Maidens of the Kaleidoscope

~Beyond the Border~ => Daiyousei's Cold Storage => Topic started by: Tengukami on November 16, 2012, 03:22:22 PM

Title: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 16, 2012, 03:22:22 PM
REPENT, SINNER!

(http://i46.tinypic.com/t56ae1.jpg)

Have you sinned lately? Done something wrong that you feel bad about? Want to make up for it, put it behind you once and for all, and rid yourself of that nagging sense of guilt?

NOW'S YOUR CHANCE!

Here's how it works:

Confess: Tell us what you did wrong. Don't make excuses or try to rationalize it away - just own up to your mistake, honestly and unconditionally. It doesn't have to be some huge bombshell, like you once shot a man in Reno just to watch him die. But the fact is, we all make mistakes. Whatever you did or whoever you wronged, let it out. Shikieiki is here to help.

Do your penance: By posting your sin in this thread, you agree to receive and faithfully perform your penance in a timely fashion. Don't worry - it won't be anything degrading or humiliating. In fact, it will be something fun for you, and entertaining for the rest of us. All that is asked is that you do your penance quickly, and don't chicken out. Besides, you wouldn't confess your sin unless you were willing to atone for it, would you?

Receive absolution: If you have successfully completed your penance, Shikieiki will officially absolve you of your sin. From that moment forward, you can then release yourself of your guilt and shame, and move forward into a bright future.

So then, you filthy sinner, tell the Yama of Paradise of your sins, and begin your path to salvation!
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Kilgamayan on November 16, 2012, 04:12:17 PM
Some of the overly brazen and efforted bigotry on 4chan makes me laugh.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: JT on November 16, 2012, 04:27:51 PM
I beat a nun to death on the steps of a church with a table leg.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: MatsuriSakuragi on November 16, 2012, 04:42:05 PM
I am a hopeless procrastinator who will take every possible chance to not work because it makes me feel better than working.

Even if I feel better after work is done.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Pesco on November 16, 2012, 04:43:19 PM
I play DotA.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: HakureiSM on November 16, 2012, 04:46:29 PM
I play DotA.
thread over, snowball challenge Pesco
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: [Y]oukai [J]esus on November 16, 2012, 05:01:25 PM
I play DotA.

YJLuck vs Pescoskill.
1v1 let's do this how many times do I get a 4x/4sec stun on you?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Rabbit on November 16, 2012, 05:05:08 PM
I voted Libertarian a couple of weeks ago.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: fondue on November 16, 2012, 05:05:57 PM
I was an attention whore in my classes today.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 16, 2012, 05:23:22 PM
Some of the overly brazen and efforted bigotry on 4chan makes me laugh.

Hm. Understandable, but very regrettable. For your penance, you must start a thread on /pol/. Your OP must posit a reasoned argument in favor of affirmative action at colleges, citing at least three sources. Whether or not you reply is entirely your choice, but you do need to link to the thread or post a screencap as proof.

I beat a nun to death on the steps of a church with a table leg.

I'm sure you had your reasons. However, this is unfortunately technically a sin. Therefore, for your penance you must draw a sketch of you doing something genuinely nice for Ichirin Kumoi (http://en.touhouwiki.net/wiki/Ichirin_Kumoi).

I am a hopeless procrastinator who will take every possible chance to not work because it makes me feel better than working.

Even if I feel better after work is done.

We can all relate to this, certainly. Sloth, though, is not just a sin - it's a deadly sin. For your penance, write a paragraph about why sloths are the best mammals on the face of the planet.

I play DotA.

Oh, Pesco. This is most egregious. To repent for this horror, you must play this game (http://chibitami.net/works/flash/fla2flan/index.html) until you get a score of 15, posting a screencap as proof. (The controls are simple: arrow keys move the spawning crystals.)

I voted Libertarian a couple of weeks ago.

Are you trying to anger the Yama on purpose? This requires special attention. For your penance, you must write a fawning, shameless fanfic of no less than 500 words involving you and Dennis Kucinich, wherein he is your love interest, and he rejects your advances.

I was an attention whore in my classes today.

Color the Yama surprised. What more fitting penance for attention whoring than compelled attention whoring? For your penance, you must fire up the Touhou game of your choice, and play a pacifist Lunatic run until you run out of lives, and then upload the replay file here. Do make a genuine effort to get as far as you can - the Yama can tell if you're suiciding just to get it over with.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Rabbit on November 16, 2012, 05:30:53 PM
I don't even know who that is!
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 16, 2012, 05:32:01 PM
Not the Yama's problem! Look it up - Wikipedia is your friend.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: I have no name on November 16, 2012, 05:35:19 PM
I did this today.  I bad at this game  :3
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Kilgamayan on November 16, 2012, 05:35:43 PM
Is there something I can do that won't risk my getting banned from 4chan? Because that's a nontrivial possibility with what you're proposing.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Pesco on November 16, 2012, 05:38:53 PM
Oh, Pesco. This is most egregious. To repent for this horror, you must play this game (http://chibitami.net/works/flash/fla2flan/index.html) until you get a score of 15, posting a screencap as proof. (The controls are simple: arrow keys move the spawning crystals.)

Too easy (http://puu.sh/1qQJo)
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 16, 2012, 05:41:33 PM
Is there something I can do that won't risk my getting banned from 4chan? Because that's a nontrivial possibility with what you're proposing.

Sure, you could just post what you would write here instead.

I did this today.  I bad at this game  :3

That is indeed very, very bad. The Yama wants to see you do it again, in Lunatic mode. With Reisen.

Too easy (http://puu.sh/1qQJo)

Congratulations, Pesco! You are hereby absolved of the sin of playing DotA. Go forth with a pure heart, into Paradise.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Suikama on November 16, 2012, 05:42:47 PM
i slept with your subordinate
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: I have no name on November 16, 2012, 05:44:51 PM
That is indeed very, very bad. The Yama wants to see you do it again, in Lunatic mode. With Reisen.
Good run with Reisen or repeated suicide with Reisen?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Iryan on November 16, 2012, 05:51:11 PM
Remember that one time when suddenly it smelled like someone smashed foul eggs with a burnt rubber tire?


That was me.


And it felt so good.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 16, 2012, 06:00:50 PM
i slept with your subordinate

Somehow the Yama is not surprised. For your penance, you must create a work of visual art praising the spiritual purity of Komachi. Feel free to make it a collage of existing art, by your own hand, or both. But it must convey purity of some kind.

Remember that one time when suddenly it smelled like someone smashed foul eggs with a burnt rubber tire?


That was me.


And it felt so good.

How revolting. Clearly, your diet is lacking and in need of some serious improvement. For your penance, you are to make a salad and eat it, posting Before and After photos of the salad (yes, the second photo will clearly be of an empty bowl and not the salad itself.)

Good run with Reisen or repeated suicide with Reisen?

Congratulations, ihavenoname! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: HakureiSM on November 16, 2012, 06:08:22 PM
Is there something I can do that won't risk my getting banned from 4chan? Because that's a nontrivial possibility with what you're proposing.
Just use a proxy to make the post, 4ch bans are IP based
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: fondue on November 16, 2012, 06:10:24 PM

I don't know why but Ammy fits the role of Shikieiki.
Color the Yama surprised. What more fitting penance for attention whoring than compelled attention whoring? For your penance, you must fire up the Touhou game of your choice, and play a pacifist Lunatic run until you run out of lives, and then upload the replay file here. Do make a genuine effort to get as far as you can - the Yama can tell if you're suiciding just to get it over with.
Fine I'll do it after dinner :I Also here are some more sins.
-I went onto 4chan and I'm 14
-I used to not know who Bob Dylan was
Just use a proxy to make the post, 4ch bans are IP based
With some proxies and VPNs 4chan will ban you ASAP when you try to post though.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 16, 2012, 06:18:25 PM
Fine I'll do it after dinner :I Also here are some more sins.
-I went onto 4chan and I'm 14
-I used to not know who Bob Dylan was

One thing at a time. We'll get to each one after you post your penance. Enjoy your dinner!
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: theshirn on November 16, 2012, 06:20:17 PM
I have - for a very brief period of time - not wanted to horribly murder 98% of this forum.  What do I do? :ohdear:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: MatsuriSakuragi on November 16, 2012, 06:28:19 PM
We can all relate to this, certainly. Sloth, though, is not just a sin - it's a deadly sin. For your penance, write a paragraph about why sloths are the best mammals on the face of the planet.

I understand not your method, yama-sama, in which I must venerate the creature for which this deadly sin was named after in lieu of working on what I am procrastinating on. However, I shall respect your wisdom.

What shall I say for the sloth? Well, first and foremost, they are, by far, experts in the field of destressing and relaxation. They neither desire more than they need, nor do they work too hard for what they do not-- such pragmatic beings, they are. This is something we as humans can learn from, for we spend much of our time in pursuit of frivolous things instead of taking the time to stop and enjoy the little things in life-- delicious leaves, strong arms that have known many embraces and keep a firm grip on reality, and simply the value of just hanging around. They seek little beyond this, and take everything one step at a time. Some may mistake their slow demeanor for lethargy, when in actuality, they are very deliberate and mindful of their every movement. Once again, we humans, if you will appreciate the pun, would do well to take a leaf from their books. But that is not to say that we must disregard our duties. The wise sloth has no prior obligations, and takes advantage of this. Humans, on the other hand, always have someone or something to answer to. When we do this-- when our duties are accomplished, it is then that we can take time to learn to embrace our inner sloth-- not for laziness, no-- but for the sake of learning to enjoy life when we have no other pre-existing tasks to complete. We always seek more and more, when sometimes all we really need is some time to breathe. That is why the sloth is the best mammal on the face of this planet-- and not just the face of this planet, for there are sloths that have gone beyond this. I shall close this thought with proof of this statement:
(http://i.imgur.com/8HCA2.jpg)

Never underestimate your abilities. If you take everything one step at a time, like the sagacious sloth, your mighty arms can reach out for and embrace the stars, as well. Anything worth doing is worth the wait.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 16, 2012, 06:44:03 PM
I have - for a very brief period of time - not wanted to horribly murder 98% of this forum.  What do I do? :ohdear:

Wow, that must have been incredibly difficult for you! However, this shows a lack of commitment to the reputation you've developed on this forum. Therefore, for your penance you must take this to the next level: compose a poem comprised of ten stanzas in iambic pentameter, expressing your love for the community as a whole.


Congratulations, Matsy! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Rabbit on November 16, 2012, 06:45:28 PM
The creed of the Cleveland mafia is that its enemies die ignoble deaths.  No trials, no recognition of any ability they hold, not even a record of their order to be killed.  A quick, surgical procedure, a reflexive, impassive, reaction to eliminate an enemy that leaves behind only the slightest of blemishes, soon to be hushed up and covered for fear of prompting more invisible executions.  Traitors and rebels may gird themselves for the unlimited waves of soldiers crushing their apartments underfoot, car-disintegrating improvised explosive devices, and fearless, unstoppable, merciless lawyers. Yet, how they quail when oh so casually, their honored leader, god figure, demagogue, idol, chosen one, noble general, great hero, neighbor, friend, mother, father, child, or, in this case, mayor falls lifeless, a round dark hole in their forehead.

"Do not fail."

Most munitions that this assassin had dealt with previously had been subsonic, quiet, subtle machines that he was expected to keep hidden and assemble on site; other rules stated that all weapons had to be legal in the affected states, to make law enforcement think that the mafia's judgment came from the people.

Although the contract had been called off many years ago, it no longer mattered to the assassin.  She had tracked the political career of this man, Dennis Kucinich, since he was the youngest mayor of Cleveland ever, watching and waiting for the opportune moment to strike.  She?  He?  The assassin no longer remembered what it was anymore.  It didn't matter.  The only thing that mattered anymore was the target.  They called it the Rabbit long ago, and it had staked its professional career on the elimination of this one man.  With each passing moment its hatred of the man's policies grew until it was so extreme that it crossed the paradox line.

?I...can't.?

It levelled its rifle, a poor old battered thing, and fired into the crowd.

When Kucinich came to, he found himself on a hard, wooden floor.  Crickets chirped outside and it was dark, the only light coming from a small gas lamp placed by his cot.  He was both confused and slightly terrified.  His only memory was of hearing shots ring out as he stepped out of the station, then being clubbed unconscious.  His head hurt.

Then he realized he was not alone in this room, wherever it was.  Something was there with him, a shadowy figure sitting on a chair in the corner that watched his every move like a hawk.  He shuffled awkwardly from time to time, or was it a she?  It was impossible to tell.  There was an extremely awkward silence.

Finally, Kucinich spoke.

?Look, I don't know why you did this but if it's money you want...?

?No!? the shadowy figure called out, ?It's not...not like that.?

?What??

?Well, I-  You see, the thing is-?

?I don't understand.  Have I done something to you that I should know about??

Kucinich was confused.  Maybe it was one of the crazies with a gun that appeared from time to time, shooting members of Congress because they disagreed with some policy or other.  It was insane.  He was about to become the next Representative Giffords.

?Y-you did?, the shadowy figure stuttered, then mumbled something.

?I'm sorry, I didn't catch that last part.?

It mumbled again, a little more audible this time.

?You're going to need to speak louder than that.  I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong.?

?you stole my heart?, it said finally.

The silence that followed was almost palpable.

?Wh-what??

?I-I just don't understand it!? the figure ranted, ?ever since I was young I've always despised you and everything you stood for!  When you wouldn't bend to our wishes I was sent to kill you but for some reason I can't!?

Kucinich could not help but stare in absolute bewilderment.

?You have to help me!? the figure implored, ?I don't think I could bear to be away from you any longer.?

Kucinich chose his next words very carefully, ?Look, I don't know who you are, but I don't think I'm the one who can help you.  I have a family.  I have a constituency that needs me.  I can't just leave them all for someone I barely even know.

?I know that?, the figure whispered brokenly, ?and its left me in a bit of a bind.?

There was a thump as the figure laid something on the ground.  Kucinich reached out for it, and felt the heavy weight of a pistol in his hands.

?It's loaded?, the figure said.

?What are you doing??

?This is the only way it can end.  You can't stay here, and I can't stay away from you.  Now it's time to choose.  Kill me and you can leave.?

?Wait, you don't know what you're saying.?

?Choose or I'll shoot you and rid myself of these feelings.?

?There has to be another way to resolve this.?

?Choose!?

?I can't!?

?CHOOSE!?

Deep in the forest, a single shot ran out and the birds scattered.

Word Count: 863
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Menorah Jams, Pham on November 16, 2012, 06:49:22 PM
I said a Shema Yisroel before every IT cert exam I ever took despite not only being a lapsed Jew, I'm also an atheist, lean towards Palestinian statehood (although the Right of Return is a bit much) and I love pork, lobster, etc. 

In short, I'm a hypocrite despite nobody else really caring. 
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Reddyne on November 16, 2012, 07:00:41 PM
I have trusted my supervisors at work.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: HakureiSM on November 16, 2012, 07:17:45 PM
I like Pepsi as much as I like Coca-cola
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Shadoweh on November 16, 2012, 07:47:50 PM
I'm Canadian. :ohdear:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 16, 2012, 07:53:00 PM

Rabbit, you have pleased the Yama greatly. Congratulations! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

I said a Shema Yisroel before every IT cert exam I ever took despite not only being a lapsed Jew, I'm also an atheist, lean towards Palestinian statehood (although the Right of Return is a bit much) and I love pork, lobster, etc. 

In short, I'm a hypocrite despite nobody else really caring. 

Ah, a conflict of faith! That is indeed a pickle. It seems you need to get in touch with your religious side. As you are a home-brewer, I think it's time you said a Ha-Gafen over the fruits of your labors. For proof of such, you can post photos, video, or describe the experience in detail.

I have trusted my supervisors at work.

The Yama would be tempted to say you've been punished enough, but a sin is a sin and must be atoned for. As you have committed the sin of blindly following authority, you must listen to and analyze this song (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zKkkRgqWUuU). I await your reasoned critique.

I like Pepsi as much as I like Coca-cola

You are just determined to go to Hell, aren't you? Very well - open your refidgerator, take out the first three beverages you see, mix them together, and drink them. If there aren't three beverages, you can use coffee, tea, or some of that booze you made. Photo results of the mix are required.

I'm Canadian. :ohdear:

I notice you wrote that in English. But being Canadian, and Canada being officially a bilingual country, you surely must also know French, too, don't you? Compose, then, a poem for Dormio in French, of any length (yes, haiku also counts).
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: fondue on November 16, 2012, 08:03:30 PM
Apart from Quebec, since when was Canada french?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 16, 2012, 08:06:40 PM
Apart from Quebec, since when was Canada french?

The French were there first. The British took over around 1755.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: nintendonut888 on November 16, 2012, 08:07:49 PM
I have to work at the library shortly at a desk that has a YOLO joke taped to the front of it.

I'm going to hell aren't I. :(
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Suikama on November 16, 2012, 08:17:13 PM
I have to work at the library shortly at a desk that has a YOLO joke taped to the front of it.

I'm going to hell aren't I. :(
that depends if you only library once
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 16, 2012, 08:17:52 PM
I have to work at the library shortly at a desk that has a YOLO joke taped to the front of it.

