Updates will begin around 8:00pm GMT+1 now, since this is simply an easier time for me.
DAY 3: THE DAY OF OLD PEOPLE
>Rigged I tell you, rigged. Eviscerate the next poster with my verdant fury.
4+1 =5 : You know what Dormio, I've had it with your rule-breaking. No +1 for this, and you can't screw the rules, you don't have 6's.
Raikaria: Attack Dormio
1: GODDAMNIT
Raikaria must roll to dodge!
3: Owchie. Where did Dormio get this power anyway? [-1 to next roll for me]
>Transform wall into a state of the art Mobile Suit.
2: It's a wall.
(It's sort of a modified Gundam, the page I linked tells about it.)
Well, time for this old-timer to show everyone what it means to be a Mobile Suit Pilot!
>Let's push this thing's speed to the limit, and take out as many Mobile Suits as we can!
1: You shut the Gundam down. And promptly get shot like the sitting suck you are.
Hanzo must Roll to Dodge!3: You manage to power back up and dodge in time, but you took some minor damage. [-1 to next roll]
>Get on knees, put your hands in the air, and look upwards, wailing "NOOOOOOOOO!!!" as the camera pans outward dramatically.
3: Unfortunately you cannot get the camera to pan. So instead you go for a stationary comic panel instead.
>Become THE magical girl
2: You're too old to qualify.
>Keep digging! We I shall find whatever answers we I seek beyond the earth's crust!
>Feel sad about becoming old.
3: You keep digging. However, you do not find answers.
Oh crap.
Unmatched Sock must Roll to Dodge!2: The Balrog lashes you with it's fire-whip, but you manage to survive.
Unmatched Sock is Seriously Injured!> Turn young again through sheer hot-bloodedness.
3: You lose a year worth of age. Welp, you did turn younger.
>Become the New Gandalf.
6: You become the New Gandalf. Unfortunately, this draws attention from the Balrog.
The Hating Hater must Roll to dodge!3: Apparently, squishy wizards are more nimble than miners. You get nicked by the Balrog's Fire-sword still. [-1 to next roll]
Haman's a lady. But that's not important. What's important is getting her into a Guncannon!
>Convince her to pilot a Guncannon.
5: You convince the pink-haired now-old lady to get into a Guncannon. Which promptly becomes more awesome when a giant Kanako shows up, the 'Guncannon Goddess' and works alongside you.[+1 to next roll for sheer awesome]
>This must be a sign of the Elder Gods coming! I must prepare myself for their imminent arrival.
2: The only thing coming is a Balrog. You cannot prepare for that.
> Revert Yamame and myself back to our proper ages via the ~*~power of love ~*~.
4+1 =5: LOVE CONQUERS ALL. Including money and badly-made Hammock-induced magic! [+1 to next roll]
> 
2:
>Attempts to fight the class system by using his dull and broken axe to heal the Fightest's wounds.
6: Not only do you heal Fightest's wounds, but your healing might goes so far as it reverts everyone back to their true age, since that counted as a negative status effect! Unfortunately since Fightest wasn't petrified, PX is still stone.
Fightest is healed!
Zakeri has changed class into 'Axe Cleric'
Everyone is back to normal ages!
Kyuubei slinks back to wherever it came from, to make some poor little girl magical.>Acquire (read: steal) a weapon.
1: You give all your weapons away.
>Sojourn to the Zeon Beat Factory to obtain all the wubs I shall ever need.
4: Wubs, fully loaded!
Oh right RPG exists
> Locate a suitably large tree to attach to; maybe its nutrients will transform my arm to match the rest of me!
5: You attach to a suitably large tree. Not only does this fix your arm, but it upgrades you from a mere Dryad into a Treant. Except this isn't your normal slow Treant, it's a lighter, slimmer Treant that's got Dryad qualities. Think a Treant that's not like a 90 year old man.
>Praise the Nines for Nines are the most Nines in the Nines.
6: By praising the 9's, you make 7 angry. 7 then proceeds to eat 9.
789.
>Acquire a steamroller and roll onwards to the future!
4: 'When this steamroller hits 66 MPH, we're gonna see some serious ****'
"Oh no, we've lost track of the ball."
"Who cares about the ball Bob, the players've started fighting!"
1: The Oni promptly stop fighting, dig up the ball, and start to play like the Crow Tengu teams. The crowd get angry at the commentator's curse, and come for you!
