodies' immune systems. Mokou will also have her mind broken (but not as badly as she's half-synchronized with the two) and she will become frail and weak. It's just like an immortal having AIDS and schizo at the same time! :derp:)

One question about Yuugi, does her power reaches to spiritual planes as well? If it doesn't, it instantly makes her a dead target.

Shinki should be praised highly as I see. But my OC has traveled in other universes and killed other Gods, of course, Shinki would be no problem to deal with, unless she has an amazing power that none of the Gods this OC has killed.
I'll add something witty and amusing here later.

trancehime

  • 不聖女
  • *
  • 2017年~ 茨心R (希望)
    • himegimi
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #95 on: December 12, 2010, 02:14:43 PM »
For the uninformed, "LS" stands for Lecture Series, which is this board.

元素召唤 || pad & msl news translator robit
twitter xx motk resident whale

Iced Fairy

  • So like if you try to hurt alkaza
  • *
  • I will set you on fire k'?
    • Daisukima Dan Blog
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #96 on: December 12, 2010, 06:31:20 PM »
Anyways, I'd wondered how would the strongest of Gensokyo fight off such a person...I just need ideas to make it seem interesting
I'm afraid the only way you'll get an interesting story out of that is scrapping your OC.  Currently you're writing around him, instead of writing a story.  That will never be interesting.  Even if your story ends up being about several people from Gensoukyo teaming up to defeat a powerful threat, it should focus on the people from Gensoukyo and the teaming up juat as much as the threat.  And it should definitely be mostly from the viewpoints of the protagonists, not the villains.

Quote
(also, to be the first fanfiction in history to defeat a Mary Sue. :derp:)
The only way to defeat a Mary Sue is to make fun of them.  Making a Mary Sue the villian just means you have a boring Mary Sue villian.  And that never flies.  People won't bother reading it to see how he fails, they'll just write it off as a bad story and move on.

Really, given how stupidly overpowered Touhou characters are, I think it might be fair to say that if you make a character that can't be defeated by at least one of the exisiting cast members, you've probably gone too far.

I'd would suggest you take a step back and rexamine why you're writing, and think about whether people who don't start with an interest in your OC would want to read it.

capt. h

  • Only sane townie
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #97 on: December 12, 2010, 06:48:36 PM »
For the uninformed, "LS" stands for Lecture Series, which is this board.

I'd love to, but I don't have new topic power there.

Well, let me see, seems like the OC needs more specific detailed explanations on his abilities ( or maybe I could just give him more power-ups  :derp:).

So yeah, Flandre has the ability to crush anything, and within your definition, she can crush spirits as well, yes? I don't think the OC needs a powerup up for this, I'll just assume the OC 'plays' with Flandre a bit, gets crushed and realizes that she's doing it with her hands and well, blow off her arm or  put her hand into the Labyrinth Accelerator device and warp her hands elsewhere in Gensokyo/universe while locking her wrists to the Labyrinth Accelerator (while pulling another one out from the Labyrinth Accelerator). I assume that it takes time for the 'eye' of the object/thing to get into her hands so... yeah. It'll take time before Flandre can crush him again. (But you'll probably say, "Well, what if the 'eye' of the object can go through the time rift that the Labyrinth Accelerator created?", I'll just assume the 'eye' energy doesn't perceive time rifts very well and takes the long way home when going to her hands. I'll also assume that the 'eye' is as light as gas and travels at the same speed of gas as well)

For Keine well, the moon thing might work if they're still in Gensokyo, but at the ends of the universe, don't think so.

Sakuya seems like a good opponent too, but all that stabbing might just break the orb that's kept inside his head and literally cause the universe to die in an explosion equivalent to 12 alternate universes. Also I didn't specify where was the orb too and thus, I've decided it should be in the middle of the head (and, heeeereeee comes a little power boost :derp:), and that the orb will break into 12 smaller pieces (automatically if penetration/serious damaged has occured to the brain) and spread throughout his brain. The damaged caused by the spreading will be healed and the orbs become even more fragile to Sakuya's stabbing.


Koishi's trick of making my OC subconsciously deny Gensokyo can be easily dealt with by synchronizing with his former self's subconscious and his by taking anything he's forgotten (or subconsciously closed his eyes upon) back into his mind.

Reimu's spell card has an interesting flaw with it. If she transcends reality, does that mean she transcend into a higher plane of reality or just move onto a different plane of reality (that makes her invincble)? Because if it's the latter, my OC could easily deal with her on her plane of reality (this shouldn't be a problem since he can traverse multiverses and what not). If it's the former, well, my OC might not be able to kill or hit her, but he can't die as well since he cannot die in any plane of reality.