I'm going to hell aren't I. :(

You are indeed. You know, Jack Black is said to have said that "YOLO is 'carpe diem' for stupid people." The phrase "carpe diem" first gained pop culture attention in the movie Dead Poet's Society, starring Robin Williams. While that was a great role and a great movie, he also played the eponymous main character of one of the worst movies ever made, Patch Adams. Your penance is to compose a 10-stanza kenning wherein Patch Adams tries to cheer up Gengetsu on her deathbed.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tamer Anode/Cathode on November 16, 2012, 08:25:37 PM
I'm inexplicably attracted to women in aviation gear.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Aba Matindesu! on November 16, 2012, 08:28:08 PM
I crave chocolate-flavored powdered milk at odd hours.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Vento on November 16, 2012, 08:35:22 PM
today i drew some touhou instead of drawing a phone.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on November 16, 2012, 08:39:15 PM
I touch myself at night. :<
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Phoenix_lostarr on November 16, 2012, 08:39:59 PM
I'm constantly thinking of having the girls in my class as sex slaves
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Teewee on November 16, 2012, 08:48:07 PM
I fed my dog white chocolate. Does that make me racist  :ohdear:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 16, 2012, 08:49:36 PM
I'm inexplicably attracted to women in aviation gear.

Oh, so, you think I'm going to make you write a love poem to Amelia Earhart? Nice try, Mr. Reverse Psychology. No, your penance is to clear the first five levels of this game (http://www.hypegames.com/arcade/4805/tu-95-flight-simulator.html) and screencap and post results.

I crave chocolate-flavored powdered milk at odd hours.

I feel sorry for your pancreas. Your penance is to draw and post a picture of a sad pancreas.

today i drew some touhou instead of drawing a phone.

Shirking assignments? Disgraceful. You must draw and post a picture of five very different types of phones. One of them must be Candlestick telephone (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Candlestick_telephone).

I touch myself at night. :<

Ugh, seriously? No one cares. Why would you share this? Do you think anyone wants to imagine this?

For your penance, you must change your avatar to one that represents the opposite of sex. This (http://i.imgur.com/uqDEm.jpg) is what you will use.

I'm constantly thinking of having the girls in my class as sex slaves

How sexist! For your penance, you are to sing, record, and post a song praising Janeane Garofalo to the tune of "She'll Be Coming 'Round The Mountain".

I fed my dog white chocolate. Does that make me racist  :ohdear:

Yes it does. For your penance, you must watch and review an episode of Through The Wormhole, starring Morgan Freeman, in 300 words or less.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Phoenix_lostarr on November 16, 2012, 08:51:17 PM
My headset is broken and I am le poor. :V
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 16, 2012, 08:52:17 PM
My headset is broken and I am le poor. :V

Then write the lyrics.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on November 16, 2012, 08:53:47 PM
LIBERA ME EX INFERNIS.

EDIT: She stares into my soul. :ohdear:

EDITEDIT: Hilariously my title and text still fit.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 16, 2012, 08:57:11 PM

Congratulations, Alliterator! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

After you have left your avatar this way for another 7 days.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on November 16, 2012, 08:58:09 PM
Congratulations, Alliterator! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

 :]

Quote
After you have left your avatar this way for another 7 days.

...

 :colonveeplusalpha:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: fondue on November 16, 2012, 08:58:33 PM
I touch myself at night. :<
Naughty naughty :I
Also I'm too lazy to play Touhou, I have completed the sin of sloth :<
The French were there first. The British took over around 1755.
I feel horrible now.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Dormio Ergo Sum on November 16, 2012, 08:58:54 PM
I play DotA.
I tried competitive DotA.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on November 16, 2012, 09:00:16 PM
I own Counter-Strike: Source AND Counter-Strike: Global Offensive. :V
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Yatakarasu on November 16, 2012, 09:00:46 PM
I think "U.N. Owen was Her?" and "Septette for the Dead Princess" are just OK songs.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tamashii Kanjou on November 16, 2012, 09:09:51 PM
Even Deities aren't immune to sinning...

I have not watched over, or updated, Shino's adventures (or training) for a number of months; and having not written anything for NaNo for the past 6 days has not helped my state at all.
Please forgive me, Shikieiki.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Menorah Jams, Pham on November 16, 2012, 09:15:06 PM
Ah, a conflict of faith! That is indeed a pickle. It seems you need to get in touch with your religious side. As you are a home-brewer, I think it's time you said a Ha-Gafen over the fruits of your labors. For proof of such, you can post photos, video, or describe the experience in detail.

But it's the saying of the blessings that's causing a crisis of faith - that is bringing faith into my atheism.  My sin isn't against being a good Jew, it's against being a good atheist.   :ohdear: :doushio:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: JT on November 16, 2012, 09:23:21 PM
I'm sure you had your reasons. However, this is unfortunately technically a sin. Therefore, for your penance you must draw a sketch of you doing something genuinely nice for Ichirin Kumoi (http://en.touhouwiki.net/wiki/Ichirin_Kumoi).

What could be nicer than making someone a pizza?

(http://oi47.tinypic.com/21jqfk2.jpg)

For clarity, what we are looking at here is a Digiorno pizza topped with three Red Baron Single Serve pizzas, which are, in turn, each topped with four Pizza Bagels.

Pizzaception.jpg.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 16, 2012, 09:28:31 PM

I actually doubled over laughing for a solid minute there.

Congratulations, JT! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

And keep your antacid tablets handy!

Also I'm too lazy to play Touhou, I have completed the sin of sloth

That's too bad. You are hereby banished to Hell, where vicious demons will feast upon your soul for eternity. Begone!

More penances will be coming soon for the rest of you - the Yama needs to go to a magazine staff party consult with the gods for a while. Feel free to post more sins - penances will most assuredly be given!
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on November 16, 2012, 09:31:37 PM
Dat Ichirinface.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Hello Purvis on November 16, 2012, 10:17:09 PM
I yell at people for liking things I don't like that are bad. The things are bad, not the people. But the people are sometimes bad too but that's only a correlation.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Dular on November 16, 2012, 10:54:31 PM
Oh great and mighty Eiki, I beseech ye!  I am guilty of making an inane and overly formal post to a person pretending to be a character of a fictional series!

How must I cleanse myself!?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Reddyne on November 16, 2012, 10:56:55 PM
The Yama would be tempted to say you've been punished enough, but a sin is a sin and must be atoned for. As you have committed the sin of blindly following authority, you must listen to and analyze this song (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zKkkRgqWUuU). I await your reasoned critique.
This song represents everything that I am except for the "paid" part. An individual with a scientific background is working for any one of a number of companies that relies on such people to keep their organization up and running. However, work has left him stressed while the company itself is milking the scientist dry. He also has the misfortune of working for a company that treats all of its employees like cogs in a wheel, regardless of effort or function. The stress has begun to wrack his nerves to a degree that he is highly considering action, but is balking due to the potential repercussions, allowing the stress to build. Though the scientist has obligations, the paycheck from this company is not worth the toll it is taking on the scientist.

That's the last time time I suffer through a 2-3 hour daily commute for a thankless chump like my last supervisor anyhow. Also, the lyricist's voice emits a secondary pitch at the resonant frequency of the human eardrum.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: FinnKaenbyou on November 16, 2012, 11:00:34 PM
I failed to beat Ninja Gaiden on the NES yesterday.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Molten on November 16, 2012, 11:12:11 PM
I have forgotten what people have told me to do because my memory is horrible. What should i do, Eiki?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Seppo Hovi on November 16, 2012, 11:15:35 PM
I play Touhou for score.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: pineyappled on November 16, 2012, 11:36:48 PM
I can't find any motivation to do anything, ever.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Raikaria on November 16, 2012, 11:44:10 PM
I haven't been able to get to sleep until like 2am recently, and even then, reluctantly.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Bio on November 16, 2012, 11:49:49 PM
The Yama has a terrible hat.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Pesco on November 16, 2012, 11:51:43 PM
(http://i565.photobucket.com/albums/ss96/ShinkenGreen97/th_Double.jpg)
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: marukyuu on November 17, 2012, 12:03:10 AM
I lurk too much and almost never post.
Please have mercy on my wretched soul.


(http://oi47.tinypic.com/21jqfk2.jpg)
Is the upside-down Hungarian flag in the background intentional? :getdown:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: JT on November 17, 2012, 12:16:40 AM
It was supposed to be the Italian flag, but I was too lazy to check Wikipedia and see that the bars are actually vertical. :I
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tamer Anode/Cathode on November 17, 2012, 12:26:58 AM
Oh, so, you think I'm going to make you write a love poem to Amelia Earhart? Nice try, Mr. Reverse Psychology. No, your penance is to clear the first five levels of this game (http://www.hypegames.com/arcade/4805/tu-95-flight-simulator.html) and screencap and post results.
(http://i.imgur.com/jMFvA.png)
Okay, to be honest, I didn't actually complete any of the levels leading up to this, but used the "skip this level" option after failing them multiple times.

And honestly I'm not that into Amelia anyway; I appreciate her accomplishments, but focusing on her alone means ignoring a lot of other women who contributed to aviation history, such as Harriet Quimby, Bessie Coleman, or Tiny Broadwick.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Ikari on November 17, 2012, 01:54:44 AM
I often eat for the sake of eating instead of hunger.

Ok I lied, I ALWAYS eat for the sake of eating instead of hunger.

FOOD IS JUST SO DELICIOUS, GODDAMNIT!
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: HakureiSM on November 17, 2012, 01:58:13 AM
Agh, I'll atone my sin as soon as I can
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: LadyScarlet on November 17, 2012, 03:49:59 AM
I broke a part on my Figma Aya Shameimaru. Specifically, the pen broke off the hand. When my parents find that out... ;_;
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on November 17, 2012, 04:11:19 AM
Tengushiki, I just reached a 5-star Wanted level with every gang AND the police in Saints Row 3.

WHAT DO?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: [Y]oukai [J]esus on November 17, 2012, 04:54:57 AM
(http://i565.photobucket.com/albums/ss96/ShinkenGreen97/th_Double.jpg)

I have not fully updated Elements of Gensokyo. Or my NaNoWriMo word count.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on November 17, 2012, 05:18:23 AM
I literally have at least 20+ story ideas on paper and in my head and I haven't finished a single one. :ohdear:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Minch on November 17, 2012, 05:19:52 AM
I love plotting the death of my enemies just to make me feel better. The gruesome the better.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: InfernalExuro on November 17, 2012, 06:14:39 AM
I've lurked without posting for the entire latter half of the summer and into fall... without even being motivated enough to post the reasons for vanishing, much less showing my face anywhere when I easily could have.  :ohdear:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Shadoweh on November 17, 2012, 10:24:34 AM
I notice you wrote that in English. But being Canadian, and Canada being officially a bilingual country, you surely must also know French, too, don't you? Compose, then, a poem for Dormio in French, of any length (yes, haiku also counts).
I-I don't know any french actually uhm.. let me ask my good friend Google.

D est pour le nombre de morts dans l'ensemble de vos qu?tes
O est pour la fa?on dont vous allez me faire la bouche en d?tresse
R est pour la rage contre vous vous sentez lucker DotA noobs
M est pour le mouthiness vous criez quand vous perdez
I est pour moi parce que vous-m?me est num?ro un
O est pour quelque oh les gars nous allons simplement vous amuser ~
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Ikari on November 17, 2012, 10:44:26 AM
D est pour le nombre de morts dans l'ensemble de vos qu?tes
O est pour la fa?on dont vous allez me faire la bouche en d?tresse
R est pour la rage contre vous vous sentez lucker DotA noobs
M est pour le mouthiness vous criez quand vous perdez
I est pour moi parce que vous-m?me est num?ro un
O est pour quelque oh les gars nous allons simplement vous amuser ~

French canadian here, allow me to chuckle at how half of it doesn't make sense.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: NekoNekoRex on November 17, 2012, 02:10:55 PM
I savescum when I play Nethack when I get bored of dying every time on the first six levels...
The only time I've ever beat Nethack was when I savescummed through the game.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: ♛ Apher-Forte on November 17, 2012, 04:10:18 PM
I accidentally a whole bottle of tropical strength manuka honey, the whole bottle, is this bad?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Kaze_Senshi on November 17, 2012, 04:50:38 PM
Some days ago I let Tails die by drowning when I was playing Sonic 2 , what should I do to save my damned soul?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Rabbit on November 17, 2012, 05:07:51 PM
I accidentally a whole bottle of tropical strength manuka honey, the whole bottle, is this bad?

That's a thing?  I always thought my Aussie and Kiwi friends were just making this shit up.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 17, 2012, 06:08:14 PM
The Yama is very hungover back from consulting with the gods. Time to hand out some penance and absolution!

But it's the saying of the blessings that's causing a crisis of faith - that is bringing faith into my atheism.  My sin isn't against being a good Jew, it's against being a good atheist.   :ohdear: :doushio:

The Yama appreciates the clarification. In that case, your penance is to post a photo of yourself imitating Richard Dawkins making his smuggest smug face.

I yell at people for liking things I don't like that are bad. The things are bad, not the people. But the people are sometimes bad too but that's only a correlation.

Ah, an all-too common sin. For your penance, you must think of a game which you do not like and give us 5 sincerely good qualities about said game.

Oh great and mighty Eiki, I beseech ye!  I am guilty of making an inane and overly formal post to a person pretending to be a character of a fictional series!

How must I cleanse myself!?

This is getting very meta for the Yama. For your penance, go to Metacritic and select one movie review, arguing why they are wrong.

This song represents everything that I am except for the "paid" part. An individual with a scientific background is working for any one of a number of companies that relies on such people to keep their organization up and running. However, work has left him stressed while the company itself is milking the scientist dry. He also has the misfortune of working for a company that treats all of its employees like cogs in a wheel, regardless of effort or function. The stress has begun to wrack his nerves to a degree that he is highly considering action, but is balking due to the potential repercussions, allowing the stress to build. Though the scientist has obligations, the paycheck from this company is not worth the toll it is taking on the scientist.

That's the last time time I suffer through a 2-3 hour daily commute for a thankless chump like my last supervisor anyhow. Also, the lyricist's voice emits a secondary pitch at the resonant frequency of the human eardrum.

Congratulations, Reddyne! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

I failed to beat Ninja Gaiden on the NES yesterday.

Penance for this sin is easy: you must beat Ninja Gaiden, and post proof of such.

I have forgotten what people have told me to do because my memory is horrible. What should i do, Eiki?

This is understandable, but must be atoned for. For your penance, you must play this game (http://www.zefrank.com/memory/) until you achieve a percentage of 75% or higher, and post results.

I play Touhou for score.

Disgraceful. For your penance, you must play SA for graze through all six stages. Post results, and if your graze count impresses the Yama, you will be absolved.

I can't find any motivation to do anything, ever.

Seems to be a lot of this going around. For your penance, you must post a photo of the least clean room in your home, clean it, and then post another photo showing the results.

I haven't been able to get to sleep until like 2am recently, and even then, reluctantly.

For your penance, you must read Edgar Allan Poe's The Tell-Tale Heart (http://xroads.virginia.edu/~hyper/poe/telltale.html), and write a brief sequel in the style of a Michael Bay film.

The Yama has a terrible hat.

The Yama rather likes her hat, and you have zero taste. For your penance, you must bear this avatar (http://i.imgur.com/30ibT.jpg).

(http://i565.photobucket.com/albums/ss96/ShinkenGreen97/th_Double.jpg)

The Yama is confused. Can you clarify your sin here?

I lurk too much and almost never post.
Please have mercy on my wretched soul.

The sin of shyness, I see. For your penance, you must go to the board where you lurk the least and make five substantial, contributive, non-spammy posts.

(http://i.imgur.com/jMFvA.png)
Okay, to be honest, I didn't actually complete any of the levels leading up to this, but used the "skip this level" option after failing them multiple times.

And honestly I'm not that into Amelia anyway; I appreciate her accomplishments, but focusing on her alone means ignoring a lot of other women who contributed to aviation history, such as Harriet Quimby, Bessie Coleman, or Tiny Broadwick.

Congratulations, TAC! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

I often eat for the sake of eating instead of hunger.

Ok I lied, I ALWAYS eat for the sake of eating instead of hunger.

FOOD IS JUST SO DELICIOUS, GODDAMNIT!

The sin of gluttony. Terrible. For your penance, you must find one vegan recipe, prepare it, and post results here in the form of a photo.

I broke a part on my Figma Aya Shameimaru. Specifically, the pen broke off the hand. When my parents find that out... ;_;

This is a most egregious sin. For your penance, you must write a brief, fawning fanfic about the reporter tengu.

Tengushiki, I just reached a 5-star Wanted level with every gang AND the police in Saints Row 3.

WHAT DO?

So it seems you've managed to piss everyone off in this video game world. For your penance, you must draw a picture of Matt Dillon in Boondock Saints eating a hot dog as he is about to be hit by a bus.

And as the Yama only doles out penance one sin at a time, new penances for your new sins will be given only after you'v atoned for this one.

I have not fully updated Elements of Gensokyo. Or my NaNoWriMo word count.

Well, this is simple: for your penance, you must update them.

I love plotting the death of my enemies just to make me feel better. The gruesome the better.

Hi Minch! For your penance, you must think of your worst enemy, and provide us with five workable good qualities about him or her.

I've lurked without posting for the entire latter half of the summer and into fall... without even being motivated enough to post the reasons for vanishing, much less showing my face anywhere when I easily could have.  :ohdear:

You must do the same penance as marukyuu.

I-I don't know any french actually uhm.. let me ask my good friend Google.

D est pour le nombre de morts dans l'ensemble de vos qu?tes
O est pour la fa?on dont vous allez me faire la bouche en d?tresse
R est pour la rage contre vous vous sentez lucker DotA noobs
M est pour le mouthiness vous criez quand vous perdez
I est pour moi parce que vous-m?me est num?ro un
O est pour quelque oh les gars nous allons simplement vous amuser ~

Congratulations, Shadoweh! That is some terrible, terrible French. Nonetheless, a deal is a deal. You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

I savescum when I play Nethack when I get bored of dying every time on the first six levels...
The only time I've ever beat Nethack was when I savescummed through the game.

