This is the 9th thread dedicated to the recording of failures at playing Touhou.

[Chaotic Phoenixma]

Not a failure, but this is the closest topic.

Finally captured Satori's Recollection "Return Inanimateness" on Lunatic

The game crashed. The capture didn't go into my spell record.

Also, Recollection "Spring Kyoto Dolls" just keeps messing me up when trying to capture it.

[Sir Namington]

http://replays.gensokyou.org/download.php?id=11129

Holy crap. So close. So far. Kokkuri-san's Contract is as confusing as I thought it looked. My first 2 or 3 deaths were annoyingly avoidable. That definitely held this attempt back.

[チソウ タイゼン]

hay it's been a while since I even touched pcb

I wonder if I can clear shikigami ran now

oh crap I suck at phantasm now what'll I do

ah, let's play the extra stage instead

wait

what

why do i suck here now too

whyyyy ;-;

[Schezo]

Did I really just game over on Yuyuko's 4th easier than fuck nonspell!?  With 3 bombs in stock? What?!

[チソウ タイゼン]

ASS

what is up with this game's hitboxes
EOSD isn't even that hard

[ふねん1]

I finally get another PCB Extra perfect attempt up to Kokkuri-san's Contract.

My finger accidentally taps the bomb key as I bring it back to my keyboard.

Of all things...

[チソウ タイゼン]

So, drawing inspiration from a recent post in the Accomplishments thread, I decided I'd vie for an Easy 1CC on SA.

Near-perfect Satori fight and reasonable lives upon entry to Stage 6.
Okay, looks good.


Game over on Utsuho's third nonspell.



:I

It brings me great shame to find that I cannot best this game on Easy

[ebarrett]

I cannot

try again

that's all there is to it, really

this works all the way up to lunatic and beyond

[Naut]

try again

that's all there is to it, really

this works all the way up to lunatic and beyond

Quoted for emphasis. Listen to this man.

[Sir Namington]

PCB extra failure time again!

http://replays.gensokyou.org/download.php?id=11173

Why do I even bother.

That's just my BEST attempt. Here's a more typical attempt. It sucks:

http://replays.gensokyou.org/download.php?id=11174

My history:

Oni Sign "Blue Oni Red Oni" - 20/46
Oni Sign "Soaring Guardian God" - 12/42
Shikigami "Wizard Fox Thoughts" - 34/37
Shikigami "Banquet of 12 General Gods" - 0/37 (I always border break to nullify that first wave)
Radiance "Fox-Tanuki Youkai Laser" - 12/35
Radiance "Charming Seige from All Sides" - 7/34
Radiance "Princess Tenko -Illusion-" - 3/21
Shikigami's Shot "Ultimate Buddhist" - 2/24
Shikigami's Shot "Unilateral Contact" - 0/15
Shikigami "Chen" - 0/9
"Kokkuri-sans Contract" - 0/6
Illusion God "Descent of Izuna Gongen" - 0/1

Time played: 58:31.

This seems to indicate I've put 13 hours in the Extra stage alone. I don't get how this is even possible.

Total attempts: 251

Times retried: 179

Of all my retires, 95% consist of me dying some time before the midboss. I know how that part of the stage goes, I just suck a lot at it

I am the benchmark for terrible players. Some should compare themselves to me before saying they're bad.

[ふねん1]

But you did get to Izuna Gongen. I wouldn't call that terrible.

And don't worry about time. Take as long as you need to practice this stuff, and anything else for that matter. None of us here will call you out over how long it takes you to do something.

To stay on topic: God I suck at collecting UFOs. Never had more than a few lives throughout the whole attempt, especially after derping [i[twice[/i] on midboss-Ichirin's nonspell . And of course I gameovered on Shou.

[Sir Namington]

I wasn't afraid of being "called out" or anything. I just feel like I'm hitting my head against a wall. I progress too slowly for my own tastes. Oh well, I'm tired of bitching for now.

[Naut]

[22:43:10]   <Naut>   ugh no miss stage 1,2,3 ufo, one miss stage 4, lose the rest of my lives to stage 5... time to stop

I'd like to stop losing all my lives on stage 5 plzkthx ufo

I'd much rather lose them on stage 6

[ふねん1]

I'd like to stop losing all my lives on stage 5 plzkthx ufo

ufo

Well there's your problem. :V

[Naut]

Wasn't collecting any, how could it be my problem?

:V

[Zengeku]

Wasn't collecting any, how could it be my problem?

:V

Because you didn't collect any.

[ふねん1]

Because you didn't collect any.

Thing is, collecting UFOs is a "damned if you do (everywhere, really), damned if you don't (last two stages)" situation, as I see it. Props to those who can do no UFO runs, not only for the skill, but for actually having the patience to do it.

EDIT: Starting to incorporate a few scoring techniques in SA. Get past Parsee just fine, Stage 3's stage portion done as I normally approach it for safety's sake.

Lose three straight lives to Yuugi for a game over.

[Zengeku]

Thing is, collecting UFOs is a "damned if you do (everywhere, really), damned if you don't (last two stages)" situation, as I see it. Props to those who can do no UFO runs, not only for the skill, but for actually having the patience to do it.

I only got two problems with UFO's.