Mokou can possess my character? Sure. Go ahead. If that happens, it's either the ghost calls in backup using the Labyrinth Accelerator and make the past/future selves synchronize with the posessed OC  (thus making her obtaining their subconscious and obtain his powers as well). But as soon as they synchronize, two things might happen:

1) Mokou's mind will be broken as there are now 3 subconsciousness in her mind and they're all fighting over to whoever gets control of the body. Seeing as how Mokou is still human-like in thinking, this will make her turn retarded.

2) Mokou's posession will be expelled from the OC's body and thus making her power ineffective. (As a sadistic way of ending it, after Mokou has been expelled, the OC can summon two more of his selves and half-synchronize Mokou on each side. This will result in an incomplete synchronization and will end up with the body's immune system fighting off the other bodies' immune systems. Mokou will also have her mind broken (but not as badly as she's half-synchronized with the two) and she will become frail and weak. It's just like an immortal having AIDS and schizo at the same time! :derp:)

One question about Yuugi, does her power reaches to spiritual planes as well? If it doesn't, it instantly makes her a dead target.

Shinki should be praised highly as I see. But my OC has traveled in other universes and killed other Gods, of course, Shinki would be no problem to deal with, unless she has an amazing power that none of the Gods this OC has killed.

Nice counter. I'm actually not sure what "supernatural phenomenon" is, but since there are lots of spirits in Gensokyo, and Yuugi lives in Hell, I would say yes. There are lots of oni, and the only two we've seen are extremely powerful even by Gensokyo standards but tend to care more about partying than fighting. (edit: Since another name for oni in Gensokyo is "supernatural phenomenon", it might be another way of saying that she rules the Oni. However, she also displays control over spirits and Youkai during her battle, when she continue to fight between the midboss and the end boss phase while summoning the stage spirits.) I don't think Keine would go to the end of the universe, if she could conceal her history to avoid it. She has an essential role to fulfill within Gensokyo that requires her not to fight the OC. And I'm not sure if Koishi could simply extend her ability a bit to make him subconsciously forget about some of his weapons, or affect the subconsciousness of the synchronized forms.

For now I select Yuyuko Saigyouji.

She has the power to kill anyone, and then manipulate the dead according to Perfect Memento in Strict Sense. In other words, total control over the spirit world. While she can not kill your character due to his immortality (canonically confirmed), this allows for three things:

1. She has total control over the omnipotent ghost being that serves as his power source.
2. She has total control over the dead gods he can summon, since that's her ability.
3. She has total control over the spirits of his weapons, since we now confirmed that everything he owns is spirits.

I'm afraid the only way you'll get an interesting story out of that is scrapping your OC.  Currently you're writing around him, instead of writing a story.  That will never be interesting.  Even if your story ends up being about several people from Gensoukyo teaming up to defeat a powerful threat, it should focus on the people from Gensoukyo and the teaming up juat as much as the threat.  And it should definitely be mostly from the viewpoints of the protagonists, not the villains.
The only way to defeat a Mary Sue is to make fun of them.  Making a Mary Sue the villian just means you have a boring Mary Sue villian.  And that never flies.  People won't bother reading it to see how he fails, they'll just write it off as a bad story and move on.

Really, given how stupidly overpowered Touhou characters are, I think it might be fair to say that if you make a character that can't be defeated by at least one of the exisiting cast members, you've probably gone too far.

I'd would suggest you take a step back and rexamine why you're writing, and think about whether people who don't start with an interest in your OC would want to read it.

I mostly agree with this philosophy, but I'm kinda curious about whether an OC can be too powerful for Touhou. I would find a story examining whether there exists an OC that can break the touhou verse at its best exists. But if it were me, I would need a second author; one to maximize the OC while there other maximizes touhou. In other words, I find this discussion itself would make an interesting story, more so than the story itself.
« Last Edit: December 12, 2010, 07:21:02 PM by capt. h »

Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #98 on: December 12, 2010, 06:51:58 PM »
This is the best discussion ever. Every post since Kuroi needs to be LSed.
:moogy:

[ruro]Guys. Drop the mockery. Now. Not gonna ask nicely again.[/ruro]
« Last Edit: December 12, 2010, 08:08:21 PM by Ibaruro Kasen »

Kuroi

  • I dodge bans and don't afraid of anything
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #99 on: December 13, 2010, 02:21:46 AM »
I'm afraid the only way you'll get an interesting story out of that is scrapping your OC.  Currently you're writing around him, instead of writing a story.  That will never be interesting.  Even if your story ends up being about several people from Gensoukyo teaming up to defeat a powerful threat, it should focus on the people from Gensoukyo and the teaming up juat as much as the threat.  And it should definitely be mostly from the viewpoints of the protagonists, not the villains.
The only way to defeat a Mary Sue is to make fun of them.  Making a Mary Sue the villian just means you have a boring Mary Sue villian.  And that never flies.  People won't bother reading it to see how he fails, they'll just write it off as a bad story and move on.

Really, given how stupidly overpowered Touhou characters are, I think it might be fair to say that if you make a character that can't be defeated by at least one of the exisiting cast members, you've probably gone too far.