Now this is a sin the Yama can relate to. For your penance, you must get as far as you can as a female Healer, and post results.

I accidentally a whole bottle of tropical strength manuka honey, the whole bottle, is this bad?

It is indeed very bad. For your penance, mix together a glass of milk with Pepsi, and down the whole thing in one go. Post photos to prove you have done this.

Some days ago I let Tails die by drowning when I was playing Sonic 2 , what should I do to save my damned soul?

How could you do that to Tails?! For your penance, you must make a drawing in the style of Chris-chan, of Sonic saving Tails from drowning.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Molten on November 17, 2012, 06:31:13 PM
This is understandable, but must be atoned for. For your penance, you must play this game (http://www.zefrank.com/memory/) until you achieve a percentage of 75% or higher, and post results.
Oh lord, this is gonna take so much time. I have tried twice so far and have only scored around 30%.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: FinnKaenbyou on November 17, 2012, 06:38:55 PM
>Beat Ninja Gaiden

Given that attempting this previously led to something resembling a mental breakdown, can I request a less impossible challenge?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 17, 2012, 06:53:57 PM
Oh lord, this is gonna take so much time. I have tried twice so far and have only scored around 30%.

Let's say 50%.

>Beat Ninja Gaiden

Given that attempting this previously led to something resembling a mental breakdown, can I request a less impossible challenge?

Fine, write a Ninja Gaiden fanfic.

Less whining, more penancing!
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: UncertainJakutten on November 17, 2012, 07:01:32 PM
Let's say 50%.

Fine, write a Ninja Gaiden fanfic.

Less whining, more penancing!

50% is significantly more doable, I just managed it myself. Incidentally, that's a fun little memory game. There's a little more challenge in assigning "values" to the animations, which is probably the trick to it.

Also I am totally perfect and never sin ever =D. Aren't I a perfect little angel <3?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Seppo Hovi on November 17, 2012, 07:06:46 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/5eus0.png)

-

I'll get something that's actually focused on grazing on monday. You'll have to be content with this for now.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Dular on November 17, 2012, 07:32:54 PM
Let's say 50%.

When you beat the game, the game says that score is given between 30 and 40%.  Getting anything above those appears to be impossible :V
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Molten on November 17, 2012, 07:34:00 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/hFuWV.png)
I did it, it only took a number of tries which I forgot didn't count. That said, it was a pretty cool looking memory game.

When you beat the game, the game says that score is given between 30 and 40%.  Getting anything above those appears to be impossible :V
Nope, it just says that the average scores are between 30-40%.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: BT on November 17, 2012, 07:35:34 PM
When you beat the game, the game says that score is given between 30 and 40%.  Getting anything above those appears to be impossible :V
No, that's just the average. I got 52% on my first try. Speaking of which, I got 42% on my second try and 39% on my third. It's a tad luck-based.

I have failed to come up with a sin.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Conqueror on November 17, 2012, 07:41:18 PM
My greatest desire is to be punished mercilessly by Eiki-sama.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Dular on November 17, 2012, 09:16:47 PM

This is getting very meta for the Yama. For your penance, go to Metacritic and select one movie review, arguing why they are wrong.


I have to make an account to make a review.  That is way too hard, so I guess I'll just go to hell :V
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 17, 2012, 09:32:00 PM
I have to make an account to make a review.  That is way too hard, so I guess I'll just go to hell :V

What? No. You read a review on Metacritic, and then review it here, arguing why it's wrong.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Ikari on November 17, 2012, 09:44:17 PM
Well, it took a while but I managed to think of a great vegan recipe!

http://gyazo.com/74a011db9a15099674d1d23b6b321b2b

The Macguffin

Ingredients
- A potato
- 100 grams of imagination

Steps
1) Take a potato
2) Put it on the plate
3) Voil?!
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Yatakarasu on November 17, 2012, 10:08:11 PM
Yama-sama, you skipped me... :I Stop being so drunk

Fine, I'll come up with something else.
Uh. When I type I use way too many ellipses...
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Dular on November 17, 2012, 10:25:36 PM
What? No. You read a review on Metacritic, and then review it here, arguing why it's wrong.

That doesn't seem so bad then.  Also: I have this massive tendency to misinterpret.  Fitting considering I'm an idiot deity.


I have read a review for Twilight: Breaking Dawn part 2.  As you can imagine, the critic I read gave it a 38.  Boooo.

But wait Twilight fans, this movie is much better than what you think!  While admittingly some moments are slightly lackluster, Twilight: Breaking Dawn part 2 ends the soap opera and tries something better; by making Bella a vampire!  Now she is infinitely better, no longer inhibited by her weaknesses of a human, now she can join Edward in kicking vampire ass.  With much better dialogue(The best being "Nessie?  You named my baby after the Lochness monster?") and the villianous vampires giving off a very strong and commanding presence of.. Well, vampires, I think everyone who has read the Twilight series will be happy with this final installment.

One moment in particular has Bella testing out her new vampire skills.  As she gracefully bounds across an entire mountain and goes about messing up a mountain lions day, a hiker calls for help!  Immediately she rushes over.  Most would imagine she wants to save him, to show she still has her humanity.  She does otherwise.  I cannot say more than that.

The actors are a bit more pro-active as well, trying to actually act!  Amazingly, they pull off a good job of conveying the emotions they want to show, even though most of the time, the vampires are trying to show smugness.  But honestly, what do you expect?  If you were awesome, wouldn't you be smirking and lording over everyone?

This movie isn't for everyone, I admit, and the CGI wolves still don't look good after half a decade of possible improvement, and sometimes the actors are a little stiff, but in this final film, somewhat famous for simple sparks... Well the films turned out to be a fuse, and this movie is the culminating fireworks.  And it's the best you could hope for, at least out of the Twilight series.


And that's why this critic is wrong.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: marukyuu on November 17, 2012, 10:29:57 PM
The sin of shyness, I see. For your penance, you must go to the board where you lurk the least and make five substantial, contributive, non-spammy posts.
That would be PSL.
I never, ever, ever stop by that board. I irrationally hate fanfics.
This penance might be painful and mind-opening at the same time. I'll see what I can do.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: pineyappled on November 17, 2012, 10:32:41 PM
Seems to be a lot of this going around. For your penance, you must post a photo of the least clean room in your home, clean it, and then post another photo showing the results.
(http://i.imgur.com/jb0Fh.jpg)
(http://i.imgur.com/wPXP2.jpg)
c-close enough right
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Raikaria on November 17, 2012, 10:52:05 PM
THE TELL-TALE HEART 2
By Michael Bay

The officers look astounded, disgusted, and maddened upon the sight of the deed. Yet the beating grows louder still. The sound grows louder, and louder, the ticking watch-like sound...

Then, a sound so loud it feels like it would have burst my eardrums, and a flash of light, knocking me aside with a mighty force. The three officers are knocked over as well. Maybe it's the house that's cursed, maybe I should leave, yes, that'll get me away from whatever is making this infernal noise!

I get up, and see a hole blown clean in the wall, embers burning, smoke plumeing. What could have caused this? I don't know, but I have to get away from the noise... so I jump out of the window.

As I hit the ground, there is another explosion, the house is blown apart, and I am sent flying into the wall of the next house, stunned, winded, and feeling acute pain. There is no sign of the officers escaping. The sound has changed, an infernal ringing now, drowning out everything else.

Enough! I want the noise to end! A life for a life! That is what must happen! I await, and hear a ticking come through the ringing...

A flash of light.

A blast of blame and force.

Silence and darkness.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Suikama on November 17, 2012, 11:34:27 PM
Agh, I'll atone my sin as soon as I can
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: NekoNekoRex on November 17, 2012, 11:37:31 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/c3rY1.png)
Can't win with this chick unless I find an altar to sacrifice for a decent artifact weapon...
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Bio on November 17, 2012, 11:43:36 PM
I still don't like her hat.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tamashii Kanjou on November 17, 2012, 11:59:27 PM
Yama-sama, you skipped me... :I Stop being so drunk

Fine, I'll come up with something else.

Hmm. What was yours again?

I think "U.N. Owen was Her?" and "Septette for the Dead Princess" are just OK songs.

You know, if you were able to do music-related stuff, I'd tell you to create a track that features these two songs, and post it in here.
But something tells me Shikieiki will tell me off; saying that sort of thing is best saved for contests and such. That and I'm not the Yama. ;)

In other news, it seems the good Yama was so drunk busy last night that she didn't bat an eye lid to Shino's misadventures. I shall wait for your judgment, Shikieiki~
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Menorah Jams, Pham on November 18, 2012, 12:35:31 AM
(http://www.nndb.com/people/281/000024209/dawkins.jpg)
+
(http://www.modacity.net/forums/styles/smilies/emot-smug.gif)
=
(http://i.imgur.com/TSGw2.jpg)
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Pesco on November 18, 2012, 12:38:56 AM
Quote
The Yama is confused. Can you clarify your sin here?

(http://puu.sh/1rmmL)
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Fetch()tirade on November 18, 2012, 01:08:03 AM
Judging by how much I like to tease my friends, I have come to the conclusion I am a slight sadist. What do
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Alfred F. Jones on November 18, 2012, 01:14:27 AM
I still burst out laughing every time I read this (http://usuallydead.com/archive/stories/askyuyuko/07042008.html).
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Yatakarasu on November 18, 2012, 01:35:19 AM
You know, if you were able to do music-related stuff, I'd tell you to create a track that features these two songs, and post it in here.
But something tells me Shikieiki will tell me off; saying that sort of thing is best saved for contests and such. That and I'm not the Yama. ;)
Sounds like something the Yama would make me do.
Well...I do have access to Soundtrack Pro (cause I'm a DMA student)...ugh, but I'm not a sound editor/musician. When I have time (bahaha that's a laugh) I'll see what I can do.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Kaze_Senshi on November 18, 2012, 02:03:13 AM
That doesn't seem so bad then.  Also: I have this massive tendency to misinterpret.  Fitting considering I'm an idiot deity.
I have read a review for Twilight: Breaking Dawn part 2.  As you can imagine, the critic I read gave it a 38.  Boooo.

But wait Twilight fans, this movie is much better than what you think!  While admittingly some moments are slightly lackluster, Twilight: Breaking Dawn part 2 ends the soap opera and tries something  ...
You should mark this one as spoiler, someone could be a fan of twilight here  :V


Well, it took a while but I managed to think of a great vegan recipe!
This recipe let me with green-recipe jealousy  :V


How could you do that to Tails?! For your penance, you must make a drawing in the style of Chris-chan, of Sonic saving Tails from drowning.

(http://imageshack.us/a/img831/4687/tailssave.jpg)

Sorry, I couldn't resist. But here is, Sonic ran away and forsook Tails, when he was almost drowning Chris-chan came with one bubble-shield over your head ( Chris-chan your neck is so strong ). With this shield Tails could breath underwater, but Chris couldn't.

R.I.P. Chris-chan :~


Aaaahhhhhhhhhh Yama-sama, now I noticed that I misunderstood your instructions and I draw with Chris from Sonic X saving Tails lololol, please use your imagination and think that Chris is Sonic  :V



Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Vyrien on November 18, 2012, 02:04:53 AM
Also I am totally perfect and never sin ever =D. Aren't I a perfect little angel <3?

Believing oneself to be perfect is pride. Pride is a sin!


I play Touhou for the characters and the dialogue...I actually despise STGs! Please forgive me for this deception Yama-sama.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Vhaltz on November 18, 2012, 02:14:25 AM
It's becoming a habit to use the 10 hour loop of BrodyQuest x I'm so fresh you can suck my nuts as background working music.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: JT on November 18, 2012, 02:33:31 AM
OK, here's a real sin. Fuck nun-bludgeoning,
I actually made one of these things. (http://oi46.tinypic.com/lwqhz.jpg)
Yeah, that's right. Feel that edge.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Jana on November 18, 2012, 02:41:57 AM
Mugi's Eyebrows are certainly an eye-opening choice.

I think my sin is the opposite; I don't love enough to have a list full of animated ladies! doushio
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Aba Matindesu! on November 18, 2012, 03:59:33 AM
;~;
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: [Y]oukai [J]esus on November 18, 2012, 04:31:10 AM
(http://puu.sh/1rmmL)

Your goal is in despair!
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Hello Purvis on November 18, 2012, 04:55:03 AM
Ah, an all-too common sin. For your penance, you must think of a game which you do not like and give us 5 sincerely good qualities about said game.

Kingdom Hearts
-Did take the idea of the crazy cutscene battle to a new level.
-Does have some nice graphics for its era.
-Does have some alright music.
-Has a plot that is interesting enough to draw people in despite the initial WTF nature of its premise

THIS IS HARD

-Probably helped bring attention to some older FF characters who need more love.

Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: NekoNekoRex on November 18, 2012, 06:47:43 AM
I tried to play Healer about twenty more times but then I realized that trying to get down to Minetown at level 1 is the absolutely most aggravating thing I could possibly do in Nethack. Even my pet had enough when it FUCKING SCUICIDED TWELVE TIMES IN A ROW
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: pasu on November 18, 2012, 06:50:34 AM
Lady Enma, I have sinned! Despite being a fan of the games, I've yet to score a no-continues non-easy clear in any touhou game! Well, except PoFV
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Oldmansour on November 18, 2012, 10:18:57 AM
In my youth, I once believed the Go-Bots cartoon was superior to that of the Transformers.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: qMyon on November 18, 2012, 11:34:34 AM
Okay, let's give this a shot.

I.....um.....let me see.........okay, how about this? I got distracted playing mahjong when I was supposed to be playing with my clan in MWO.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Iryan on November 18, 2012, 12:35:53 PM
How revolting. Clearly, your diet is lacking and in need of some serious improvement. For your penance, you are to make a salad and eat it, posting Before and After photos of the salad (yes, the second photo will clearly be of an empty bowl and not the salad itself.)
Hmmm...

Hmmmmmmm...

If it contains beans and cabbage it counts as a salad, right?


[attach=1]


Riiiiiiiiiiight?


[attach=2]
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Vyrien on November 18, 2012, 12:43:21 PM
Iryan, what exactly is that? It looks rather appetising yet somehow faintly disturbing.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: FinnKaenbyou on November 18, 2012, 01:27:54 PM
Fine, write a Ninja Gaiden fanfic.

Less whining, more penancing!
"Hey, Frank. Can I ask you something?"

Frank growled. He hated being shadowed by the new employees. They were walking piles of questions, and he was supposed to answer every little query they had with a smile on his face. His hands clung tighter to his rifle.

"What is it, Mike?"

"Well, I was wondering. Where does that go?" Mike pointed to one side of the open ledge they shared. The drop continued down deeper than either man could see, seemingly into nothingness.

"Not important." Frank checked his magazine on instinct. Full. Good. "What matters is that Hayabusa won't survive it."

Mike raised an eyebrow. "If he's some sort of super-ninja, what makes us think that he'll have trouble with one pit?"

"Dude, have you seen the guys over in 3-1? Apparently these ninjas can't handle little ponds of water."

"I guess." Mike looked away, with that pensive look that inevitably meant another question was coming. Frank braced himself in advance.

"So why is security here tougher than all those other places? I mean, most evil fortresses are well-guarded, but..." Mike pointed to the ledge, and the never-ending supply of bats emerging from the side. "Stuff like that just seems a little unfair. How is anyone supposed to get past that kinda defense?"

Frank felt his blood pressure quadruple. It took all his restraint not to grab the scrawny little kid and let him see just where that pit ended up. He clenched his teeth, feeling a decayed tooth shift beneath the pressure.

"What kind of fucking question is that? We don't want Hayabusa taking back the demon statues, so we're making sure he doesn't get in. That's what security does. It's not about being fair."

Mike pouted. "But I feel like we're being sort of mean to the guy. I mean, he's just one ninja, and we're a never-ending army of better-armed soldiers. Hell, didn't Hayabusa get knocked out by some random chick?"

"That was a cutscene. It doesn't count." (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aRLqwsXebHQ&feature=player_detailpage#t=83s) Frank spoke bluntly and with a hint of aggression. He shifted the rifle barrel in Mike's direction just in case the newcomer didn't get the point.

"Jeez, alright. Just asking." Mike rolled his eyes, looking in the direction of the entrance before he stopped in place. "Wait, isn't that-"

Frank followed the newcomer's glance. A dot was making its way up the mountain, leaping from platform to platform and slicing through everything in its path.

Hayabusa!

"Alright, kid, remember the plan." Frank fell on one knee, pointing his rifle forward. "When Hayabusa's distracted from taking out the bats, you charge into him and make him fall into the pit."

"Eh? But won't I fall in too?"

"Who's the superior officer here, you or me?" Frank growled. "Just fucking do it!"

Mike gulped, grabbing his backpack for dear life. As the ninja leaped onto the ledge, sword twirling about in a beautiful arc, Mike charged into him with full force. The young soldier had just enough time to see the sword coming down before he exploded in a shower of points.

"Now!"

Frank made the most of the opening, firing at Hayabusa as he landed. The ninja had no chance to dodge, taking the bullet and falling backwards into the pit. A droning medley (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lGzRf13laCM) announced the ninja's passing.

"Yes!" Frank pumped his fist. "I am so getting promoted for that."
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 18, 2012, 01:36:48 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/hFuWV.png)
I did it, it only took a number of tries which I forgot didn't count. That said, it was a pretty cool looking memory game.

