Author Topic: What If ... v. 4.0 Shoot the Bullet (Read 119765 times)

Leon゠Helsing · « **Reply #480 on:** May 16, 2014, 02:36:18 AM »

It'd end just like any other 2hu game, Fantasy Seal/Master Spark/Whatever up her ass and then they all have tea together.

What if Sakuya was actually a dhampir?

UnendingEmpire · « **Reply #481 on:** May 16, 2014, 02:37:56 AM »

The Sakuya theorists who think she's a vampire would rejoice for being close enough

What if Remilia isn't a vampire at all, but a sorceress who gets her power from a vampire familiar - Flan?

Esper · « **Reply #482 on:** May 16, 2014, 02:45:33 AM »

Quote from: UnendingEmpire on May 16, 2014, 02:37:56 AM

What if Remilia isn't a vampire at all, but a sorceress who gets her power from a vampire familiar - Flan?

>Sakuya trips and drops Remi's parasol in daylight
>Nothing happens to Remi
>Remi fires everything everywhere to cover her tracks

What if Konata were a 2hu?

Leon゠Helsing · « **Reply #483 on:** May 16, 2014, 02:58:43 AM »

I believe she and Suika would get along just fine.

What if Patchy has been writing yuri fanfics of the SDM crew behind their back?

Esper · « **Reply #484 on:** May 16, 2014, 03:02:54 AM »

Quote from: Leonard-Helsing on May 16, 2014, 02:58:43 AM

What if Patchy has been writing yuri fanfics of the SDM crew behind their back?

Sakuya starts writing straightfics of Patchouli in retort.

What if Cirno were really far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

game2011 · « **Reply #485 on:** May 16, 2014, 03:44:22 AM »

Then Daiyousei is very far even to do whatever is what we are like.

What if Seiga stole Yuyuko's corpse, the one buried beneath the Saigyou Ayakashi, and turned it into a Chinese zombie?

Abraham Lincoln · « **Reply #486 on:** May 16, 2014, 04:29:36 AM »

Quote from: game2011 on May 16, 2014, 03:44:22 AM

What if Seiga stole Yuyuko's corpse, the one buried beneath the Saigyou Ayakashi, and turned it into a Chinese zombie?

Vampire, not zombie.

We will have two of Yuyuko.

What if the Touhou characters were all personified ships (including Murasa)?

Utsukimi Jerry · « **Reply #487 on:** May 16, 2014, 04:53:36 AM »

Quote from: Abraham Lincoln on May 16, 2014, 04:29:36 AM

Vampire, not zombie.

We will have two of Yuyuko.

What if the Touhou characters were all personified ships (including Murasa)?

Danmaku laser fighting ships I guess? And Murasa will be the bad guy for obvious reasons.

What if Letty is not a snow youkai? And has a personal grudge against cirno?

TresserT · « **Reply #488 on:** May 16, 2014, 04:54:15 AM »

Quote from: Abraham Lincoln on May 16, 2014, 04:29:36 AM

What if the Touhou characters were all personified ships (including Murasa)?

Between Reimu, Alice, Patchouli, Flandre, Nitori, Rnnosuke, and anyone else I might be forgetting, Marisa is already pretty much ship personified.

EDIT: my bad

Quote from: Utsukimi Jerry on May 16, 2014, 04:53:36 AM

What if Letty is not a snow youkai? And has a personal grudge against cirno?

She must be a frogcicle tsukumogami. That expains everything, frozen then forgotten by the strongest fairy...

What if Marisa got married to Kourindou?

game2011 · « **Reply #489 on:** May 16, 2014, 05:03:26 AM »

Quote from: Abraham Lincoln on May 16, 2014, 04:29:36 AM

Vampire, not zombie.

No, it's actually a zombie, not vampire. People really only call it a vampire because it sucks life out of people rather than eating their brains. Being Taiwanese, I can tell you for sure that Chinese and Taiwanese people consider them zombies and not vampires.

"Zombie" in Chinese is "殭屍 (stiffed corpse)," while "vampire" is "吸血鬼 (blood-sucking ghost)." The actual term for Western zombies in Chinese is "喪屍,", but as far as I'm concerned, almost everyone uses "殭屍" instead when referring to the former, so it has become a catch-all term for both Western and Chinese zombies. Even Google Translate translates both those terms into "zombie." This is also why the fandom often portrays Yoshika as a Western zombie.

Anyway, the question...

This may be proof that buildings in Gensokyo have souls.

What if Cirno finds a functioning bomb buried in the ground and kicks it for the lulz?

frostare · « **Reply #490 on:** May 16, 2014, 05:06:27 AM »

Quote from: TresserT on May 16, 2014, 04:54:15 AM

Between Reimu, Alice, Patchouli, Flandre, Nitori, Rnnosuke, and anyone else I might be forgetting, Marisa is already pretty much ship personified.

EDIT: my badShe must be a frogcicle tsukumogami. That expains everything, frozen then forgotten by the strongest fairy...

What if Marisa got married to Kourindou?

There'd be common sense in Gensokyo

What if Cirno met Advent Cirno?

Abraham Lincoln · « **Reply #491 on:** May 16, 2014, 07:14:41 AM »

Quote from: TresserT on May 16, 2014, 04:54:15 AM

Between Reimu, Alice, Patchouli, Flandre, Nitori, Rnnosuke, and anyone else I might be forgetting, Marisa is already pretty much ship personified.

So...is she a submarine, destroyer, heavy/light cruiser, aircraft carrier or what?

And if Cirno and Advent Cirno met...Cirno would not have one ninth of a clue what that thing in front of her is.

What if Kogasa finds coloured contacts?