I'd would suggest you take a step back and rexamine why you're writing, and think about whether people who don't start with an interest in your OC would want to read it.

Well, I really didn't plan writing a story on it (haven't been writing fiction for years other than the ones in school tests...). It just seemed like a fun idea to get my brain juices flowing (also I keep imagining the scenes in my head as an anime, so it doesn't really work well in written form). :]

At first I thought that 'Hey this could actually...' and then when I came to the idea of 'Labyrinth Accelerator and summoning dead gods', I went 'Maybe not'.  :derp:


Nice counter. I'm actually not sure what "supernatural phenomenon" is, but since there are lots of spirits in Gensokyo, and Yuugi lives in Hell, I would say yes. There are lots of oni, and the only two we've seen are extremely powerful even by Gensokyo standards but tend to care more about partying than fighting. (edit: Since another name for oni in Gensokyo is "supernatural phenomenon", it might be another way of saying that she rules the Oni. However, she also displays control over spirits and Youkai during her battle, when she continue to fight between the midboss and the end boss phase while summoning the stage spirits.) I don't think Keine would go to the end of the universe, if she could conceal her history to avoid it. She has an essential role to fulfill within Gensokyo that requires her not to fight the OC. And I'm not sure if Koishi could simply extend her ability a bit to make him subconsciously forget about some of his weapons, or affect the subconsciousness of the synchronized forms.

For now I select Yuyuko Saigyouji.

She has the power to kill anyone, and then manipulate the dead according to Perfect Memento in Strict Sense. In other words, total control over the spirit world. While she can not kill your character due to his immortality (canonically confirmed), this allows for three things:

1. She has total control over the omnipotent ghost being that serves as his power source.
2. She has total control over the dead gods he can summon, since that's her ability.
3. She has total control over the spirits of his weapons, since we now confirmed that everything he owns is spirits.



I almost wanted to give in, but then I thought.... Okay, Yuyuko can control ghosts, but can she control omnipotent ghosts? There's a reason why it's omnipotent. Also, let's assume everything this OC has is otherworldly/universely-unparallel in composition. Okay, so yes, they might call it a 'ghost', but it since (assuming that) the things he have are all from alternate universes, surely the general composition of these ghosts are well, not the same, thus, not matching Yuyuko's criteria of complete dominance over them.

I don't know about controlling dead gods tho, since if he actually summons them from the dead, they are then in the same plane of reality with all the other characters. I guess they can be controlled by Yuyuko since the dead deities have synchronized within the plain through the OC's powers, but then, he can just synchronize half of them and try to overtake the domination influence on the dead gods using the omnipotent ghost's abilities.

And since it's called the 'supernatural', I'm guessing it's control over something natural only in ambiguous and exaggerated form, yes? He can still counterattack them still...

And you do know I'm just gonna counter whatever you say since there's no logic in what we're talking about right? :derp: The Touhou characters, despite being batshit insane in terms of power level, will eventually reach their limit as you try to maximize their powers. Also, I see a lack of technique when you're answering me - you don't use much distinctions of tactic when you say their powers. Actually, you're just pretty much telling me their powers but you're telling me how are they gonna counter one of my OC's powers. (The only noticeable ones I've seen are Keine and Koishi) I can just maximize my character since he has no definition of a base power and all the ' ALTERNATE UNIVERSES HURRR' talk and definitions are generally gonna fuck up the whole entire discussion/debate. It's fun doing these once in awhile tho.  :V

Quote
I mostly agree with this philosophy, but I'm kinda curious about whether an OC can be too powerful for Touhou. I would find a story examining whether there exists an OC that can break the touhou verse at its best exists. But if it were me, I would need a second author; one to maximize the OC while there other maximizes touhou. In other words, I find this discussion itself would make an interesting story, more so than the story itself.

I find it interesting too. :V

I also thought that I might give this plot a chance if no one in Gensokyo gets to defeat him (HAHAHAHA, okay, bad joke...)

Anyway, in this discussion I've found a somewhat another plot about Touhou fiction.

Story #1:
Spoiler:
I thought of making a story about ZUN and that he never really got a chance to make Touhou 13. Then as the story progresses, I thought of making my character go and after a chain of events, become friends with ZUN. Then the story details about their living lives, about their hopes and dreams of what Touhou 13 COULD have been. I'm trying to make it sound like a Touhou version of Mitch Albom's works (the guy's such a wonderful writer!). And in the end, ZUN dies and finally, after a few long weeks of depression and speculation, my character dies. As he is dead, he then... ( I might actually put the end if I make it :V)
I'll add something witty and amusing here later.