Congratulations, Molten! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

My greatest desire is to be punished mercilessly by Eiki-sama.

What a strange sin to confess. So be it - your penance is to draw the Punisher and the Yama having a picnic.

Well, it took a while but I managed to think of a great vegan recipe!

http://gyazo.com/74a011db9a15099674d1d23b6b321b2b

The Macguffin

Ingredients
- A potato
- 100 grams of imagination

Steps
1) Take a potato
2) Put it on the plate
3) Voil?!

Wow. That is one half-assed don't-care "attempt". Clearly, you are a person who wants to go to Hell. Wish granted! Away with you, to the howling depths of the abyss, where demons will tear your soul apart forever.

Yama-sama, you skipped me... :I Stop being so drunk

The Yama apologizes. A good penance idea was raised for you - making an arrange with those two songs. Bear in mind that it need not be mindblowing, Alstroemeria Records-level remixing; just so long as you try.


Congratulations, Dular! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

(http://i.imgur.com/jb0Fh.jpg)
(http://i.imgur.com/wPXP2.jpg)
c-close enough right

Congratulations, kinoko! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.


Congratulations, Raikaria! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

(http://i.imgur.com/c3rY1.png)
Can't win with this chick unless I find an altar to sacrifice for a decent artifact weapon...

Nonetheless, you did as asked. Congratulations, NekoNekoRex! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

(http://www.nndb.com/people/281/000024209/dawkins.jpg)
+
(http://www.modacity.net/forums/styles/smilies/emot-smug.gif)
=
(http://i.imgur.com/TSGw2.jpg)

Uncanny!
Congratulations, MJP! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

Judging by how much I like to tease my friends, I have come to the conclusion I am a slight sadist. What do

For your penance, you must draw a picture of Tenshi punishing you. Bonus points if a soup ladle is involved.

I still burst out laughing every time I read this (http://usuallydead.com/archive/stories/askyuyuko/07042008.html).

Understandable, but very regrettable. For your penance, you must write an IRC conversation involving at least five members of #s-l wherein the actual Komachi shows up mid-conversation.


This, despite not being exactly what I asked for, amused the Yama enough to qualify. Congratulations! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

I play Touhou for the characters and the dialogue...I actually despise STGs! Please forgive me for this deception Yama-sama.

The sin of deception shall be treated with the virtue of honesty! For your penance, you are to make an honest attempt of a Lunatic pacifist run of UFO, going as far as you can without continues, and then upload your replay here.

It's becoming a habit to use the 10 hour loop of BrodyQuest x I'm so fresh you can suck my nuts as background working music.

This isn't a sin so much as a clear sign of something malfunctioning. You are in need of immediate medical attention.

OK, here's a real sin. Fuck nun-bludgeoning,
I actually made one of these things. (http://oi46.tinypic.com/lwqhz.jpg)
Yeah, that's right. Feel that edge.

Oh, no. Not you, JT?! Very well - for your penance, you must compose, record, and upload a song using voice and acoustic guitar with lyrics that fawns over Mugi.

I think my sin is the opposite; I don't love enough to have a list full of animated ladies! doushio

Ah, the sin of being a casual. For your penance, you must watch both episodes of Eiken and write a review not exceeding 400 words that employs the words "nipple-bleedingly" at some point.


Congratulations, Beats! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.


Congratulations, Purvis! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

Lady Enma, I have sinned! Despite being a fan of the games, I've yet to score a no-continues non-easy clear in any touhou game! Well, except PoFV

Wow, not even Imperishable Night - but you could with PoFV? How curious. For your penance, you must then attempt IN Normal, using Border Team, and upload the replay here.

In my youth, I once believed the Go-Bots cartoon was superior to that of the Transformers.

A hipster at such a tender age, eh? Let's see if you can identify your own kind. This (http://styleblaster.net/) website takes photos of people walking through Williamsburg, New York, one of the glowing meccas of hipsterdom. For your penance, you must find a photo of someone you consider a hipster, and explain what makes them one.

Okay, let's give this a shot.

I.....um.....let me see.........okay, how about this? I got distracted playing mahjong when I was supposed to be playing with my clan in MWO.

Ah, the sin of distraction. For your penance, you must play Concentration (http://www.shockwave.com/gamelanding/concentration.jsp) on Hard mode, and post results when you win more than $10,000.


That is indeed a salad! Congratulations, Iryan! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.


As always, this exceeded my expectations.
Congratulations, Rou! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: trancehime on November 18, 2012, 02:36:01 PM
forgive me judge, for i have sinned

my soul has been burned by the foul flame of failure, tainted by the sordid stench of sorrow

may my penance for such transgressions be gradual; for i have fallen into incredibly tough times, and cannot make time to instantly perform my rites within such timely fashion.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Error on November 18, 2012, 02:48:05 PM
I have questions, but not confessions. or do i
Does the definition of sin vary?
If a person lives an unsavory lifestyle because they don't know of any others, will they be punished?
If a person lives an unsavory lifestyle because they preferred it over others, will they be punished?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: JT on November 18, 2012, 03:10:13 PM
Oh, no. Not you, JT?! Very well - for your penance, you must compose, record, and upload a song using voice and acoustic guitar with lyrics that fawns over Mugi.
OH, GOD DAMN YOU! None of you better use this as blackmail material when it's finished.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: qMyon on November 18, 2012, 03:10:46 PM
Okay, that was tough. Honestly though, I had more trouble getting all the prizes to add up to more than 10 000 and then solving the riddle at the end.
[attach=1]
[attach=2]
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 18, 2012, 03:32:25 PM
forgive me judge, for i have sinned

my soul has been burned by the foul flame of failure, tainted by the sordid stench of sorrow

may my penance for such transgressions be gradual; for i have fallen into incredibly tough times, and cannot make time to instantly perform my rites within such timely fashion.

The Yama understands - this mundane world unfortunately has its own rites and rituals which much be attended, too. But as failure and sorrow seem to go hand-in-hand, we shall confront both at once: for your penance, you will draw for us a figurative representation of the last time you were truly happy. You don't have to explain for us what it is, if it's something very personal, but it should convey happiness and success.

I have questions, but not confessions. or do i
Does the definition of sin vary?
If a person lives an unsavory lifestyle because they don't know of any others, will they be punished?
If a person lives an unsavory lifestyle because they preferred it over others, will they be punished?

The Yama enjoys philosowank as much as the next person, but let's not overthink this - as stated in the OP, this is more or less about something you said or did that made you feel guilt or shame; something that you believe is a personal sin.

OH, GOD DAMN YOU! None of you better use this as blackmail material when it's finished.

How could you possibly be blackmailed for singing an originally composed song of love and devotion for a moe anime character? Surely this should be a point of great pride!

:justasplanned:

Okay, that was tough. Honestly though, I had more trouble getting all the prizes to add up to more than 10 000 and then solving the riddle at the end.

Congratulations, Myon! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: NekoNekoRex on November 18, 2012, 03:55:25 PM
I have more sin  :ohdear:
I have a green-eyed jealousy for JT and his incredible aptitude for humor. Also, he can draw.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: fondue on November 18, 2012, 04:00:27 PM
i ate a four-leafed clover once
:c
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Aba Matindesu! on November 18, 2012, 04:55:21 PM
Oh, Miss Enma, your kindness is too much! For I have sinned. Yet. Again. "OTL

I swore in the presence of my crush's family. WHAT DO.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: I have no name on November 18, 2012, 05:32:42 PM
I inadvertently caused someone to blow up (complete with a huge bevy of insults directed at me) and leave a Skype group  :ohdear:
At least I can take solace in knowing that I recognized my mistake and tried to correct it and never resorted to personal attacks.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: JT on November 18, 2012, 05:44:04 PM
How could you possibly be blackmailed for singing an originally composed song of love and devotion for a moe anime character? Surely this should be a point of great pride!

:justasplanned:
OK, I decided to bend the Yama's request a bit and do a mostly improvised parody of a certain well-known pop song (http://kiwi6.com/file/d6ai73if89) instead. It's not originally composed or acoustic, but hopefully this will cut the Yama's mustard regardless.

Lyrics:
Okay. Let's get this over with.
Alright, I'm ready.
I WAS BORN READY! LET'S DO THIS!
MUGI! YEARH

Eating some cake
I don't know what
I'm to say I don't speak anime
Today's another day to find you
Shying away
Nothing happens in this show anyway
Cake on me, cake me on
Moogy-chon
In the Keionbu

Agh
How does he do that

This is...
I can't believe I'm doing this.
I hate all of you.

Oh the things that you say
Is it life or
Anime my worries away
What the fuck's the deal with
your eyebrows
You're shying away
If you were a dude I'd be gay

Hey Mugi, K me on
Moogy-chon
In the KeionBUUUUUUUUUUUUGHRH
UGH
ARHGBS

I'll be gone
In a DAAAAAAAAAAYYDSGJBS

Alright, I'm done.
Fuck you.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Yatakarasu on November 18, 2012, 07:11:07 PM
Me: "Oh, look free time!'
2 hours later (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5LRFUP3XfsI)
Well, that was fun.

FLAN! Why your song no have consistent tempo (or at the very least sound consistent)?!
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Jana on November 18, 2012, 08:15:30 PM
Ah, the sin of being a casual. For your penance, you must watch both episodes of Eiken and write a review not exceeding 400 words that employs the words "nipple-bleedingly" at some point.

I never thought I'd say this, but it's a good thing I've already watched both episodes of Eiken!

A breast anime for breast fetishist of the most extreme kind, Eiken is an anime OVA series about a schoolboy and the breasts he touches. These walking breasts are attached to girls who might otherwise be likable anime caricatures of the usual personality types, including the shy girl, the smart girl, and the girl who'll kick your ass. The main schoolboy himself, named Densuke, is also a usual loser protagonist who can't seem to help being thrown into "wacky" situations that involve breasts and touching breasts and being crushed by breasts.

After a breast-touch of particularly bad fortune involving his shy, best-student-in-the-school crush, Densuke is drafted into the infamous Eiken club by the tomboy breasts in order to compete in a competition between all the other school clubs. The competition itself is filled with breasts and innuendo of the most vile sort, from eating chocolate bananas in a pool of perverted eels, bungee-jumping at nipple-bleedingly high speeds, to the memetic yogurt slide, complete with yogurt-splattered breasts. Of course, in the end, Densuke gets the breasts he's been after the whole time in a completely non-explicit way.

I have never seen an anime explore the concept of breasts in such a way. You might be better off watching an actual hentai film than this fanservice breast-fest. If you've ever complained about anime being misogynistic with its emphasis on the breasts of young women, or for any other reason, you should stay far and away from Eiken.

245 words, 15 breast(s), 1 nipple-bleedingly, 2 Vietnam-style flashbacks.

OK, I decided to bend the Yama's request a bit and do a mostly improvised parody of a certain well-known pop song (http://kiwi6.com/file/d6ai73if89) instead. It's not originally composed or acoustic, but hopefully this will cut the Yama's mustard regardless.

I feel pride well within me and I do not know why.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on November 18, 2012, 08:16:54 PM
Wait, how the Hell were there only FIFTEEN bre---

You know what? On second thought, I don't wanna know. :getdown:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Fetch()tirade on November 18, 2012, 08:20:19 PM

You must upload this to your YT channel so your glorious mastery of the lyrical arts may be known throughout the world.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Menorah Jams, Pham on November 18, 2012, 09:31:36 PM
Uncanny!
Congratulations, MJP! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

Except now I feel like a bad religio-Jew despite living the cultura-Jew lifestyle.  Plus there's no Paradise either in Judaism or an afterli-

/me is shot
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: HakureiSM on November 18, 2012, 09:40:18 PM
OK, I decided to bend the Yama's request a bit and do a mostly improvised parody of a certain well-known pop song (http://kiwi6.com/file/d6ai73if89) instead. It's not originally composed or acoustic, but hopefully this will cut the Yama's mustard regardless.
My fucking god if I were gay JT would be the stuff of wet dreams

Fuckit JT is already the stuff of wet dreams, no homo
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: LadyScarlet on November 18, 2012, 10:02:37 PM
Alright, here's my short fanfic:

Tewi hugged Aya. The tengu was just too adorable to resist. Seeing this as an opportunity for new feedback on the newspaper, Aya took a picture of Tewi's breasts.
"Flat chest tries to molest Aya?!" read the headline. The reaction was just as lukewarm as ever, except moon rabbits invaded Aya's house shortly afterwards out of rage. The end.

I have a new sin: I left my math homework at school.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: nintendonut888 on November 18, 2012, 10:20:10 PM
You are indeed. You know, Jack Black is said to have said that "YOLO is 'carpe diem' for stupid people." The phrase "carpe diem" first gained pop culture attention in the movie Dead Poet's Society, starring Robin Williams. While that was a great role and a great movie, he also played the eponymous main character of one of the worst movies ever made, Patch Adams. Your penance is to compose a 10-stanza kenning wherein Patch Adams tries to cheer up Gengetsu on her deathbed.

Oh wait I was actually supposed to do this?

Uhm...not to be all defiant miss Yama-dude, sir, lady, but I don't know anything about this Patch Adams. So I can't repent in this manner, sorry. :[
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Ikari on November 18, 2012, 10:26:41 PM
OK, I decided to bend the Yama's request a bit and do a mostly improvised parody of a certain well-known pop song (http://kiwi6.com/file/d6ai73if89) instead. It's not originally composed or acoustic, but hopefully this will cut the Yama's mustard regardless.

This is absolutely beautiful. Seriously, you go beyond heaven with that.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Jam-Kiske on November 18, 2012, 11:32:36 PM
OK, here's a real sin. Fuck nun-bludgeoning,
I actually made one of these things. (http://oi46.tinypic.com/lwqhz.jpg)
Yeah, that's right. Feel that edge.
Oh I made one of those too. It has 2 Homestuck characters in it. (https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/61260_10152242609375207_1340088771_n.jpg)
I feel like that's enough of a sin.

Also JT you're godlike.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: HakureiSM on November 18, 2012, 11:37:49 PM
Okay let's do this shit

(http://i45.tinypic.com/2rdhovp.jpg)
This is stupid.


(http://i47.tinypic.com/23ua2js.jpg)
This is fucking stupid.


(http://i50.tinypic.com/ja9nh5.jpg)
This was plain stupid. Ammy, listen: you're stupid. And I hate you.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Minch on November 18, 2012, 11:52:27 PM
I consider my older Step-Brother as an enemy. Let's see if I can think of five good qualities from him.
- He is brutally honest.
- He trusts his intuition instead of other's opinion.
- He has great luck in finding sales.
- He is rather on time in returning favors and payment when it is due.
- Even though his sense of humor is questionable, he can be pretty funny.

God damn that was hard. There you go, oh great Yama of Paradise. Five great qualties of one of my enemies.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 19, 2012, 12:02:16 AM
I have more sin  :ohdear:
I have a green-eyed jealousy for JT and his incredible aptitude for humor. Also, he can draw.

Jealousy is a classic sin, but one easily atoned for. For your penance, you must create and post an example of humor - written, drawn, sung, anything at all.

i ate a four-leafed clover once
:c

The Yama isn't even sure this is a sin. Shouldn't you now be lucky all the time? You ought to share your good fortune with the rest of us - for your penance, you must draw and post a scene from Lucky Star (http://www.crunchyroll.com/lucky-star).

Oh, Miss Enma, your kindness is too much! For I have sinned. Yet. Again. "OTL

I swore in the presence of my crush's family. WHAT DO.

This is technically a sin; I mean, unless your family swears worse than you do. Either way, you need to atone, and for your penance, you will invent a new swear word, and define it. This is the swear word you will use from the next 40 days.

I inadvertently caused someone to blow up (complete with a huge bevy of insults directed at me) and leave a Skype group  :ohdear:
At least I can take solace in knowing that I recognized my mistake and tried to correct it and never resorted to personal attacks.

It sounds like you need to learn a little something about diplomacy! To this end, you should learn from the master: Henry Kissinger (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Henry_Kissinger). Post a Skype conversation with Mr. Kissinger, wherein he asks your advice on how to handle increasing tensions between the North and South Vietnamese, and you provide a novel solution.


This definitely makes up for the 3x3, and the self-loathing you garnished the delicacy with was the parsley on the steak. Congratulations, JT! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.


Hey, that wasn't half bad! Congratulations, Yatakarasu! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.


This is the most glowing review of Eiken made since Kilga gave it a Masterpiece ranking on ANN. Congratulations, Jana! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

Except now I feel like a bad religio-Jew despite living the cultura-Jew lifestyle.  Plus there's no Paradise either in Judaism or an afterli-

/me is shot

Hey, you're having your cake and eating, too - that's a pretty sweet deal! Although the Yama has never understood this phrase: what else are you going to do with a cake you have? Anyways


While you are atoned for breaking the figma, you now have to atone for forgetting your math homework by solving the next math problem someone posts in this thread.

Oh wait I was actually supposed to do this?

Uhm...not to be all defiant miss Yama-dude, sir, lady, but I don't know anything about this Patch Adams. So I can't repent in this manner, sorry. :[

Oh, well, in that case, here's all you need to know about Patch Adams: he is a doctor who works with terminally ill patients, and has an annoyingly sunny disposition while scolding people who are dying for feeling sorry for themselves. Problem solved!

Oh I made one of those too. It has 2 Homestuck characters in it. (https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/61260_10152242609375207_1340088771_n.jpg)
I feel like that's enough of a sin.

The Yama agrees! For your penance, you must create a seven-panel comic in the style of Homestuck where one of the characters involved is Link from Zelda.

