My laptop came with a horrible piece of malware, better known as Vista. What should I do?
I apologize that you are experiencing a problem with Microsoft Windows Vista and am happy to help you with a resolution. Microsoft has released Windows Vista Service Pack 2, code-named "Windows 7," in a convenient standalone upgrade package which is available at retailers everywhere or with new PCs. You might also want to disable your User Access Control, remove any firewall software, and use Windows Security Center to filter all traffic for all protocols on ports 1-65535 at all times, allowing no exceptions.
Some users have also reported success at using Unix exclusively, although this is not an official Microsoft product.
[nsfw]http://img163.imageshack.us/img163/3496/7251245.jpg[/nsfw]
I'm having back problems for some reason. What should I do?
I apologize that you are experiencing a problem with Microsoft Spinal Column 2.5 and am happy to help you with a resolution. May I ask please if you are having pain, stiffness, tingling, or numbness, and is it in your upper, middle, or lower back?
My computer is broken. Fix it
I apologize that you are experiencing a problem with your computer running Microsoft Windows Operating System and am happy to help you with a resolution.
May I please ask you what state your cup holder is in?
i think i have the sage virus1what do i do!!!1
I apologize that you are experiencing a problem with Microsoft Windows Vista and am happy to help you with a resolution.
I must please ask you to do the needful to provide the logs of directory in question.
My computer doesn't work
Thank you for calling Computer Support. Please state the nature of your computer emergency.