Ryuu

  • time for kittyrina lessons
  • time to press r again
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #100 on: December 13, 2010, 02:47:07 AM »
(also I keep imagining the scenes in my head as an anime, so it doesn't really work well in written form).

everything I've ever written would like to have a word with you

http://ryuukyunplaysstuff.tumblr.com/ read about me playing league i guess

capt. h

  • Only sane townie
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #101 on: December 13, 2010, 03:48:28 AM »

I almost wanted to give in, but then I thought.... Okay, Yuyuko can control ghosts, but can she control omnipotent ghosts? There's a reason why it's omnipotent. Also, let's assume everything this OC has is otherworldly/universely-unparallel in composition. Okay, so yes, they might call it a 'ghost', but it since (assuming that) the things he have are all from alternate universes, surely the general composition of these ghosts are well, not the same, thus, not matching Yuyuko's criteria of complete dominance over them.

I don't know about controlling dead gods tho, since if he actually summons them from the dead, they are then in the same plane of reality with all the other characters. I guess they can be controlled by Yuyuko since the dead deities have synchronized within the plain through the OC's powers, but then, he can just synchronize half of them and try to overtake the domination influence on the dead gods using the omnipotent ghost's abilities.

And since it's called the 'supernatural', I'm guessing it's control over something natural only in ambiguous and exaggerated form, yes? He can still counterattack them still...

And you do know I'm just gonna counter whatever you say since there's no logic in what we're talking about right? :derp: The Touhou characters, despite being batshit insane in terms of power level, will eventually reach their limit as you try to maximize their powers. Also, I see a lack of technique when you're answering me - you don't use much distinctions of tactic when you say their powers. Actually, you're just pretty much telling me their powers but you're telling me how are they gonna counter one of my OC's powers. (The only noticeable ones I've seen are Keine and Koishi) I can just maximize my character since he has no definition of a base power and all the ' ALTERNATE UNIVERSES HURRR' talk and definitions are generally gonna fuck up the whole entire discussion/debate. It's fun doing these once in awhile tho.  :V

I find it interesting too. :V

I also thought that I might give this plot a chance if no one in Gensokyo gets to defeat him (HAHAHAHA, okay, bad joke...)

Anyway, in this discussion I've found a somewhat another plot about Touhou fiction.

Story #1:
Spoiler:
I thought of making a story about ZUN and that he never really got a chance to make Touhou 13. Then as the story progresses, I thought of making my character go and after a chain of events, become friends with ZUN. Then the story details about their living lives, about their hopes and dreams of what Touhou 13 COULD have been. I'm trying to make it sound like a Touhou version of Mitch Albom's works (the guy's such a wonderful writer!). And in the end, ZUN dies and finally, after a few long weeks of depression and speculation, my character dies. As he is dead, he then... ( I might actually put the end if I make it :V)
If you say that a power doesn't work on your character simply because you don't want it to, I'm going to disagree. There are many, many "alternate universes" within the touhou verse, and I assume that your character is from an alternate universe that exists. Therefore, a diety is a touhou diety and a ghost is a touhou ghost, regardless of which alternate touhou realm he comes from. Furthermore, since the powers of touhou are absolute, I do believe that your ghost is in fact a ghost, and Yuyuko has total power to manipulate the dead, it can be manipulated by Yuyuko.

However, I still have a few characters I can use. I'm assuming that this guy has a lot of sins to account for, so I propose Shikieiki Yamaxanadu, judge of the dead. Everyone who has ever died has been either judged by a Yama, or has defeated their shinigami. However, the judges should suffice.

One of Shikieiki's explicit abilities is to beat people with the weight of their own sins. Taken completely literally, this would be the combined weight of the universes that were destroyed, but even non-literally in the OC's case, it will hurt due to the countless people/gods/universes he has taken out. Note that the sins are determined purely by the yama's discretion. It also indicates that Shikieiki is at least strong enough to hold the rod. Another ability she weilds lets her summon danmaku from hell, to simply power her way through any confrontation.

Her power is to cast judgement, and execute this judgement, on anyone who appears before her. She is very good at her job and, if she judges the character to be in sin, she will simply judge that he should go to hell.

While your character has the power of pocket dimensions embedded in his skull, and is really good at sending people to other plains of existence, Shikieiki
does this hundreds if not thousands of times a day. Hell is her version of your pocket dimension in which her judgments are absolute, her power unquestionable, her decisions final. And you don't have to be dead to be sent to hell in touhou. (note that there are many hells in touhou; I am not referencing the former hell).

I'm not specific for a reason; if I get specific, then I would be limiting the power of the characters I mention. Some of the powers of touhou characters are inherently limitless. Sure, give your character control over multiple universes; but if Remilia says something won't happen, it won't and if Sakuya stops your time it's stopped. Part of the reason immortality even can exist is because the immortals still die; otherwise they would be in contradiction with Yuyuko's absolute control over death.