This was plain stupid. Ammy, listen: you're stupid. And I hate you.

You're welcome! I hope it tasted great. Congratulations, Haku! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.


Well done! You clearly do possess a healthy sense of empathy, even for your greatest enemies. Congratulations, Minch! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on November 19, 2012, 12:09:19 AM
You're welcome! I hope it tasted great. Congratulations, Haku! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

A pure heart and a churning stomach. :getdown:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: HakureiSM on November 19, 2012, 12:09:54 AM
It tasted like shit

Like a beer milkshake or something

My stomach burns with a passionate rage
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Jana on November 19, 2012, 12:42:42 AM
This is the most glowing review of Eiken made since Kilga gave it a Masterpiece ranking on ANN.

(http://i.imgur.com/ZbwVC.png)
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Oldmansour on November 19, 2012, 12:49:11 AM
What is a 'hipster'?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Yatakarasu on November 19, 2012, 01:00:13 AM
Hey, that wasn't half bad! Congratulations, Yatakarasu! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.
Thanks! I found soundboard on my computer and was like "That will work." Then I spent a half an hour trying to figure it out.  :getdown:

Now I want to tweak it and make it better...but homework.

It tasted like shit
Like a beer milkshake or something
My stomach burns with a passionate rage
But when you enter Paradise now, it will be full of honey!
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on November 19, 2012, 01:11:50 AM
Tengu-yama, I'm not honest with myself.

I complain about so much of Touhou fandom being obsessed with memes and cheap humor, and then I go and do things like Byakuren reacting to a double rainbow (http://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=31036424), Mokou out-swagging Kaguya (http://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=30247884), and increasingly ridiculous theories about Sakuya's origins. (http://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=30995906)

How can I find my personal compass on this matter?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: nintendonut888 on November 19, 2012, 01:33:29 AM
Quote
Oh, well, in that case, here's all you need to know about Patch Adams: he is a doctor who works with terminally ill patients, and has an annoyingly sunny disposition while scolding people who are dying for feeling sorry for themselves. Problem solved!

Oh, okay. But now I don't know what a Kenning is. And now that I looked it up, I don't even know how you would make a compound description into a stanza poem.

Repentance is hard. :fail:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: pineyappled on November 19, 2012, 02:25:24 AM
I just watched this (http://www.hulu.com/watch/426532#i1,p0,d1).


Help me, Yama, for my jimmies are rustled.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: HakureiSM on November 19, 2012, 02:31:56 AM
Sorry, currently our video library can only be watched from within the United States
Fuck Hulu.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: pineyappled on November 19, 2012, 02:33:25 AM
Fuck Hulu.
shitty SNL sketch
tl;dr "hurr hawkeye is useless xD"
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: I have no name on November 19, 2012, 02:45:49 AM
It sounds like you need to learn a little something about diplomacy!
But I -was- diplomatic about it  ???
The other guy was a complete jerk and I'm not sorry to have seen him go  :ohdear: <--the actual 'sin'

Also:
Henry: yo i need help
Me: Use duct tape.
Henry: kthxbai
 :justasplanned:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: JT on November 19, 2012, 02:51:34 AM
shitty SNL sketch
Redundant phrase.

Actually, there was one recent thing they did with Louis CK that I liked. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tbzfvef0aE0) It's pretty much just a miniature version of his show though, so I'm not sure if that really counts.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: pineyappled on November 19, 2012, 02:59:06 AM
I don't watch SNL. Is it always that bad?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: JT on November 19, 2012, 03:04:25 AM
My understanding is that it's been consistently awful for about 20 years now.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Zil on November 19, 2012, 04:07:12 AM
While you are atoned for breaking the figma, you now have to atone for forgetting your math homework by solving the next math problem someone posts in this thread.
Here you go:

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs are to be seated in a straight line across the front of a stage. Assuming each is assigned a specific seat, how many different ways can they be seated so that nobody is in the correct seat?

About sins... I've been playing Touhou with an Xbox controller.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 19, 2012, 12:20:34 PM
How can I find my personal compass on this matter?

You can start by doing the first penance (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,13767.msg911862.html#msg911862) the Yama gave you three pages ago for your first sin, and hold back on posting more sins for now.

Oh, okay. But now I don't know what a Kenning is. And now that I looked it up, I don't even know how you would make a compound description into a stanza poem.

Repentance is hard. :fail:

Couplets, man. Just go AA, BB, CC, etc. Kennings are super-easy. You just write stuff like "spirit-shatterer" for "danmaku" or "sadness rain" for "tears" and stuff like that. Come on now, you're more than capable - we believe in you!

I just watched this (http://www.hulu.com/watch/426532#i1,p0,d1).


Help me, Yama, for my jimmies are rustled.

Yeah, recent SNL is garbage. Your rustled jimmies are perfectly understandable. Rather than give you penance, I would rather give you an antidote. In this case, I recommend searching "70s SNL" on YouTube. Post the first sketch that makes you laugh in this thread, to share with the rest of us.

But I -was- diplomatic about it  ???
The other guy was a complete jerk and I'm not sorry to have seen him go  :ohdear: <--the actual 'sin'

Also:
Henry: yo i need help
Me: Use duct tape.
Henry: kthxbai
 :justasplanned:

Lame. To Hell with thee.

I've been playing Touhou with an Xbox controller.

Well you know what this means, don't you? A Lunatic no-focus run of Great Fairy Wars for your penance, of course.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Cor on November 19, 2012, 12:33:41 PM
Lady Shiki, I'm too good at procrastinating.

I found my motivation to play Touhou just when I received an assignment to read Vladimir Nabokov's Lolita for an exam on literature. I've been gaming instead of reading for the past forever and the exam is within a week. I've also considered not appearing so I could put it off for a few weeks longer until makeup exams.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Zil on November 19, 2012, 02:57:50 PM
A Lunatic no-focus run of Great Fairy Wars for your penance, of course.
Is the focusing that it forces you to do when you charge up the ice shield allowed?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: theshirn on November 19, 2012, 03:11:32 PM
Wow, that must have been incredibly difficult for you! However, this shows a lack of commitment to the reputation you've developed on this forum. Therefore, for your penance you must take this to the next level: compose a poem comprised of ten stanzas in iambic pentameter, expressing your love for the community as a whole.
Exceptionally limited internet access for the past few days means late repentance.

Shall I compare the folks of this forum?
A truly sordid task.  For they are all
Beyond compare.  Take Ruro*, as a first -
A writer, a photographer,  and more,
And TSO, and Ammy too, (but not
the Nobu, Donut, heathen fools say I -
Yet even they may be redeemed** in this).
A grand assemblage here, the internet
Has granted us this day.  So we rejoice!
For writ, in short, I say - I hate you guys***.

I think that will do.

*It is the great crime of iambic pentameter that you cannot use the word strawberries.
**No they can't.
***True story.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: HakureiSM on November 19, 2012, 03:44:45 PM

That book is way better than Touhou. Go read it.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 19, 2012, 04:15:04 PM
Lady Shiki, I'm too good at procrastinating.

I found my motivation to play Touhou just when I received an assignment to read Vladimir Nabokov's Lolita for an exam on literature. I've been gaming instead of reading for the past forever and the exam is within a week. I've also considered not appearing so I could put it off for a few weeks longer until makeup exams.

This is most unfortunate. Lolita is probably one of the most misunderstood books ever written, and is also the finest examples of "unreliable narrator" after Catcher In The Rye. But in a Touhou context, Akyuu is also a good example of an unreliable narrator. For your penance, you must write about a Touhou character in the style of Holden Caulfield. If you haven't read Catcher In The Rye, write about Nabakov in the style of Akyuu.

Is the focusing that it forces you to do when you charge up the ice shield allowed?

That's right!


Wow, that was pretty impressive! Congratulations, theshim! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Cor on November 19, 2012, 04:51:04 PM
For your penance, you must write about a Touhou character in the style of Holden Caulfield. If you haven't read Catcher In The Rye, write about Nabakov in the style of Akyuu.
Oh crap. I didn't even realize I should doubt the narrator, I just sort of read along, accepting it all. Happens to be my worst subject. Uh, I request for few months of time to read this book, Salinger's book, get into reading books in general, research unreliable narrators, study and try to find inconsistencies within Perfect Memento in Strict Sense and Symposium of Post-Mysticism 'n' whatnot else.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: theshirn on November 19, 2012, 04:58:29 PM
I require judgment for the following!
Quote
Let us not prevaricate. To be our own man, than a construct of others, is a worthy goal. To take on the trappings created by another denies our own worth, buries it beneath layers of self-pitying drivel. We can walk the line of appreciation without succumbing to slobbering adulation, and it is better to love with a critical eye than to cloud our eyes to all wrongs that it might shine the brighter - for the glow we perceive is naught but our own projection. I say to this, folly! For you may glow all the brighter if you but kindle your own flame to greatness.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Aba Matindesu! on November 19, 2012, 04:59:06 PM
mummergeiste <MUH-MUR-GAYS-TUH>
(Noune)
A Person (but onlie by the loosest of  Definitions) whose Cavitus Cranialis is Filled with, in the Steade of Knowledge with any Practicality, much Idiocie about Entertainment of a mainstream Virtue, likeupon the mummers we have so dubbed Justinne Bieberre (whose Sexualitie to this Daye remains Unclear to the Author), Maroone (Moron?) 5, One Directionne (perhaps to the Southern regions of the Sales Charts, hur hur!), Christopher Browning (with his most Shameful Intrigue with one Hannah of the Rye) and the like. See? Mummers.

The typical Mummergeiste sits about, Wasting his entire Daye thinking (should it ever require any mental Capacitie) on their (lack of) Future as a... "Wrappe Starre". (How sordid. Hath they no Shame?) Surely even such Aspirations so Ignoble are rendered Unattainable by their lacke of Talent in the Field of the Arts, Owing mostly to the Fact that they cannot "Wrappe" their Waye out of an Examination of Spellinge Consisting of Words with no more than two Syl-la-bles.

In Summarie, these Wasters of Space deserve no Quarter.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: JT on November 19, 2012, 04:59:45 PM
Oh crap. I didn't even realize I should doubt the narrator, I just sort of read along, accepting it all. Happens to be my worst subject. Uh, I request for few months of time to read this book, Salinger's book, get into reading books in general, research unreliable narrators, study and try to find inconsistencies within Perfect Memento in Strict Sense and Symposium of Post-Mysticism 'n' whatnot else.
Protip, just use the word "phony" a lot. It's pretty much sentence mortar, just sprinkle it in there anywhere you want. It's like "smurf."

e.g. "boy, you'd phony phonies and all phony as a bastard grumble grumble non sequitur ennui goddam phonies, for God's goddam sake"
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Zil on November 19, 2012, 05:38:52 PM
That's right!
Well, okay then. Here you go. (http://replays.gensokyou.org/download.php?id=25393) Finished with 500 extra motivation or something. A few weird deaths to fireballs because it didn't occur to me that you can't freeze-focus while freezing. Doubled my old high score at least.

And I think Lolita's probably a short enough book that you could sit down and read it in a day. It's not like you've run out of time yet!
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: pasu on November 19, 2012, 06:21:29 PM
For your penance, you must then attempt IN Normal, using Border Team, and upload the replay here.

;_;
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: nintendonut888 on November 19, 2012, 06:25:16 PM
Very well. Let me try this. A-HEM.

Quote
Your penance is to compose a 10-stanza kenning wherein Patch Adams tries to cheer up Gengetsu on her deathbed.

Illusion-moon.
Cheery-buffoon.

Syphilis-doom.
Deathbed-gloom.

Misplaced-fret.
Heaven-beget.

Makai-dwell.
Automatic-hell.

Happiness-time.
Remembrance-sublime.

Family-one.
Reputation-none.

Great-boss.
Societal-loss.

Apathy-great.
Former-PC-98.

Meme-praise.
Timeout-phase.

Double-obituary.
Demon/Apothecary.

*bow*
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 19, 2012, 09:17:27 PM
Oh crap. I didn't even realize I should doubt the narrator, I just sort of read along, accepting it all. Happens to be my worst subject. Uh, I request for few months of time to read this book, Salinger's book, get into reading books in general, research unreliable narrators, study and try to find inconsistencies within Perfect Memento in Strict Sense and Symposium of Post-Mysticism 'n' whatnot else.

JT is right about Holden's use of "phony". Should also know that Holden is supposed to be your typical sneering teenager who thinks everyone is full of shit and that he's better than all of them. There's a lot of wisdom in some of what he says, but for the most part it's wisdom he'd be better off applying to himself.

I require judgment for the following!

Seems to the Yama that the general message here can be boiled down to "be your own motherfucker". I would be inclined to agree.


Oh, nicely done! Congratulations, Beats! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.


The Yama has heard that even ZUN Himself has been amazed by people who do what you just did. Congratulations, Zil! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.


A noble effort. Congratulations, pasu! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.


See? The Yama knew you had it in you. Congratulations, Donut! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: theshirn on November 19, 2012, 11:06:37 PM
Seems to the Yama that the general message here can be boiled down to "be your own motherfucker". I would be inclined to agree.
Why does the Yama want us to have sex with our mothers?  I am dismayed and confused! D:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 20, 2012, 12:34:19 AM
Why does the Yama want us to have sex with our mothers?  I am dismayed and confused! D:

The Yama moves in mysterious ways. Moreover, the phrase posted seems to encourage people to maintain their individuality; though keeping the minds of the crowd in mind, in the end, you have to be true to yourself.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Shadoweh on November 20, 2012, 07:59:58 AM
Yama, I think I've sinned again. This Red Velvet ice cream definitely tastes like sin.
(I don't have a camera so you can't has a picture of it)
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Bio on November 20, 2012, 08:26:05 AM
I've been playing Assassin's Creed III?
Ahaha, yes?

Or maybe the  terrible pun is the sin.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AJS on November 20, 2012, 08:35:39 AM
I did a homework assignment, but forgot to submit it.  Shaaaaaaame....
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: draganuv15 on November 20, 2012, 09:46:51 AM
I am in Tenerife enjoying the warm sum while my school friends have to rot in Scotland study who knows what, I MUST ATONE!!!!

...

After I get back of course  :smug:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Bias Bus on November 20, 2012, 11:50:16 AM
I drank the last Dr. Pepper and didn't tell anyone.

Funny part? I don't even feel guilty about it.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 20, 2012, 12:18:04 PM
Yama, I think I've sinned again. This Red Velvet ice cream definitely tastes like sin.
(I don't have a camera so you can't has a picture of it)

SPOILERS: Red Velvet ice cream and cake is nothing more than chocolate flavor with red coloring. The Yama believes it a virtue to eat chocolate - consider it a point in your favor!

I've been playing Assassin's Creed III?
Ahaha, yes?

Or maybe the  terrible pun is the sin.

Oh dear. Horrible puns are among the worst sins of all. For your penance, you must select ten users and make puns of their names based on their posting styles.

I did a homework assignment, but forgot to submit it.  Shaaaaaaame....

The Yama, as you know, prefers good girls and boys to do their homework. Much like Santa. But this is a case of poor memory rather than failure to do your homework, so for your penance, you must devise a memory trick - some method that can help a person remember to bring everything they need before they leave the house.

I am in Tenerife enjoying the warm sum while my school friends have to rot in Scotland study who knows what, I MUST ATONE!!!!

...

After I get back of course  :smug:

The Yama considers bragposting a grievous sin. For your penance, you must list five things which Scotland does better than Tenerife.

I drank the last Dr. Pepper and didn't tell anyone.

Funny part? I don't even feel guilty about it.

You cheeky bastard!  The Yama happens to love Dr. Pepper and would indeed be peeved to discover someone had shameless drank the last one. For your penance, you must draw and post a picture of Shinki stocking your fridge with Dr. Peppers.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Werepuppy on November 20, 2012, 01:21:17 PM
When me and my Mum argue a bit, I often yell at my fiance (Kanjou) for no reason...

I don't mean to do so; but it just happens. What's worse is he hates being yelled at, and has told me off for it before. Yelling at Deities is bad; so forgive me.  :ohdear:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: draganuv15 on November 20, 2012, 03:20:37 PM
1. Scotland rains better.

2. More Clouds.

3. Colder in Scotland.

4. Pretty sure there's more game stores in Scotland.

5. We have Diet Coke instead of Coca Cola light which makes it sound healthier than Tenerife.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: LadyScarlet on November 20, 2012, 04:01:56 PM
Uh, Yama, no one is posting a math problem on this thread, so I will solve a random one:
21 + 71 = 92
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: NekoNekoRex on November 20, 2012, 05:10:56 PM
Yama, I have wracked my brain on trying to be funny but the only thing I can actually do with any decent skill is to be dramatic and speak in silly voices

However I have no ideas on how I can be original and funny with these two assets
Also I don't think I have any decent sound-recording equipment
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AJS on November 20, 2012, 05:35:53 PM
A memory trick!  Aha!  I can do this!  For you see, my sin was merely a momentary lapse in my memory abilities.  But I have found a good method to compensate for this in the past.

The trick is to anticipate what your future self will do, what it will forget, and compensate for that.  For instance, if you absolutely have to take a certain item with you tomorrow morning, pack it the night before and put it where you will see it before you leave, i.e. the front door, or the bathroom.  You can also leave notes for yourself, also in places you will pass before you leave.  Sticky notes are your friends! :3
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: NekoNekoRex on November 20, 2012, 10:16:49 PM
Uh, Yama, no one is posting a math problem on this thread, so I will solve a random one:
21 + 71 = 92
Here you go:

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs are to be seated in a straight line across the front of a stage. Assuming each is assigned a specific seat, how many different ways can they be seated so that nobody is in the correct seat?

