~Beyond the Border~ > Aya's Personals Section

Pesco and Serpentarius (Season 1)

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helvetica:
This thread is for the lovely lady Pesco to resist the gentleman's charm of Sir Serpentarius.

Serp:
Oh, Pesco, you poor, doomed soul.  The RNG must hate you, for you have been paired with the very paragon of manliness and domination.  Had you been matched with anyone else, I would have given you good odds to come out of this courting ritual victorious, but alas!  Serpentarius is your suitor and opponent.  Surrender now, or else my ravishing of you shall be so complete that not even Roukanken will recognize you well enough to shed girly tears over your exhausted form!

Pesco:
(OOC: This is an excellent match for personal reasons. Let's entertain her to the best of our abilities.)

Rou has no need to shed tears for me because I am worthy of them.

But you. Can you even afford lobola?

Serp:
(OOC:  Quite an ironic result, yes.  I could hardly have been given a more amusing choice of partner.)

Hah!  My lobola to you shall be a lifetime supply of Preparation H - a steep brideprice indeed, with the fate that awaits you at my hands, but it is well within my means to provide.  Doubt not my ability to support you, for you shall live as a queen under my dominion!  I will build for you a life size replica of Eietei, you shall subsist on a diet of the finest carrots and carrot juice, and servants shall scour the internets for you every evening to deliver the classiest of Touhou pr0nz.  During the day, all your desires shall be met, and during the night, I assure you that you will be well occupied!

Pesco:
You're so on the wrong continent. What the hell are carrots? We don't get those out in the savannah. And your lobola offering is too cheap to even consider. You really didn't know what it is.

I'll give you another chance. How big is your kraal? How many bulls in your herd?

(Judges: Can we bring in props (like 3rd party cameos)?)

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