EDIT: I guess I can use a tactic: Remilia fates that the OC's time is stopped by Sakuya. Sakuya stops the time. On the full moon, Keine erases the OC while his time is still stopped.
« Last Edit: December 13, 2010, 03:52:49 AM by capt. h »

Bias Bus

  • It's unpleasent
  • *
  • if you're better than me
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #102 on: December 13, 2010, 05:49:25 AM »
Touhou - Phantasmagoria of the Poor Man's Cubicle

Meet Yamada Mochizuka.

One of the fresh new employees to begin work at the Yamaxandu branch of the immense corperation known as Higan Inc. This was the largest and busiest businesses in all of Gensokyo, having many different branches that are all tied to the same purpose, and all follow the order of the head honcho who resides at the core of the company, the Enma-o Branch. The hours are long, but it pays well in both money and character. Yamada himself is no one special, he's a fairly average guy fresh out of college and now set to begin his career in the work force by working a somewhat hum drum life at a desk job within the office of the Yamaxandu Branch. He doesn't quite understand what they really do but he knows it involves 'dealing with records regarding those dearly departed'.

Seems simple enough, yes?

It would be had it not been for the fact that he was the only human working alongside a cornicopia of youkai and other supernatural creatures of mythology. Many of these including, but not limited to a cat-girl janitor who's an implied necrophiliac, the supervisor who is also the grim reaper that
Spoiler:
reaped the soul of your cat 'Mr. Puffnstuff'
...and a boss who has the ultimate say in whether your immortal soul goes to either heaven, hell or is reincarnated for a second chance at life.

...Yeah, today's going to be pretty swell, itsn't it Yamada?

"...Maybe I should get another jo-?"

Of course it is! You gotta job at the most respected(?) company in all of Gensokyo. It's importance spanning just as far as the concept of death can reach. Think about it, if you work hard and please the boss, you could get promoted to being a 'Shinigami'!

Everyone likes Prrrrromotions!

Oh and try not to die; as strange as it sounds, these guys don't give you life insurance.

"... :ohdear:"

(...I had way too much fun with writing this...)
No Math Zone - Tumblr (slight nsfw) | Legend of a Hot-Blooded Pig

"The only guy you know to draw fat Touhous." - Erebus

capt. h

  • Only sane townie
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #103 on: December 13, 2010, 02:46:15 PM »
I loves this idea. If you do this, will they be competing with Borders Incorporated?

Many of these including, but not limited to a cat-girl janitor who's an implied necrophiliac, the supervisor who is also the grim reaper that
Spoiler:
reaped the soul of your cat 'Mr. Puffnstuff'
...and a boss who has the ultimate say in whether your immortal soul goes to either heaven, hell or is reincarnated for a second chance at life.

Spoiler:
NOOOO! NOT MR. PUFFNSTUFF!

Keep the janitor away from him!
  :ohdear:
« Last Edit: December 13, 2010, 02:51:03 PM by capt. h »

Bias Bus

  • It's unpleasent
  • *
  • if you're better than me
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #104 on: December 13, 2010, 04:02:34 PM »
Probably. This was just an idea I got due to seeing a fair amount of shows focusing on life in the office or has something pretaining to that. I do plan on writing it sometime in the near future being I want to see how this sorta thing will work out.

It seems like it'll be alot of fun given how much of a blast I had just writing out that summary :V
No Math Zone - Tumblr (slight nsfw) | Legend of a Hot-Blooded Pig

"The only guy you know to draw fat Touhous." - Erebus

capt. h

  • Only sane townie
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #105 on: December 15, 2010, 11:47:09 PM »
I'm working on a pokemon-touhou crossover, and I think it's going to be pretty good from the point of view of touhou fans.

However, Pokemon fans will cry foul on a lot of counts. For one, I tend to make assumptions about my audience for the sake of pacing, so things that are obvious to a fan of one might seem sudden and without warning to a fan of the other. Such as pokemon descriptions and details about the character's appearances. I need a strategy for when I introduce characters and pokemon.

This leads to the more pressing concern - the characters I'm using, Mokou and Cirno, could quickly become Mary Sues in the pokemon world. They have powers that no other trainer has. Now, there are a lot of fashion victims in pokemon so I might be able to hand wave their appearance. But since they do have supernatural abilities, I need some strategies to make those supernatural abilities known without the pokemon fans justifiably hating the characters. Or I need to make the characters likable/interesting to a pokemon fan, rather than having the characters appear to be self inserts that the author gives new powers without warning, like ice and immortality.

If neither of those options work, I at least need to give the fans of the pokemon side something they would want to read. Suggestions?

Moerin

  • What's punk? It's an explosion of suppressed dissatisfaction.
  • It's the roar of the soul!
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #106 on: December 16, 2010, 07:26:05 PM »
Bare in mind, Bruno
Spars with Pokemon that can
Break mountains in half.

And Sabrina has
Powerful psychic... Powers.
Supernatural

Abilities should
Not seem too farfetch'd, but you
Could always nerf them

A little if you
Really think they'd be too strong.
Just... Bare that in mind.
The solution to all of life's problems!