About sins... I've been playing Touhou with an Xbox controller.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Raikaria on November 20, 2012, 10:33:03 PM
Yama, I felt a severe urge to start a religious war against the Church of England today when they failed to vote for female bishops.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 20, 2012, 10:51:13 PM
When me and my Mum argue a bit, I often yell at my fiance (Kanjou) for no reason...

I don't mean to do so; but it just happens. What's worse is he hates being yelled at, and has told me off for it before. Yelling at Deities is bad; so forgive me.  :ohdear:

Ah, this sin is very common, but fortunately easy to atone for. For your penance, make and share an "I'm sorry" card that you would make for your fiance. Could be things you draw/write yourself, a collage, a quote - anything at all, so long as it takes "card format".


Congratulations, Endless Hunger! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.


As NekoNekoRex dutifully points out, you were indeed given a math problem. And it appears to be slightly harder than basic addition - ganbare.

Yama, I have wracked my brain on trying to be funny but the only thing I can actually do with any decent skill is to be dramatic and speak in silly voices

However I have no ideas on how I can be original and funny with these two assets
Also I don't think I have any decent sound-recording equipment

Don't despair - the Yama believes in you. You can describe something that you saw in your everyday life that you thought was funny, i.e., "an anecdote."


Congratulations, AJS! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

Yama, I felt a severe urge to start a religious war against the Church of England today when they failed to vote for female bishops.

Oh does the Yama understand this well. However, rage is a sin, and must be atoned for - there's nothing wrong with being mad at authority, but being able to make your case sanely and clearly is key to a productive dialogue. For your penance, you must write a reasoned, level-headed and respectful letter of nonetheless firm objection to the patriarchy of the CoE.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Raikaria on November 20, 2012, 10:59:12 PM
Dear Archbishop of Canterbury, and other senior members of the Church of England:

While I am aware that the bishops voted 42 to 44 on the matter of female bishops, I strongly object to the fact that the motion was not passed, despite receiving a majority in all three houses. Why is it a matter which, by human rights shouldn't even need to be discussed, requires a super-majority three times over to be passed? The Church is supposed to be the guiding figure for moral issues, yet failing to allow women to advance to being bishops tarnishes this image, the Bible states that everyone is equal in the eyes of God, yet they are not equal in the Church. How can the Church comment on other moral wrongs while it is committing one against women? All that failing to pass the bill allowing female bishops does is further marginalize the already shrinking faith in the Church in Britian.

I strongly urge you to work as hard as you can to overturn this vote, and covnince the naysayers otherwise, for the future of the Church in the public's eyes.

Yours sincerely:
Raikaria [Some random dude on the Internet]
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Shadoweh on November 20, 2012, 11:49:10 PM
Hooray! More Red Velvet for m.. wait, coloring what? N-no! I-is this my penance?  ;-;
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Bio on November 20, 2012, 11:50:37 PM
You guys better start developing perculiar posting quirks so I can make fun of you.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: I have no name on November 20, 2012, 11:55:31 PM
I intended to do some speedruns like now but my PS2 is still packed up and I don't feel like unpacking it.  But if I don't start soon I won't have time to grind out a good run.  :ohdear:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: JT on November 21, 2012, 10:49:57 AM
Oh, here's a good one. This'll be my last one, I swear:

Back in 9th grade, I wrote an extraordinarily creepy, rambling love letter to a hot student art teacher I had at the time. It wasn't like "YO GIRL I JUST WANNA FORCIBLY JAM MY RAPEBONER IN YOU (PREFERABLY AT KNIFEPOINT)" or anything, but it was just like, really uncomfortably florid and chuuni as all get out. Like 80's power-ballad-level. It was that bad. I spent hours writing it. And then I actually fucking GAVE it to her. Why, you ask. Why would you do that. I have no idea, Yama-sama. I have no fucking clue. I didn't know then, either. In fact, I remember, I KNEW that nothing good would ever come of this fantastically stupid course of action. The whole time, I was fully aware of what a bald-faced invitation to disaster this letter was. I still felt absolutely determined to give it to her regardless, just for some reason that I wasn't able to understand. In retrospect, maybe that "disaster" is exactly what I wanted.

Either way, I succeeded in creeping the living fuck out of this woman, to the point where I had to have two separate Serious Discussions? with both my guidance counselor and the assistant principal, respectively. The latter included the asst. principal reading a few especially flowery lines aloud over the phone to my mom. Yeah. Imagine what that experience was like for me. Also, the art teacher was younger then than I am now, which feels really weird to me for some reason.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 21, 2012, 12:23:56 PM

Now this is what you call a proper letter. No one does "I am very angry in a polite, diplomatic way" quite like the British. Congratulations, Raikaria! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

I intended to do some speedruns like now but my PS2 is still packed up and I don't feel like unpacking it.  But if I don't start soon I won't have time to grind out a good run.  :ohdear:

More sloth, I see. The Yama is noticing a pattern on this board. Well, the penance here is obvious - unpack that PS2 and get crackin'. And don't forget to post your first speedrun here.


(http://i.imgur.com/sOl8z.jpg)

Even the Miko is embarrassed for you, JT. The Yama was embarrassed just reading it, and literally read most of this from behind both hands while muttering "Oh god oh god oh god". In fact there are as yet undiscovered tribes in the Amazon who are right now feeling a strong sense of embarrassment without knowing why.

But as far as the Yama can see, you have already served a penance for this by sharing this story alone, apart from the other details involving school staff. If you insist, though: for your penance, write the diary entry of said teacher on the day she received your letter.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: trancehime on November 21, 2012, 01:17:00 PM
forgive me judge

i'll be getting that drawing out by the end of the week, i hope. this week is just absolutely hellish for me right now.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: NekoNekoRex on November 21, 2012, 02:04:19 PM
Alright, get ready, it's goddamn story time. I've thought super hard about the funniest recent experience I've been in, and I intend to make at least somebody laugh.
 It's only taken a minor depression that this has caused me and an entire night staying awake, so hopefully it's worth it.


So, a few months ago, the day of the week finally decided it was a Friday, and Friday is the best day of the week.
Friday is very special to me for a few reasons. Firstly beacause it's the day of the week I get together with my best friends, almost without fail, to chill out at our local`hobby story, Epic Loot. On most weeks we get together, we play Dungeons and Dragons, 4th Edition. It's almost always a bloody great time.
But more importantly, Friday is the day I wear my cat ears out in public. I do this because I don't give a single fuck about public opinion, and because my friends totally understand my completely normal and healthy obsession with catgirls.

Anyways, the hour finally came in which we met up, and after the usual hour of goofing around and eating, we got around to playing the game.
Our group consists of (real names changed) Jimbo the Dramatic, the Dungeon Master, Bill the Quiet Party Leader, who plays Orohu the Werewolf Cleric, Sen the Actor, playing Xagmus the Drow Warlock, Mike the Strategist, predictably playing Ishmael the Human Wizard, Bob the Evil Guy, playing Drake the Gensai Psion (who is a total dick), Jack the Group Troll, playing Pride the Tiefling Rouge, Adam the Newbie, playing Axl the Dragonborn Fighter, and finally I, NekoRex the Loonie, playing Rancor the Dwarven Knight, aka The Dwarven Blur, the Beardiest Dwarf, who totally does NOT have a drinking problem blatant lies.

Together our party forms Team Can't Go Out In Public, probably the most fitting name for any adventuring party in the lands of fantasy.

Tonight our mission was to infiltrate a high-security fortress guarding the Ghost Redubber, housed in the center of the world's largest city of people who are basically the Protoss from Starcraft.

Naturally, at the hest of the TOTALLY NOT EVIL blatant lies Drake, we blew a huge hole in the roof with our Airship Cannons, thereby alerting the entire city we were here. We jumped in because we all have Rings of Feather Fall and were easily inside the compound. Thankfully we scouted the place before hand and knew where the vault was, so getting in was only a matter of killing the guards and busting the vault door down.

Behind the vault door we discovered that the actual vault was down an extremely long spiral staircase leading deep into the earth.

Being ballsy, I suggested we jump down to save time using our Rings of Feather Fall. The DM informed us that this was a bad idea, because in the center of the stairwell at the very bottom was a river of molten rock. Since I'm not an idiot, I figured that jumping down was therefore probably not the best choice of actions.

However, Pride, who apparently did not give a single fuck about magma because he had Fire Resistance, decided to jump down anyway.
As it turns out, fire resistance means jack shit in goddamn magma.

Cue an entire hour dedicated to laughing our asses off at this turn of events. Seriously, we used every single fire-related joke we could come up with. Jack could literally not stop laughing. Every time he came close to recovering from his gut-busting laughter someone pulled out another joke like singing "And he went down down down, into a burning ring of fire" or "burn baby burn, disco inferno", or other saying nonsense quotes ("Drop it like it's hot") or some other nonsense and he would just kill his sides into another bout of laughter. At some point I think I was actually rolling on the floor and laughing.

Anyway, after we wasted the entire hour laughing and eventually taking a break from laughing, then laughing again, we actually had to roll to see if Pride survive swimming around in liquid rock (he did, somehow), and then we got to the big fight of the night, which was against some very high level psionics who had bullshit charm powers, and a long row of security statues who fired bloody lasers. This fight proved too hard, so we stole the Ghost Redubber and got the hell out of there. And so ended the session.

We all packed up and left, and I decided to join my Jack for a round of late night videogaming at his house (which we do every week after the D&D meeting). We left in his car and went off home, and I asked him to stop by the library to drop some books off that I had.

This is where the night would continue it's hilarious adventure.

Coming out of the drop box lane, Jack turned down onto the left side of what he thought was a one-way road with a divider that fed into the main road.
Now, this had two major problems. First and most obviously, it wasn't actually a one-way road, which he was on the left side of. (Americans here will notice the problem here, it was the wrong side of the road). Secondly, and most importantly, a police car had just pulled out of the fenced in parking lot belonging to the police station next door. It was at this point we knew we were screwed. Sure enough, as soon as we pulled out onto the road, the cop flashed his lights, and we pulled in to the nearest driveway (which was for the municipal building across the road).

Now, we totally played it cool, but the unfortunate fact was that my friend was only on his Temps, and I have no drivers liscense to speak of. After being totally polite with the cop and compliant, we ended up having to call Jack's mom to pick us up since we couldn't drive, which she was not happy to do.
So for the next twenty minutes we waited for her to come, and we chatted with the cop, and stayed pretty cool. He ended up giving Jack a ticket (which he got off with a warning for and no fine), and his mom came. She apologized a whole bunch, and we all got out of that car to get into hers.

Marking the end of our exciting night, it was at this point Jack's mom informed me, much to my dismayed realization... I was still wearing my cat ears.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Cor on November 21, 2012, 02:26:57 PM
In fear of divine retribution I sat down and read the latter half of the book in one sitting. Instant motivation, just add water. Now, I'm tired as hell (Hah, where I'll probably go anyway. Hmm, I wonder if hell is a tiring place. Must be lazy, at least. Sloth is a deadly sin.), but I did reserve a copy of The Catcher in the Rye since the Yama recommended it 'n' whatnot. I might get around to writing about a Touhou character in the style of Holden Caulfield just for kicks anyway.

Hmm, let's see Mr Biohazurd make something of my posts. Hahaha. You poor soul, I've got no quirks.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: I have no name on November 21, 2012, 06:14:14 PM
More sloth, I see. The Yama is noticing a pattern on this board. Well, the penance here is obvious - unpack that PS2 and get crackin'. And don't forget to post your first speedrun here.
Well, I did some attempts last night.  But none of them could get past the 5th level, and only 2 got there, the rest failed on the first 2 -_-  I got really frustrated that I couldn't do the 'easy' parts to get to the 'hard' parts (which are actually luck-based).  I'll post again when I actually finish a run...
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Vento on November 21, 2012, 07:25:29 PM
eiki-sama! i'm done!!!!
i-its not like i rushed this o-or anything!!
(http://dl.dropbox.com/u/16868865/phone.png)
my assignment was to do a six view so you get 6 phones 8)
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: JT on November 21, 2012, 08:02:52 PM
(http://i.imgur.com/sOl8z.jpg)

Even the Miko is embarrassed for you, JT. The Yama was embarrassed just reading it, and literally read most of this from behind both hands while muttering "Oh god oh god oh god". In fact there are as yet undiscovered tribes in the Amazon who are right now feeling a strong sense of embarrassment without knowing why.

But as far as the Yama can see, you have already served a penance for this by sharing this story alone, apart from the other details involving school staff. If you insist, though: for your penance, write the diary entry of said teacher on the day she received your letter.

I don't blame you for feeling that way. It was hands-down the most harrowingly embarrassing thing I've ever lived through, and believe me, I'm not a bashful man. I did, after all, have the nigh-sociopathically reckless balls to give her this letter in the first place. (Or to, say, record myself serenading an anime character for the amusement of people on the internet.) I fully expected it to end badly, but not nearly as badly as it did.

It was long enough ago though that now I just laugh when I look back on it. It also taught me a useful lesson, which is that laying flowery theatrics on a strange woman will make her think you are a serial killer. From then on, I made it a personal policy to talk to any girl I was interested in quickly, decisively, and directly. The only time I ever deviated from this was when I pulled that stunt you might remember with Rite Aid Chick, which predictably exploded in the hangar.

Anyway, here's that penance:

Dear Diary,
 
        At last, my dream has come true. Today, I received a fawning, rambling, two-page love letter
from someone I barely know. I love him and this totally did not creep me out at all.
        Indeed, the singular object of my most deeply-held and intimate desires is none other than
this 14-year-old boy. I love his oily, greasy hair that covers his eyes, I love his scrawny, malnourished
body, I love his ratty Judas Priest T-shirt and fingerless gloves. I love the way he and his friends
communicate entirely by yelling Shaun of the Dead quotes at each other. JT, my beloved, the sound
of your name alone makes my sphincter tighten like a Falcon Punch fist.
         Oh, how I long to feel those unwashed, boogery hands fumble haphazardly at my ladyparts
like a Muppet playing the piano. To know the sweet, sensual caress of that wispy dirtlip as it gently
grazes my flesh. I imagine him in the throes of sweaty fuck-fury, his irises lit like burning coals as
tepid waves of moist Dorito breath billow over my unbreathing nostrils. Even now, the mere thought
of it makes my taco thick with hot love-sludge. As I write these very words, my heart pounds at my
sternum like a mandrill trapped in a Rubbermaid plastic storage tub.
       Alas, our love can never be, for JT is a student, and I am a student teacher. For the sake of his
reputation and his future as a man, I must pretend I don't like him. I must also tell, like, the entire
fucking staff about this, without making any attempt whatsoever to confront him myself, and will
henceforth avoid him as if he were fucking Pyramid Head or something. You know, just to be safe.
        A single tear rolls down my cheek. One day, perhaps, we will be together again, in another life.
Fate is so unkind.

- E.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: theshirn on November 21, 2012, 10:04:53 PM
that stunt you might remember with Rite Aid Chick
Oh come on, that was hilarious.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: I have no name on November 22, 2012, 12:38:58 AM
More sloth, I see. The Yama is noticing a pattern on this board. Well, the penance here is obvious - unpack that PS2 and get crackin'. And don't forget to post your first speedrun here.
So I don't have a recording, but have the image of my splits  :getdown:
[attach=1]
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: DNAbc on November 22, 2012, 02:21:11 PM
I sometimes question the reliability of the Yama, is that a sin?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: fondue on November 22, 2012, 02:36:56 PM
Ah, Enma-sama, thy work of redrawing thy scene from Lucky Star failed miserably. Ye should've not punished me because thy has drawn, even though thy drawing is unexpectedly lame.
[attach=1]
Please, release thy from hell's pits and lift thy up to the glorious times.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 22, 2012, 03:54:54 PM
forgive me judge

i'll be getting that drawing out by the end of the week, i hope. this week is just absolutely hellish for me right now.

No worries! The Yama can wait.


You see? Comedy is hard, but it's not impossible. Congratulations, NekoNekoRex! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.


Awesome, the Yama looks forward to it.


This was both hilarious and displayed considerable humility and self-deprecation. Congratulations, JT! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.


That works. Congratulations, ihavenoname! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

I sometimes question the reliability of the Yama, is that a sin?

It is indeed - the sin of pride. So you think you could do this? Well, we'll see about that. I present you with the following case; for your penance, you must pass judgement, offering sound reasons for your verdict:

An elderly man and his five-year-old grandson walk into a convenience store to buy some ice cream. Just as they get to the counter, a robber comes in, armed with a gun. He menaces the cashier, the old man, and the young boy, telling them to surrender their money or be shot. Unbeknownst to the robber, though, the old man is carry a handgun. It is legally registered and he has a license to carry a concealed weapon. The old man, rather than giving his money, draws his weapon on the robber and fires, killing him instantly. When the old man appears before you, he contends that he did not want to take any chances that the robber would simply take the money and leave without killing them all, and as such, was acting in self-defense.

What say you, Substitute-Yama? Was it self-defense? Or a rash decision? You be the judge.

Ah, Enma-sama, thy work of redrawing thy scene from Lucky Star failed miserably. Ye should've not punished me because thy has drawn, even though thy drawing is unexpectedly lame.
[attach=1]
Please, release thy from hell's pits and lift thy up to the glorious times.