- "Goddammit get back down here, i can't pick you up while you hover among the enemies. Get down here, no don't turn red now. I need you to be red when you get back here again."

- "Okay, pick up the red UFO and get another life. No!! Why'd you turn blue in the middle of everything. Goddammit".

And the occasional situation when UFO's are actually summoned but you don't manage to kill them and they drift off with all your items, bombs, life pieces whatever.

Oh and are you referring to accidentally picking up UFO's and thus wrecking your No-UFO challenge? Yeah, i can imagine that being annoying. Personally i'll just give props to them because they can clear UFO with Cave resources.

[Naut]

Personally i'll just give props to them because they can clear UFO with Cave resources.

346707925 bombs per life? I'm no bombing as well, so yeah.

[Zengeku]

346707925 bombs per life? I'm no bombing as well, so yeah.

Moo. DOJ hardly gives you any bombs. The original DDP though... you get more bombs there. And more bombs is more challenging than having more lives... given how often i die with a large bomb stock.

Good luck with your 4-lives no-bomb 1cc.
(How many lives does the game actually give you if you don't use UFO's?. You start with two extra lives and Nue drops one in Stage 4. Iirc the bosses drops a few life pieces, though not really sure.)

[RegalStar]

9 I believe.

[Naut]

Yeah, they drop nine life pieces, which gives you two extra lives. So you have two lives to start, plus three gained from bosses/Nue to make five total.

[CrimsonDX]

Loosing my last life on Okuu's final spell card on my easy mode 1cc. Died right as I started hearing the low life sound.... Good thing no one was up cause I screamed pretty loudly at the screen.... :ohdear:

It's all that stupid cats fault. I can just about get through the entire first 4 stages without loosing a single life (1 or 2 at most, usually on Satori), but stages 5 and 6 will take every single one of my extra lives and thats before I even get to that stupid radioactive birdbrain. I hate how the game forces you to restart a stage when you loose all of your lives. I can't beat stage 6 with the default number of lives so I can't even practice it. MoF and UFO weren't so bad. MoF I could pretty much go the entire game until Kanako pretty much miss free and her last spell card is the only one that REALLY gives me trouble so I usually have plenty of lives to spare on it. UFO I pretty much got super lucky. I've yet to be able to replicate being able to beat Hijiri without a single miss, but even that game I would still have plenty of lives left for her.

But Okuu...That final spell card is just evil. Bullets coming from both sides AND you being drawn into the center. Not to mention her card before that is pretty much just as hard. It took me months just to be able to beat THAT card. Ugh...this game really pisses me off sometimes. It doesn't help that I can't even 1cc the games on normal and yet all you guys ever complain about is not being able to complete your bizzare lunatic level no vert, no focus, no miss, no bomb, pacifist runs with you hands tied behind your back (gross exaggeration I know, but still)

Sorry, rant over.

[Jaimers]

Tried this no UFO's 1cc thing for the lulz.

Got all the way to Byakuren. I then game over because I apparently forgot how to do Magic Butterfly.  :X

[MTSranger]

It's all that stupid cats fault. I can just about get through the entire first 4 stages without loosing a single life (1 or 2 at most, usually on Satori), but stages 5 and 6 will take every single one of my extra lives and thats before I even get to that stupid radioactive birdbrain.

it happened to me too when I was still trying to 1cc normal mode...
Enter Orin with 9 lives, came out with 4, then just proceed to blow all of them away at Okuu for some reason.
Can't believe how much I raged.

The only way I see is to practice stage 5 to death...
like memorize the stage (spawn points of orbs, where not to shoot, gap abuse, planned bombs, etc)
and like fight orin to death (50+ times or something), with many planned bomb if necessary.

But Okuu...That final spell card is just evil. Bullets coming from both sides AND you being drawn into the center.

Get into a fixed tapping pattern (like right/left, down x3, repeat) when on that card so that you only have to focus on dodging the small dots from above.

Apparently the difficult of that card doesn't increase very much from normal to lunatic,
and I think that's why everybody is saying it's loleasy when it might hard for others.

[チソウ タイゼン]

It's funny how I can get to 30s on BoHaY and yet Alice trips me up on Hard :derp:


Speaking of, I got to Yukari with 4/2/492Pt on my 98th attempt and got to Boundary of Humans and Youkai.
(The records menu says 99 tries, but the spellcard section says Zenki and Goki is at 10/33, so...)

[RegalStar]

The only way I see is to practice stage 5 to death...
like memorize the stage (spawn points of orbs, where not to shoot, gap abuse, planned bombs, etc)
and like fight orin to death (50+ times or something), with many planned bomb if necessary.

The number of times I've attempted Normal Cat's Walk is something like 70 before I 1cc'd SA Normal, so yeah.

Practice the hell (no pun intended) out of the stage and you'll have enough lives to throw away for Okuu ^^

[Naut]

Tried this no UFO's 1cc thing for the lulz.

Got all the way to Byakuren. I then game over because I apparently forgot how to do Magic Butterfly.  :X

Bombs, y/n?

[Zengeku]

Bombs, y/n?

Just about to ask that question. So what will it be Jaimie?

[Jaimers]

Just the two per life.

What? Was the first run in ages mang.