Leon゠Helsing · « **Reply #492 on:** May 16, 2014, 08:19:41 AM »

Quote from: game2011 on May 16, 2014, 05:03:26 AM

What if Cirno finds a functioning bomb buried in the ground and kicks it for the lulz?

Her head gets blown off and lands in Daiyousei's lap.

Quote from: Abraham Lincoln on May 16, 2014, 07:14:41 AM

What if Kogasa finds coloured contacts?

She puts a red one on her right eye to try and make herself look scarier, but fails anyway since it's pretty cliched.

What if Sakuya used cards instead of knives?

the old guy · « **Reply #493 on:** May 16, 2014, 08:26:16 AM »

Then she would be Gambit instead of Dio Brando.

What if it was The Dragon that dragged people into Gensokyo instead of Yukari? (She's far too lazy.)

FlareDragon · « **Reply #494 on:** May 16, 2014, 09:27:06 AM »

I would expect that the Youkai would try to obtain the 7 precious things, avoid beings like Ice-cold Cirno and Krill-like Wakasagihime, become Super Youkai and have danmaku levels over 9000, then be completely smashed by Meiling, who's clearly the embodiment of The Dragon and doesn't want His secret to be discovered. SHHHHhhhhh....

What if Youmu discovered a new realm, where everyone was a half-ghost?

Sssgth · « **Reply #495 on:** May 16, 2014, 11:16:02 AM »

Quote from: FlareDragon on May 16, 2014, 09:27:06 AM

What if Youmu discovered a new realm, where everyone was a half-ghost?

She'd tame a half-ghost half-dragon ~~who is really Meiling~~ can grant wishes.

What if TouColle?

Abraham Lincoln · « **Reply #496 on:** May 16, 2014, 11:45:39 AM »

Quote from: Sssgth on May 16, 2014, 11:16:02 AM

What if TouColle?

Murasa would be overpowered.
Marisa would be the most common ship.
Yuyuko would be an aircraft carrier.

What if Yuyuko was an aircraft carrier?

Sssgth · « **Reply #497 on:** May 16, 2014, 12:13:53 PM »

Quote from: Abraham Lincoln on May 16, 2014, 11:45:39 AM

What if Yuyuko was an aircraft carrier?

Then Youmu would be an airplane.
100 YOJANA IN ONE KAMIKAZE!

What if Alice was doll size, and her dolls were human size?

TresserT · « **Reply #498 on:** May 16, 2014, 12:45:39 PM »

In ~~Soviet Russia~~ Seija's Gensokyo, doll manipulates YOU!

What if the four and a half main humans got sick just before the next main game?

frostare · « **Reply #499 on:** May 16, 2014, 01:24:39 PM »

Touhou 15 Spreading Posthumous Pathology

What if Wynne was a 2hu? (http://etrian.wikia.com/wiki/Wynne)

UnendingEmpire · « **Reply #500 on:** May 16, 2014, 03:48:21 PM »

She and Rika would have lady boners for heavily-armed tanks together. Much psuedo-yuri.

What if Yuka took up a new hobby besides flowers and sadism?

Leon゠Helsing · « **Reply #501 on:** May 16, 2014, 04:21:14 PM »

I guess someone might get surprised enough to somehow offend her and earn a Dual Spark.

What if Flandre met Caim?

Sssgth · « **Reply #502 on:** May 16, 2014, 09:55:11 PM »

Quote from: Leonard-Helsing on May 16, 2014, 04:21:14 PM

What if Flandre met Caim?

KILL IT ALL! KILL IT ALL!

What if you were actually a dream of Reimu?

Misfortune! · « **Reply #503 on:** May 17, 2014, 12:38:05 AM »

The Matrix happens.

What if Sssgth was secretly a Phantasm boss, and even he didn't know it?

Sssgth · « **Reply #504 on:** May 17, 2014, 01:43:18 AM »

Quote from: Misfortune! on May 17, 2014, 12:38:05 AM

What if Sssgth was secretly a Phantasm boss, and even he didn't know it?

If in MotK themed danmaku shmup played by Gensokians, then fck yeah! I'm making Reimu rage right now. If in some other game, then okay, but oh well.

What if I was a Phantasm boss in the next touhou?

Abraham Lincoln · « **Reply #505 on:** May 17, 2014, 01:49:52 AM »

Quote from: Sssgth on May 17, 2014, 01:43:18 AM

What if I was a Phantasm boss in the next touhou?

Then Mima's diehard fans would weep in utmost despair because they were so close to seeing her resurrection but failed terribly. Yes, I know this is a bad answer.

What if this person was a 2hu?

Sssgth · « **Reply #506 on:** May 17, 2014, 02:43:08 AM »

Quote from: Abraham Lincoln on May 17, 2014, 01:49:52 AM

What if this person was a 2hu?

Massive hitbox, but fast, suppository danmaku and ~~maleness~~ war-themed spellcards.

What if my lil' sis was a 2hu, and we went on magical adventures together?

Abraham Lincoln · « **Reply #507 on:** May 17, 2014, 05:08:44 AM »

Cue tons of grazing, danmaku, pichuun, and then teatime.

What if Reimu was secretly George Washington?

Esper · « **Reply #508 on:** May 17, 2014, 01:19:45 PM »

Quote from: Abraham Lincoln on May 17, 2014, 05:08:44 AM

What if Reimu was secretly George Washington?

Then Marisa was Thomas Jefferson: Not the voice of reason, but still pretty damn effective.

What if Kanako was secretly Andrew Jackson?

Sssgth · « **Reply #509 on:** May 17, 2014, 08:34:27 PM »

Quote from: What am I, anyway? on May 17, 2014, 01:19:45 PM

What if Kanako was secretly Andrew Jackson?

Perfect fit: crazy-ass and inconsiderate.

What if I had a pet Yukkuri Miko?