Hey, that's not half bad, kiddo! Congratulations, fonduemaster. You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: theshirn on November 22, 2012, 04:44:21 PM
Ah, Enma-sama, thy work of redrawing thy scene from Lucky Star failed miserably. Ye should've not punished me because thy has drawn, even though thy drawing is unexpectedly lame.
[attach=1]
Please, release thy from hell's pits and lift thy up to the glorious times.
"thy" means "your" you doofus
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: fondue on November 22, 2012, 04:59:51 PM
"thy" means "your" you doofus
I thought 'thy' meant 'me' and 'the' universally.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Cookiejesus on November 22, 2012, 06:05:30 PM
Forgive me for I have sinned.

I savescummed in the second gym of my Pokemon Emerald Nuzlocke Challenge, because I didn't want to lose my starter that early.

Also, I lurk way too much...

E: Fixed a spelling error
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Delfigamer on November 22, 2012, 06:57:01 PM
It was hard to find a sin in my karma. I all do right. I hate Sanae, love Toyo-waifu (http://fotki.yandex.ru/users/delfigamer/album/193430/), worhip Yukari (http://fotki.yandex.ru/users/delfigamer/album/185696/)...
Oh, I don't like Byakuren. That's the worst thing I've done; and I'm not sure that even this is bad enough to ask Shiki for a help. However, judge is she. What she says?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Cor on November 22, 2012, 07:13:01 PM
Oh, I don't like Byakuren.
Well, you can be happy you can only go up from there.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: JT on November 22, 2012, 07:45:07 PM
An elderly man and his five-year-old grandson walk into a convenience store to buy some ice cream. Just as they get to the counter, a robber comes in, armed with a gun. He menaces the cashier, the old man, and the young boy, telling them to surrender their money or be shot. Unbeknownst to the robber, though, the old man is carry a handgun. It is legally registered and he has a license to carry a concealed weapon. The old man, rather than giving his money, draws his weapon on the robber and fires, killing him instantly. When the old man appears before you, he contends that he did not want to take any chances that the robber would simply take the money and leave without killing them all, and as such, was acting in self-defense.
Couldn't resist throwing my two cents in on this one. (Darkninjaabc, don't read this unless you're a dirty cheater.)

Reagarding the self-defense angle, my gut instinct there is to say that anyone who points a deadly weapon at you is fair game. This is more complex than that, though. First, let's say right away: If they had just handed over the money, odds are very good that nobody would have been killed. Petty convenience store robbers don't run around wantonly murdering people. Drawing your own weapon, however, is an invitation to make the guy panic and start shooting. Let's also remember that this is someone's grandpa we're talking about here, not The Punisher. He's old, likely lacking proper training, and undoubtedly shitting his pants with fear--this is not someone with a steady hand. Even if the robber is standing six feet away from him, it's incredibly naive to assume all of his shots will land on target. A ricochet or misaimed shot could easily hit an innocent bystander such as his grandson. Looking at it realistically, the old man's actions greatly exacerbated the danger of the situation. If I were the kid's father, I'd be furious. I would probably demand that he quit carrying a fucking gun around if he ever wanted to see my son again, because he clearly has no comprehension of how dangerous it is. TO HELL WITH HIM!
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: NekoNekoRex on November 23, 2012, 12:04:46 AM
Response to the above spoilered post. Don't read if you're Darkninja
Couldn't it be just as likely the old man is an army veteran or otherwise has quite a lot of training with weaponry? Most people don't carry guns around for show, and I expect having a conceal license would require you have at least some knowledge on how to properly use it. Not all old men are vulnerable and easily scared. Questioning the mettle of the grandpa is WIFOM in this situation because it's not clear how much experience he has firing his weapon at other people.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Vento on November 23, 2012, 12:29:04 AM
dear yama you seem to have missed my penance post ;-;
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Error on November 23, 2012, 03:59:20 AM
I was walking a dog, and said dog dropped a steamer right in front of a "do not poop" sign.
I know it's wrong, but I don't feel bad. I didn't try to stop the dog either. I just stood there and laughed...

As for this whole Yama-for-a-case thing:
I would rule it as self-defense. He didn't know if the robber was going to use it or not. There really isn't time to think rationally when someone is waving a gun around and making threats, even if it's for the sole purpose of coercion.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: JT on November 23, 2012, 09:31:01 AM
He could be fucking Solid Snake for all we know, but it's far more likely that he isn't. Would you bet the life of a loved one on the odds that some random old man is a seasoned combat veteran? How "vulnerable" he is is largely irrelevant anyway. It doesn't matter who you are or how many times you've been shot at--if you're looking down the barrel of a loaded weapon, you WILL be afraid, and you WILL have a shaky hand. Take it from someone who's actually had a gun pointed at them before.

Requirements for getting a concealed carry permit aren't that stringent in most jurisdictions that have them. (There are a few places in the US that don't even require a permit at all, but Ammy did say the old man was licensed, so I guess we can assume this isn't one of them.) Usually it's stuff like passing a computerized background check and/or taking a class on firearm safety. There are some places that make you take a practical exam as well, but that's within the controlled and safe environment of a range. It isn't combat training. Shooting at a target isn't the same as shooting at an armed human being.

You should never fire a gun in the presence of bystanders unless the person you're shooting at has a clear intent to kill. Period. Had the old man accidentally killed the cashier or his grandson, he would be thrown in jail for manslaughter. Fortunately he didn't, so in this case, yeah, his actions would probably be ruled in a court of law as self-defense. That doesn't change the fact that what he did was incredibly reckless and stupid.

Edit: Great example relevant to this debate -- Remember the shooting that took place at the Empire State Building back in August? The perpetrator shot one guy, while the cops - note that these are professionally trained officers of the law we're talking about - hit him plus nine bystanders. If you look at the surveillance video, you'll even see that they were practically standing on his toes when it happened. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6W8cHwNuqH4) He couldn't have been more than 10 feet away from them, and their shots hit NINE other people.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: BT on November 23, 2012, 12:24:54 PM
I don't see the relevance of the old man's experience with guns. Unless the robber is mentally unstable (information which is not given to us), the old man and his grandson weren't in danger. So, it wasn't self-defense to begin with.

I'm having doubts that most courts would rule this as self-defense.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: NekoNekoRex on November 23, 2012, 12:37:40 PM
Having a gun pointed at you qualifies in court as Assault With A Deadly Weapon, whether it's being fired or not
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on November 23, 2012, 03:33:34 PM
Now that I have absolved myself (I think) of my first sin, I will ask again:

Tengu-yama, I'm not honest with myself.

I complain about so much of Touhou fandom being obsessed with memes and cheap humor, and then I go and do things like Byakuren reacting to a double rainbow, Mokou out-swagging Kaguya, and increasingly ridiculous theories about Sakuya's origins.

How can I find my personal compass on this matter?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: DNAbc on November 24, 2012, 12:18:22 PM
It is indeed - the sin of pride. So you think you could do this? Well, we'll see about that. I present you with the following case; for your penance, you must pass judgement, offering sound reasons for your verdict:

An elderly man and his five-year-old grandson walk into a convenience store to buy some ice cream. Just as they get to the counter, a robber comes in, armed with a gun. He menaces the cashier, the old man, and the young boy, telling them to surrender their money or be shot. Unbeknownst to the robber, though, the old man is carry a handgun. It is legally registered and he has a license to carry a concealed weapon. The old man, rather than giving his money, draws his weapon on the robber and fires, killing him instantly. When the old man appears before you, he contends that he did not want to take any chances that the robber would simply take the money and leave without killing them all, and as such, was acting in self-defense.

What say you, Substitute-Yama? Was it self-defense? Or a rash decision? You be the judge.

(Sorry for being so late with my penance, Yama-sama, I had things to take care of before I pass on to another world. Do forgive your puny subject for his incompetence. \(_ _)/ )

The motive of the elderly man is no doubt in self-defense, and he's right to think so, the old man at that time is being held hostage by a gunner, with the life of his grandson and another innocent stranger at stake. Even though he should be trained for proper usage of arms. He's still a human, and he should be afraid and is probably in a panic then, it is understandable why he shot the robber in order to protect his child.

HOWEVER, this is still fundamentally wrong. Let's think about the scenario once again; This is a robber robbing a freaking convenience store, this sort of thing happen all the time around the globe, and really, there are less people who are actually killed these sort of robber than people who are stabbed to death by a narwhal, being in a panic or trying to protect something isn't an excuse for killing someone, the motive is definitely understandable, but the decision is undoubtedly rash and inhumane. Therefore, my verdict is;


IT WAS A RASH DECISION IN SELF-DEFENSE


Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 24, 2012, 03:01:36 PM
Forgive me for I have sinned.

I savescummed in the second gym of my Pokemon Emerald Nuzlocke Challenge, because I didn't want to lose my starter that early.

Also, I lurk way to much...

Ah, the question that goes back to the ancients - is savescumming cheating? The Yama admits she savescums before any attempt to hack terminals in Fallout 3 because come on - how can you not? If devs didn't want you to savescum, they wouldn't let you - they would only allow for autosaves at specific points. This is therefore not a sin and you are pre-emptively absolved.

It was hard to find a sin in my karma. I all do right. I hate Sanae, love Toyo-waifu (http://fotki.yandex.ru/users/delfigamer/album/193430/), worhip Yukari (http://fotki.yandex.ru/users/delfigamer/album/185696/)...
Oh, I don't like Byakuren. That's the worst thing I've done; and I'm not sure that even this is bad enough to ask Shiki for a help. However, judge is she. What she says?

Disliking Byakuren is a far, far less egregious sin than waifuism, not to mention aimed towards such a bland, one-dimensional Mary Sue as either Watatsuki sister, not to mention aimed towards Toyohime, who manages to achieve the nigh-impossible task of having less personality than her sister. For your penance, you must present a convincing argument for Toyohime - what makes her more interesting than Byakuren, specifically.

dear yama you seem to have missed my penance post ;-;

I didn't see a candlestick phone in that drawing there, but it's pretty impressive all the same. Congratulations, venappo! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

Now that I have absolved myself (I think)

Did you? The penance you were given (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,13767.msg911862.html#msg911862) to "draw a picture of Matt Dillon in Boondock Saints eating a hot dog as he is about to be hit by a bus."? The Yama would love to see that, but looking through the thread, it does not appear to be posted. Perhaps I missed it?


You have provided a judgement based on well-thought-out reasons, one which the Yama happens to agree with. For comparison purposes, you might want to read up on the story of Bernhard Goetz (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bernhard_Goetz) who, while using an illegal firearm, was also charged with attempted murder for shooting and seriously wounding four supposed muggers on a New York subway. Bernhard was white, his attackers were black. Guess how the jury ruled.

Anyways, congratulations, Darkninjaabc! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Delfigamer on November 24, 2012, 03:31:51 PM
Disliking Byakuren is a far, far less egregious sin than waifuism, not to mention aimed towards such a bland, one-dimensional Mary Sue as either Watatsuki sister, not to mention aimed towards Toyohime, who manages to achieve the nigh-impossible task of having less personality than her sister. For your penance, you must present a convincing argument for Toyohime - what makes her more interesting than Byakuren, specifically.
You mean Toyosatomimi, I guess. (http://img-fotki.yandex.ru/get/6501/110955323.5/0_a186c_8a81a806_orig)
- Toyo is cool.
- Toyo is a cool DJ. :3
- Toyo was born cool - she can understand many people's speeches from her birth.
- Her wings seen during TD battle are the best last-boss effect ever. And yeah, they're cool.
- Toyo was teached by Seiga. Yeeeah, Byaku hadn't such a cool master.
- She is Taoist. Taoists are cool. Because Toyo is one of them.
- She isn't a hippi teaching youkais to throw themselves away. Youkai's core is its personality, and personality of most youkai is fear.
Is that enough?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Aba Matindesu! on November 24, 2012, 03:45:22 PM
You mean Toyosatomimi, I guess. (http://img-fotki.yandex.ru/get/6501/110955323.5/0_a186c_8a81a806_orig)
- Toyo is cool.
- Toyo is a cool DJ. :3
- Toyo was born cool - she can understand many people's speeches from her birth.
- Her wings seen during TD battle are the best last-boss effect ever. And yeah, they're cool.
- Toyo was teached by Seiga. Yeeeah, Byaku hadn't such a cool master.
- She is Taoist. Taoists are cool. Because Toyo is one of them.
- She isn't a hippi teaching youkais to throw themselves away. Youkai's core is its personality, and personality of most youkai is fear.
Is that enough?
http://en.touhouwiki.net/wiki/Watatsuki_no_Toyohime
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 24, 2012, 03:49:38 PM

Oh dear, looks like the Yama done fucked up majorly. You even provided a link to pictures of said Taoist prince(ss).

She is pretty awesome, therefore your only sin is waifuism. For your penance, you must watch this educational video (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_YtwPPsBKGQ), and share your thoughts afterwards.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Cookiejesus on November 24, 2012, 05:52:25 PM
Ah, the question that goes back to the ancients - is savescumming cheating? The Yama admits she savescums before any attempt to hack terminals in Fallout 3 because come on - how can you not? If devs didn't want you to savescum, they wouldn't let you - they would only allow for autosaves at specific points. This is therefore not a sin and you are pre-emptively absolved.

Well, I would have never considered to look at it from this angle.

I thank the Yama for her judgement.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Cor on November 24, 2012, 06:35:47 PM
Thanks for the link, Yama. Is being at least 100% gay for JT's voice a sin? I sure hope it isn't.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: NekoNekoRex on November 24, 2012, 07:05:31 PM
Yama I watched JT's video because I find JT funny, but then I got to the part about how JT talks about smug bastards who hold themselves higher then "normal people who use Facebook and go to parties" and also dislike "Narutards and other nerds who like popular anime" and now I feel bad because I am one of those people

how do I repent for my vapid elitism

EDIT: Also my best friend is a narutard and I constantly shit on him for it
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on November 24, 2012, 09:37:35 PM
Did you? The penance you were given (http://www.shrinemaiden.org/forum/index.php/topic,13767.msg911862.html#msg911862) to "draw a picture of Matt Dillon in Boondock Saints eating a hot dog as he is about to be hit by a bus."? The Yama would love to see that, but looking through the thread, it does not appear to be posted. Perhaps I missed it?

Oh, ack, no, I just forgot. I knew I forgot something, but I forgot WHAT, and I didn't control-F enough apparently.

Also:

Disliking Byakuren is a far, far less egregious sin than waifuism, not to mention aimed towards such a bland, one-dimensional Mary Sue as either Watatsuki sister

NOT COOL, TENGUYAMA. NOT COOL AT ALL. ;_;
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: fondue on November 24, 2012, 09:56:21 PM
Disliking Byakuren is a far, far less egregious sin than waifuism, not to mention aimed towards such a bland, one-dimensional Mary Sue as either Watatsuki sister
Okay, THAT is a sin. You need to punish yourself.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: MatsuriSakuragi on November 24, 2012, 11:24:53 PM
Disliking Byakuren is a far, far less egregious sin than waifuism, not to mention aimed towards such a bland, one-dimensional Mary Sue as either Watatsuki sister

I'm judging you now. :colbert:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: fondue on November 24, 2012, 11:27:57 PM
I am a fan of Lady Gaga, Nicki Minaj and Justin Beiber.
Are they even sins? :<
Is being at least 100% gay for JT's voice a sin? I sure hope it isn't.
I leik JT's voice too c:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 24, 2012, 11:30:28 PM



Hm, that's odd. The Yama sees a lot of complaints about her opinion of the Watas, and yet not a single cogent counterpoint.

Just for fun, let's have a group penance: the three of you must present a clear argument for the following, citing canonical sources:

1. Why the Watatsukis are actually not Mary Sues, but have relatable flaws and imperfections, and
2. Why Toyo in particular actually has a personality beyond "boy do I love peaches".

I am a fan of Lady Gaga, Nicki Minaj and Justin Beiber.
Are they even sins? :<

Nope, these are all talented people in their own particular way.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: JT on November 25, 2012, 01:10:50 AM
>Nicki Minaj
>talented

(http://oi49.tinypic.com/20u8z1i.gif)

I will give you Lady Gaga and Justin Bieber, though. There are two (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HI4kwzPsi0I) Lady Gaga songs I actually really like. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pUxclYKNjiU) (They're remixes, but whatever.) She was also was in one of my favorite things ever (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pi7gwX7rjOw), so there is that. As for Bieber, you won't catch me blasting BABY BABY BABY OHHHH out my car windows anytime soon, but supposedly he's like, a supertalented multi-instrumentalist, and he can actually sing. I think he's just an easy target for ridicule because of how popular and goody-goody he is.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: NekoNekoRex on November 25, 2012, 04:04:24 AM
Yama skipped my post =/
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on November 25, 2012, 04:25:50 AM
I will gladly answer your summons, Tenguyama, if only because I think I'm one of the few who actually wants more info rather than less about the Moon sisters, but first I will comply with your previous request.

I have never seen Boondock Saints, I don't know who Matt Dillon is, and he doesn't even seem to have been in Boondock Saints, but I have fulfilled your request to the best of my abilities and even put.............JELLY ON THIS HOT GOD.

(http://i.imgur.com/SeE72.png)
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 25, 2012, 04:35:29 AM

Passable, as it has all the elements asked for. Congratulations, silly name! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.


Elitism is a pretty common offense, and fortunately, there is a cure. For your penance, you must write a brief play about a figma-buying anime elitist who attends a party being hosted by three typical Axe-doused bros, and actually has a good time.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on November 25, 2012, 04:43:48 AM
Passable, as it has all the elements asked for. Congratulations, silly name! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

HOORAY!

Moonsister essay coming once I've made a dent in my homework.

In the meantime:

-Tenguyama, how do I reconcile my complaining that too much of Touhou fanon is based off of memes and cheap humor when I myself do things like make a create.swf comic about Byakuren freaking out about a rainbow?