#1 Rin Satsuki Fan~♥
"For hearts long lost and full of fright, for those alone in blackest night, accept our ring and join our fight... Love Conquers All -  with violet light!"

capt. h

  • Only sane townie
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #107 on: December 22, 2010, 01:04:06 AM »
Bare in mind, Bruno
Spars with Pokemon that can
Break mountains in half.

And Sabrina has
Powerful psychic... Powers.
Supernatural

Abilities should
Not seem too farfetch'd, but you
Could always nerf them

A little if you
Really think they'd be too strong.
Just... Bare that in mind.

I bore it in mind, and I found a direction to take that idea.

Spoiler:
Trainers in pokemon are really tough.

I think I could use some title ideas since everyone who has commented assumed the story would be so bad it's good, and were surprised when it was just plain good. But I think I have a direction for the story now.

EDIT: thanks for the inspiration.
« Last Edit: December 22, 2010, 01:21:32 AM by capt. h »

Smallfry

  • Life.....Death.....
  • I own it all
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #108 on: January 05, 2011, 05:31:28 AM »
Maybe I'll do a more comical retelling of some of the games?
SOMETIMES YA DON'T NEED TO BE FASTER THAN THE BEAR, JUST FASTER THAN THE GUY NEXT TO YA

capt. h

  • Only sane townie
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #109 on: January 10, 2011, 09:33:30 PM »
How do you guys decide on chapter order and whether or not to release chapters?

Right now I'm several chapters ahead in one of my stories, but I might not be able to release them yet because if I mess up the chronology, I can't go back and fix it. I'm trying to decide whether I should release the chapters or not, so I'm curious how most you guys decide whether the chapter should be released, or if you need another one before it?

Alfred F. Jones

  • Estamos orgullosos del Batall?n Lincoln
  • *
  • y de la lucha que hizo por Madrid
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #110 on: January 10, 2011, 10:03:35 PM »
Right now I'm several chapters ahead in one of my stories, but I might not be able to release them yet because if I mess up the chronology, I can't go back and fix it. I'm trying to decide whether I should release the chapters or not, so I'm curious how most you guys decide whether the chapter should be released, or if you need another one before it?
This rarely happens because I'm such a lazy ass of a writer that I update as I go and never have chapters in reserve for later release.

There has been one exception: the intermission in the first part of White Rose, which was written in a separate document because it kept coming to my mind and wouldn't let me work on the actual timeline, but at the same time I kept because I thought it could be useful later. When I finally got to the part where that work became the intermission, I just posted good-sized chunks of it every Wednesday until I ran out and started looking like a lazy writer again.

As for messing up the chronology, worry about that later. You can always fix it with the help of readers, who generally love pointing out how you've ruined everything by including such and such and scrutinizing your rushed work too closely. BV

Or on the other hand, anachronistic order is sometimes useful for throwing off readers, making them expect things that you'll eventually twist when you fill in the blanks.

Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #111 on: January 10, 2011, 10:30:36 PM »
Anyone available for beta-reading? I've actually finished the latest chapter of Different Story of an Eastern Wonderland. :V

capt. h

  • Only sane townie
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #112 on: January 21, 2011, 04:55:11 AM »
Something I notice about Yukari stories is that Yukari is pretty much able to do whatever she wants. Because her ability is extended to conceptual boundaries rather than just physical ones, she is the ultimate source of Deus ex Machina in touhou. Since she can do literally anything, anything that she can't do becomes a plot hole in her stories, on top of the fact that the mere existence of a character that can nullify the actions of all the other characters combined can really break stories. It makes her very, very hard to use well.

So I'm rather curious how to do Yukari well. My solution to the problem is in my backstories fic in my sig, but the short answer is that I limit her to boundaries that exist on that assumption that things that don't exist can't be manipulated. However, I am the only person who uses this limitation that I'm aware of, so I'm curious how other writers that use Yukari approach the Yukari problem.

capt. h

  • Only sane townie
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #113 on: January 26, 2011, 08:35:48 PM »
I made a pretty big mistake in one of my stories, Shoot the Moon.

Two things: even if you're treating Yatagarasu and Amaterasu as one and the same, Amaterasu is female. Second, I'm finding it REALLY hard to believe that any organization can be as idiotic as the "military" in this story, so I'm just going to chalk this story up as being absurdism and move on.

http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php?action=post;quote=537293;topic=8141.30

The problem is, the military in my story was supposed to be average, not stupid. I didn't even notice how bad I was doing it. I need to revise my story quite a bit, but I don't really know what I did wrong. Where did I mess up?