O4rfish must Roll to Dodge!5: The crowd get distracted by a fairy team flying onto the pitch for some reason, thinking it's their turn, and promptly getting beaten up by BOTH Oni teams. The Violence is far better this way! [+1 to next roll]
>Look for a four-leaf clover. You'll need the luck.
5: You find two 4-leaf clovers. [+1 to next roll]
> Construct a statue of Einstein whose presence blocks time-travel.
6: You construct a statue of Eienstein, who's completion happens just as time travel initiates. This makes the timeline go mental, akin to 'Chicken or the Egg'.
Ultimately, the steamroller both remains in this time, and manages to travel to the future. Whoops.
LaserTurtle now has a clone in the future! He can command both of them in the same turn. FutureTurtle and PresentTurtle must be used to differentiate them.>Acquire a fitting walking stick. Preferably something in the +4 range.
4: You get a walking stick. You don't need it anymore, but it's fancy!
>Make those damn kids get off my lawn.
2: You go to chase the kids off your lawn.
Then you remember EVERYONE is an old hag, so there are no kids to chase.
Of course, right after you realize this and go back inside, Zakeri's magic turns everyone back.
> Attempt to ask Nuffle a question. (The question being "Can I just make a rolling post and not be in the game?")
6: You manage to ascend to the plain beyond the game, and ask Nuffle a question, to which he answers 'You are beyond the game already.'
Keester2 is beyond the plain of reality!PX how dare you turn me into an old hag! >:<
> Use PX's power of aging to change my Baby Dragon and Dark Magician into the Ancient Thousand Dragon and Dark Sage! Now the convention hall belongs TO MEEEEEE!
Learn your Children's Card game card names Shadoweh.
e Sorry I only memorize GOOD CARDS
5+1=6: Despite recalling a card that isn't good [Dark Sage], despite his claim to the contrary, Shadoweh manages to summon Thousand Dragon and Dark Sage without using Time Wizard. Unfortunately, you are quickly called out on for cheating by Children's Card Game officials, who had arrived to congratulate you for your Exodia topdeck. The creator of the game himself sets the Rule-maker on you, under the pretense that only the people who can defeat him in a Children's Card Game, can screw the rules of said game.
>Old Magical Girl (woman?)? Lich time.
5: You turn back into a not-old woman [Good thing too, or else Revive kills zombie] and then turn yourself into a Lich.
Of course, Liches, being a type of undead, means doing so kills you and then instantly revives you.
UncertainJakutten has died!
UncertainJakutten has resurrected as a Lich!* Special Lich rules: Liches can treat 3's on a Roll to Dodge as 4, and 2's as 3's. They do not care about mere injuries. 1's are always 1's. This is because you sacrificed your first life.
> Equip the town loon in my armor slot.
1: The Town Loon equips you as a weapon.
> Place a kitten in the topic
6: You place 1,000 kittens in the topic.
In true Dwarf Fortress Fashion, if left unchecked, this will turn into a Catsplosion.
>Give Shadoweh a flying cane
5: You give Shadoweh a flying cane powered by rockets!
====
Status:
*Note: To save time and space, only actual status changes will be listed. You can keep track of your position in story from the above.
Players:
Alive:
Hanzo K: -1 to next roll
Unmatched Sock: Seriously Injured [2]
Hater: -1 to next roll
Phlegeth: +1 to next roll
Kilgamayan: +1 to next roll
LaserTurtle: Can command PresentTurtle and FutureTurtle
O4rfish: +1 to next Roll
Massaca: +1 to next roll
Keegster2: Is beyond the game's Multiverse, with me and Nuffle. [Anything targeting him will only work on a 6]
Undead:
UncertainJakutten [2nd Life]: Is a Lich, by sacrificeing his 1st life. 3's on dodges are 4's. 2's on dodges are 3's. 1's are still 1's. On death is Perma-Dead.
Dead:
Pesco
NPC:
Raikaria: -1 to next roll
Nuffle: Talking with Keegster2
Kyuubei:
Left the gameThe Balrog: On a rampage
1,000 Kittens: Growing at an accelerated rate
====
The Balrog has joined the game!
Time until Kittens reach maturity and cause a Catsplosion: 3 turns
Counters to 
: 1/6===
Balrog:
Pass Gandalf by using extreme force [Hater]
Raikaria:
Do nothing except roll for himself to remove -1 penalty
===
Day 4 begins!