Bias Bus

  • It's unpleasent
  • *
  • if you're better than me
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #114 on: January 26, 2011, 08:53:51 PM »
Something I notice about Yukari stories is that Yukari is pretty much able to do whatever she wants. Because her ability is extended to conceptual boundaries rather than just physical ones, she is the ultimate source of Deus ex Machina in touhou. Since she can do literally anything, anything that she can't do becomes a plot hole in her stories, on top of the fact that the mere existence of a character that can nullify the actions of all the other characters combined can really break stories. It makes her very, very hard to use well.

So I'm rather curious how to do Yukari well. My solution to the problem is in my backstories fic in my sig, but the short answer is that I limit her to boundaries that exist on that assumption that things that don't exist can't be manipulated. However, I am the only person who uses this limitation that I'm aware of, so I'm curious how other writers that use Yukari approach the Yukari problem.
For me, the times I used Yukari were in the fact that she wasn't outwardly involved in the story or generally didn't seem to do much to fix a problem that arose in the story. Like in Primordial Black Pudding (my first WWC entry), Yukari
Spoiler:
knows about the Black Pudding and states that she knows someone who can kill the eldritch mass but doesn't get off her ass to do anything as that same solution will fix the problem on it's own. Cue appearance of Orange.


For an idea pretaining to the "alternate gensokyo" I'm working on, Yukari is a hibernating eldritch colossus that slumbers within an alternate void known as "Yukarispace" (need a better name for this). 'Yukari' hasn't been seen for eons and the only time she's known to even remind the people of her existance is when "dimensional quakes" start occuring in Gensokyo which opens "gaps" for entry into Yukarispace in various locations in Gensokyo. The gaps close after a day or two and usually the abnormality between dimensions that was caused by the quake is restored to normal once the gap closes. To the people who worship Yukari as an Elder God, the dimensional quakes occur because Yukari is "snoring".

Basically, my solution to the Yukari Problem is that she usually never plays too big a role or I put her in a position where she isn't really active or mobile (like the above), and is (again) unlikely to play a big role in the story.

Course, this is just my method for dealing with things...
« Last Edit: January 26, 2011, 09:10:11 PM by Tere Ingrabus »
No Math Zone - Tumblr (slight nsfw) | Legend of a Hot-Blooded Pig

"The only guy you know to draw fat Touhous." - Erebus

Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #115 on: January 27, 2011, 08:40:55 PM »
My take on Yukari is that 1. she's too lazy to Instantly Solve Stuff, and 2. it's much more fun to watch the heroines scamper around so enthusiastically. Except, of course, in cases of really serious things like someone going out of their way to break the Spell Card rules or trying to outright threaten Gensokyo, or when she's the one starting things to begin with (i.e. Silent Sinner in blue), or she's just bored (see: the fighting games).

Conqueror

  • Here I am, dirty and faceless
  • waiting to heed your instruction
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #116 on: February 02, 2011, 10:06:33 PM »
The (slightly silly) premise:
People have stopped believing in themselves and have become disillusioned with real world, preferring to escape into fantasy and fiction. Meanwhile, Touhou's explosive popularity has spread worldwide and has become one of the prime destinations for escapist fantasy. The result? The border between Gensokyo and the human world has been blurred, and humans and outside technology are now finding their way into Gensokyo even as youkai escape from Gensokyo to wreak more havoc upon the human world, continuing the cycle of chaos.

With this in the background, Youmu wakes up one day to find an irremovable tattoo mysteriously etched into her forearm, reading "Saber." An incident! She gets an inexplicable urge to go out and investigate, although she doesn't have any real direction or purpose. Upon going out, she finds that the human village has somehow become..."different." Meanwhile, she also discovers, to her horror, that the spell card rules are no longer in place - the laws keeping humans and youkai from killing each other in fights don't exist anymore. Power levels and caps have been lifted. Chaos and uncertainty reigns in the air, and in the meantime some regain the ability to manipulate powers they were never able to fully use before.

Basically it's free-for-all time in Gensokyo, and we have multiple warring factions, a lot of Touhous just wandering around wondering what's going on, and of course a vast conspiracy that threatens to destroy the balance of power in Gensokyo. Features 6 other characters with mysterious tattoos, a mysterious cartel with members nicknamed after the seven deadly sins, and most of the characters from EoSD to SA. Poor humans, it seems most of them will get stuck in the crossfire and die.



Unfortunately judging from my completion rate for other stories and such I will probably never get this written up. But I've had the plot planned out for months now and I figured I might as well toss this up in here to give myself some motivation.


On tue un homme, on est un assassin. On tue des millions d'hommes, on est un conqu?rant. On les tue tous, on est un dieu.
Every saint has a past and every sinner a future.

Alfred F. Jones

  • Estamos orgullosos del Batall?n Lincoln
  • *
  • y de la lucha que hizo por Madrid
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #117 on: February 02, 2011, 10:45:21 PM »
People have stopped believing in themselves and have become disillusioned with real world, preferring to escape into fantasy and fiction. Meanwhile, Touhou's explosive popularity has spread worldwide and has become one of the prime destinations for escapist fantasy. The result? The border between Gensokyo and the human world has been blurred, and humans and outside technology are now finding their way into Gensokyo even as youkai escape from Gensokyo to wreak more havoc upon the human world, continuing the cycle of chaos.
Slightly silly or not, this is probably the best excuse for merging the human world and Gensokyo I've heard in a while, especially since it sticks to Gensokyo's mechanic of running on disbelief (unless you're an iPod, apparently).

It's a bit of an F/SN crossover, I see, but this has so much potential to explore the consequences of a merge between the worlds that I implore you to not just go down the well-trod path of the usual crossover, and instead look around and see what else you can do with a plot like that. It's a very intriguing premise, so don't just limit yourself to parody.

Conqueror

  • Here I am, dirty and faceless
  • waiting to heed your instruction
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #118 on: February 03, 2011, 07:17:54 AM »
Actually, the story was originally conceived as a "bit of everything crossover" where I stole a bunch of ideas from various works of fiction and mushed them together to create a literary mess. But over time I was able to flesh out the story with my own ideas and scrap the "borrowed" parts that didn't really fit in with the rest of the story. So a lot of the parody aspects I had in the beginning have been replaced with actual story elements, yay!

Just to give an idea of how this came about, I started out with a Battle-Royale style Gensokyo brawl, but scrapped that in favor of just a general conflict because it was too hard to plan out. I then merged this with a separate thought experiment where I chose the Touhou characters that would embody each of the seven sins (and over time these characterizations have morphed as well). Then I merged that with the F/SN style crossover (no grail though), and I threw in the plot of another short story I had also planned but never written, etc.

Exploring the merge between the two worlds is an interesting idea; I had never really thought much about it, as I had conceived the merge mostly as a plot catalyst. But I'll look at it and see if I can find more ideas coming from that direction (maybe I can merge in my "Gensokyo takes over the real world" outline, ha), as it looks like a promising gold mine of ideas. Right now my story is mainly driven by 1)  character flaws and motivations leading to conflict and 2) the general atmosphere of suspicion and chaos created by the incident.

Anyway, thanks for the feedback!
« Last Edit: February 03, 2011, 07:19:54 AM by Conqueror »


On tue un homme, on est un assassin. On tue des millions d'hommes, on est un conqu?rant. On les tue tous, on est un dieu.
Every saint has a past and every sinner a future.

MaxKnight

  • Youkai of the River
  • No, not that River
Re: Aya's Writing Workshop - Bring us your story ideas and outlines!
« Reply #119 on: February 03, 2011, 05:53:45 PM »
So I hear this is a thread where I can post an outline of a story idea and get opinions on direction and whatnot.  I don't actually have an outline prepared, as I never wrote one up for Adaptation and associated stories, but a thought occurs to me that I need an opinion on something; more specifically, on how far to take The Other Side.

You see, Adaptation only goes from Alice's first fight in Mystic Square through her fight in Perfect Cherry Blossom; it was as far as was needed to go to write about Alice's adaptation to life in Gensokyo and her acceptance from others of being a youkai rather than a human like they all thought.  This wouldn't normally be a problem other than the fact that I have ideas that stretch to further than UFO.  My biggest question being whether I should make The Other Side: An Adaptation Story end at the aftermath of Perfect Cherry Blossom and be continued in a separate story, or if it should continue past and encompass all of the other ideas I had in the same continuity within the same story.  This will also help me in putting an outline together for The Other Side, since it will tell me where I can stop.

As for a basic idea of how my mind has laid this out: this particular story kind of goes in an every other sort of way.  It starts with the events of Mystic Square and the next chapter tells of important events that transpire after that.  The next planned chapter will explore what happens during Embodiment of Scarlet Devil, followed by an aftermath chapter that leads up to, what else, a Perfect Cherry Blossom chapter.  In my mind it just keeps going back and forth, and for the events that encompass it it feeds off of what's already written in Adaptation to make the two stories work together and be expanded upon.  If I go beyond, I have ideas for things that will happen during and after IN, something taking place while PoFV is happening (but not actually the events of the game, for once; that will be more or less explained after the fact, not to mention it will make a certain lecture happen)... it just keeps going.  A major event would take place between SA and UFO (would be hinted at right towards the end of the SA chapter), and I'll likely tailor the effects of that event into UFO itself (this would potentially differ things greatly from at the least some of the canon exchanges that I've more or less tried to keep closer to as of yet).

And of course, I'd try to keep things as close to canon as reasonable, avoiding as many dumb clich?s and memes as I can.  This will be evidenced by the next chapter I write, where I break most common conventions regarding EoSD characters.  I've honestly talked too much here, and don't want to completely ruin things by talking more (if given enough leeway, I'd reveal darn near everything that I've thought up all at once and nothing will be left to be surprised about when it actually gets written).