-Tenguyama, I learned today that amongst the merch related to the recent Evangelion remakes is a dubstep version of Komm Susser Todd. I've always found Gainax's merchandising amusingly tacky before, but this just makes me want to HURT PEOPLE. Is my anger at Gainax here for not only cashing in on a shitty trend but signal-repeating a lackluster genre of music justified?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Conqueror on November 25, 2012, 08:15:05 AM
What a strange sin to confess. So be it - your penance is to draw the Punisher and the Yama having a picnic.
(http://puu.sh/1u47e)
I apologize for my shoddy art skills, but I have produced here the Yama and the Punisher having a pleasant picnic of fried chicken and watermelon while soaring on a picnic blanket above the tortured burning souls of hell. Is this satisfactory? If not, I request additional punishment.  :*
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: trancehime on November 25, 2012, 08:24:41 AM
Dear judge, I present to you my penance (http://i.imgur.com/vtAOw.jpg). (<-- yes this is the link to the image, apparently people got confused)

I was drawing this while listening to the first Ending theme of Sword Art Online, ユメセカイ (Yume Sekai).

♪遠くに聞こえた鐘の音が少し寂しくて
もう一度強く今度は高く駆け抜けた♪

Sometimes, I'll get lonely... But when I see my friends, and spend time with them, eventually, I'll find the strength to pick myself up again and keep on going... If I don't do it for myself, I'll be doing it for everyone who believes in me...

♪ただ繰り返す現実も星の数の願い事も
目指すべき明日を見つけた この想いには勝てない♪

I have dreams and aspirations too, just like any other other person, I suppose. They may not be as ambitious, but it seems that at times, when I think I'm well on my way, taking each "tomorrow" into stride, something happens, and I wonder, "will I make it?"

♪目の前に開かれた果てない世界 たとえ仮想(ゆめ)でもいい
迷い続けても胸の奥で強くずっとずっと響いてく♪

At the same time, though, I'll imagine a world... much better than the one we live in now. Hell, I'll even envision a future where my life doesn't seem to suck every time. As I continue on, lost, knowing that there are people out there who believe in me, people close to me who will support me... it makes my beat go on, even if I seem to be at the lowest points, like now. I'll realize that sometimes, I've just got to take the blows and come back again... You know, it's like that one quote of Rocky's in Rocky Balboa.

♪幼いリボンを捨てた夜から見た夢は
輝いた街で理想の日々を送ってた♪

Each day, I'll think about these things... No matter how much I want to think it, I've learned too much to really consider myself a true "child." But I'll see all the awesome people I've met and become friends with... And they'll help me try to understand why life's the way it is, and they do try to guide me on looking at things in a better perspective. Even if I deny it, and try to shove those away... They don't stop trying. They know they can get through to me eventually.

♪傷つかない場所目指して翼ばかり求めだけど
この背中にただ1つの守るものがあればいい♪

It's because... even if I deny it... Secretly, I just want someone to take me away, to save me...
Someone who's there, who's got my back, to help me when I need it most... And I mean, in person.

♪少しずつ鮮やかに彩る世界感じたままでいい
微笑みの色も巡り逢うの色ももっともっと変わってく♪

I just want some more color in my life, the colors I see in my life, they change, you know... While they do provide the happiness I've had before, change is inevitable... Like what I am experiencing now, these colors are shades of black, of grey. Nothing like the colorful, vivid shades of nature that I saw even a couple of months ago... I want to experience that happiness again.

♪答えが無くて 目指そうとして
綺麗じゃなくて 諦めなくて
私もきっとこの世界と似てる信じ続けてる♪

But you know, there are no magic answers to this problem... Everyone's told me that... And I've had to accept it.
Not everything's all fun and games... yet, I can't falter, even if I want to. I've got to keep believing that this world has some beauty to it.
That's part of the reason why I made my tumblr. I wanted to find things that could change my negative outlook on life.

♪新しい涙で見えて来た未来怖がらなくていい
心の傷みと探してた景色はきっときっと重なる♪

I guess a lot of my depressive spell (of failure and sadness, naturally) came from my fear of the future. This is the first time I've ever experienced true failure.
I became fearful, and because this was my first time to experience something like this, I was caught in a hole, the pains in my heart and mind were great.
Looking for the light at the end of the tunnel took its toll.

♪限りなく
目の前に開かれた果てない世界 
たとえ仮想(ゆめ)でもいい
迷い続けても胸の奥で強く
ずっとずっと響いてく

ずっとずっと響いてる・・・

そっとそっと光ってる・・・♪

But that's gotta come to an end eventually, you know...
Even if it's hard... So many people are supporting me.
A lot of people want me just to... keep myself safe.
I can't blame them.
No matter how hard it is, I have to keep trucking...

You know, that was pretty long.

I guess the point is, there's no specific time in my life where I could call myself "happy," it's more of a progressive thing. It's a mood. The picture I drew... I really had one person in mind when I drew that, someone I deeply care for. But at the same time, it also captures a lot of the love I have for my friends. All my friends, they're awesome, both online and in real life. In fact, as I was doing this, I was struggling to stop myself from crying. By the time I had finished it, I was bawling my eyes out. And I can't stop. It's a lot of emotion that I put into this, even if it seems really roughly done...

But I suppose I'm being a bit on a soap box. But this is a confessional, after all, right? Consider this one of my bigger confessionals.



Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Delfigamer on November 25, 2012, 08:59:58 AM
She is pretty awesome, therefore your only sin is waifuism. For your penance, you must watch this educational video (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_YtwPPsBKGQ), and share your thoughts afterwards.
Well, my English is not good enough for full understanding of videos, films and such; but, I think, I've got the point of this video. It says that waifuists are asocial dicks with mind filled with somewhat religious shit like "maiwaifu is best (http://lurkmore.so/images/5/5d/Otaku-dakimakuras.jpg) 3d reality sucks (http://images.wikia.com/steinsgate/de/images/5/5a/Daru.jpg)" etc.
I doubt that a youtube educational video can rescue those poor guys. Though it may can, like a one anti-alcoholic ad (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SSdyrwIObNE).
Well, about me. I cannot be really addicted by an imaginary world (one of sysyoukai effects), they occupy a special place in my mind and rarely intersect with the real world. So, I'm not going to do any ritual (http://lurkmore.so/images/4/4a/Mai_Waifu_2.jpg); I even have no posters in my room. I normally interact with girls, even attracted by one.
So, it's likely that "Toyo-waifu" is just a fond calling for Miko, not calling for real waifu - Toyo is actually my most loved character, but I'm fully aware that she is just a character.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Ran-Rii on November 27, 2012, 05:45:31 AM
I am crazy about Patchouli, and believe that she can curbstomp Byakuren should her asthma be cured.

Is that a sin?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Mootsies on November 27, 2012, 12:37:01 PM
I hereby convey my sin to the great Tenguyama.
I've been abandoning this forum for a little while. What should I do?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: ActionDan on November 27, 2012, 05:13:39 PM
It seems that long ago, I commited grevious sin. 

For I regularly choose Eiki-sama as my hero of choice while playing DOTS.

I'll never really know what first induced me to pick her out of the many other lolis, but I can tell you one thing:

She's OP and makes all the enemy QQ.

And I like it.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Pesco on November 27, 2012, 05:23:17 PM
It seems that long ago, I commited grevious sin. 

That would be starting the chess games thread that you never bothered to finish actually.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: I have no name on November 27, 2012, 06:32:35 PM
her asthma
Why does everyone say this >_>

When Marisa defeats her in EoSD, Patchouli says, and I quote, "sob, I'm so anemic I can't finish reciting the spells."
I'm not sure about her fighting game dialogue, or the books, but from what I do know Patchy is anemic not asthmatic.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: marukyuu on November 27, 2012, 07:12:01 PM
Why does everyone say this >_>

When Marisa defeats her in EoSD, Patchouli says, and I quote, "sob, I'm so anemic I can't finish reciting the spells."
I'm not sure about her fighting game dialogue, or the books, but from what I do know Patchy is anemic not asthmatic.
She is both. She actually tells Reimu her asthma "isn't so bad" in her Extra Stage appearance.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on November 27, 2012, 08:55:23 PM
Oi, people, we're splitting hairs---the point is that physically she's fragile but makes up for it with magic and a keen scholastic mind.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: fondue on November 27, 2012, 10:04:02 PM
Enough of the mukyuu talk and lets get back to sinning!
I threatened to cut someone's face off at school. Then when the teacher A.K.A the big whore tried to report me to someone higher up I called her a bombaclat (Jamacian Patois language, go figure) but she didn't hear me.
And I accidentailly came across some naughty stuff on the internet and didn't close the page :c
fap
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 27, 2012, 10:15:08 PM
-how do I reconcile my complaining that too much of Touhou fanon is based off of memes and cheap humor when I myself do things like make a create.swf comic about Byakuren freaking out about a rainbow?
-I learned today that amongst the merch related to the recent Evangelion remakes is a dubstep version of Komm Susser Todd. I've always found Gainax's merchandising amusingly tacky before, but this just makes me want to HURT PEOPLE. Is my anger at Gainax here for not only cashing in on a shitty trend but signal-repeating a lackluster genre of music justified?
-For your penance, make a create.swf comic that uses at least 21 Touhou memes within four  panels.
-Yes.


This is hilarious. Congratulations, Conqueror! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

Dear judge, I present to you my penance (http://i.imgur.com/vtAOw.jpg). (<-- yes this is the link to the image, apparently people got confused)

Oh this pleases the Yama. Congratulations, trance! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.


This is a pretty articulate and multi-facted confession. There seems to be a lot of cause-and-effect here, vicious circles. But you have a very solid sense of gratitude, and maybe that's giving you the strength to keep going. There's a lot of different solutions to chronic unhappiness; I guess all I can provide by way of reassurance is just to say that I know you'll find yours, and the many people around you who care about you believe you will, too. You are therefore pre-emptively absolved. Congratulations, again trance! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.


Rest assured the Yama believes you have a good enough grasp of English to have fully understood its message. Congratulations, Delfigamer! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

I am crazy about Patchouli, and believe that she can curbstomp Byakuren should her asthma be cured.

Is that a sin?

Patchouli's anemia and asthma (and probably consumption, whatever the hell that was, the Yama supposes) notwithstanding, an extra midboss against a final bo- hah, I mean, that'd be quite a one-sided match up. Speaking of one-sided attacks, you've probably been seeing the news about a particularly horrific massacre going on right now, every day. One that goes back for centuries, and is unlikely to ever reach a viable, non-violent conclusion. The Yama is referring of course to this (http://www.wildlifeextra.com/go/news/feral-cat-US.html#cr). For your penance, you must depict - in poem, story, song or drawing - ten cats killing 480 million birds.


The Yama agrees with Pesco. I've never seen the chess thread, but abandoning one does sound like a sin. For your penance, you must start a Fischer Random (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chess960) chess thread.

I threatened to cut someone's face off at school. Then when the teacher A.K.A the big whore tried to report me to someone higher up I called her a bombaclat (Jamacian Patois language, go figure) but she didn't hear me.

The Yama has no idea what happened here, but it sounds like a sin. For your penance, you should change your avatar to one of the cast of Dynasty (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0081856/fullcredits#cast) for the next ten days.

Also TMI.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: fondue on November 27, 2012, 10:22:00 PM
Yeah... TMI
I will have to do it tommorow because I'm on my phone right now, and also I want to save the Zangoose avatar before so.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: HakureiSM on November 27, 2012, 10:23:50 PM
Someone's been playing too much GTAIV
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: fondue on November 27, 2012, 10:27:58 PM
Someone's been playing too much GTAIV
nope. Laptop-tan sucks too much to run that
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Ran-Rii on November 27, 2012, 11:20:53 PM
Patchouli's anemia and asthma (and probably consumption, whatever the hell that was, the Yama supposes) notwithstanding, an extra midboss against a final bo- hah, I mean, that'd be quite a one-sided match up. Speaking of one-sided attacks, you've probably been seeing the news about a particularly horrific massacre going on right now, every day. One that goes back for centuries, and is unlikely to ever reach a viable, non-violent conclusion. The Yama is referring of course to this (http://www.wildlifeextra.com/go/news/feral-cat-US.html#cr). For your penance, you must depict - in poem, story, song or drawing - ten cats killing 480 million birds.


Yes, ma'am! 10 cats to 480 million birds.... aww bloody hell, this is going to be hard to get out...
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Hinacle on November 28, 2012, 02:01:30 AM
I tend to judge people based on first impressions and never bother to get to know them if my first impression of them was bad.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Viola on November 28, 2012, 02:43:09 AM
I would rather (and gladly) follow Crown Prince Toyosatomimi no Miko, over being in the mere company of Byakuren Hijiri. How could I possibly repent for this atrocious sin?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: The Hating Hater on November 28, 2012, 03:33:41 AM
I can't seem to get into Gintama, no matter how much I try.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: HakureiSM on November 28, 2012, 04:45:12 AM
I can't fucking go to bed on time
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: theshirn on November 28, 2012, 04:50:57 AM
I had the chance to steal my roommate's copy of Cold Night and didn't. :ohdear:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: helvetica on November 30, 2012, 05:45:31 AM
I like to post in locked threads and laugh at people who can't
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: fondue on November 30, 2012, 04:36:53 PM
Did you just unlock the thread?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 30, 2012, 04:55:36 PM
I tend to judge people based on first impressions and never bother to get to know them if my first impression of them was bad.

Oh dear, the sin of prejudice! That is a doozy. For your penance, the Yama wants you to think of one public figure that you despise without knowing much about him or her, find one good thing about them, and share it with the rest of us.

I would rather (and gladly) follow Crown Prince Toyosatomimi no Miko, over being in the mere company of Byakuren Hijiri. How could I possibly repent for this atrocious sin?

The Yama doesn't like to meddle in matters of religious preference. This is therefore not a sin, and you are pre-emptively absolved.

I can't seem to get into Gintama, no matter how much I try.

How much have you tried? If it's more than three episodes, then for your penance, you must watch and review Eiken. Everything else will seem like a masterpiece afterwards.

I had the chance to steal my roommate's copy of Cold Night and didn't. :ohdear:

You're repenting for ... not stealing? What kind of bizarro confession is this? It must be a very strange universe you live in. Well, far be it for the Yama to judge. Or ... well, you know what the Yama means. Anyways, for your penance, bang out a very short story about committing a minor crime to prevent a larger one that involves:

1. Batman
2. toaster waffles
3. the sentence "That's it, I'm taking back my copy of The Notebook"

I like to post in locked threads and laugh at people who can't

There is little the Yama can say to argue against this - it does sound like great fun, for one.

Did you just unlock the thread?

The Yama is starting to wonder if you ask easily-answerable or obvious questions just to annoy other people. Your avatar must now be Linda Evans.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: helvetica on November 30, 2012, 05:01:35 PM
There is little the Yama can say to argue against this - it does sound like great fun, for one.
Oh I wasn't confessing I just wanted to say how awesome I am BV
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on November 30, 2012, 05:03:05 PM
Oh I wasn't confessing I just wanted to say how awesome I am BV

The Yama is honored you would make your presence known again via this thread.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: [Y]oukai [J]esus on November 30, 2012, 05:11:41 PM
YAMA SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG

but I did what I could under the problems I had and got my NaNoWriMo word count to 42k and updated my RP
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: theshirn on November 30, 2012, 06:23:23 PM
You're repenting for ... not stealing? What kind of bizarro confession is this? It must be a very strange universe you live in. Well, far be it for the Yama to judge. Or ... well, you know what the Yama means. Anyways, for your penance, bang out a very short story about committing a minor crime to prevent a larger one that involves:

1. Batman
2. toaster waffles
3. the sentence "That's it, I'm taking back my copy of The Notebook"
This is a new Dresden Files book.  Not obtaining it is definitively a sin.  Anyway.
Quote
The clown grinned at me over the barrel of the gun.  "Your choice, kiddo.  You get in there and get something...or your girl here gets something else."  He gestured with the gun, as if there was any doubt what he meant.  "Clock's ticking."

I stumbled backwards in terror, through the automatic doors and into the well-lit, spacious, cheery interior of the local supermarket.  Sweat poured down my face and my breath tore raggedly in my chest.  There was a murderer, a god damned murderer in clown paint holding a gun to my girlfriend's head.  I couldn't think past the terror.  God, what if something happened to Katie?  What if he shot her?

No.  No.  I had to focus.  Had to do as he asked.  I couldn't even begin to wonder what motivated a man like that, what could possibly make someone hold an innocent girl for the ransom of watching someone else shoplift.  What kind of cruel madness could possess someone to get their kicks like that?

In a daze, I shuffled over to the frozen goods aisle.  I tried to act inconspicuous but it was so obvious, everyone had to be staring right at me, waiting for me to make a move.  Looking over my shoulders, I slid open the freezer door and grabbed the first thing that came to my hand, which turned out to be a package of toaster waffles.  Clutching them to me, I slowly walked over to the sliding doors, took a deep breath, and dashed out.  An alarm sounded but I was gone, gone and running around the corner to where the clown stood, still holding a gun on Katie and saying something about smiling.  "Here, here's your damned crime, just let her go!"

The man turned and grinned.  "Well, whaddya know?  I didn't think you had it in you, chump!"  He lowered his gun and took the box.  "Aunt Jemima, my favorite!  Awww, you shouldn't have!"  His voice dropped sardonically.  "No, you really shouldn't, you dirty criminal, you."  He giggled.  "Thanks for playing, here's your-"

The nasal voice was cut off by a black blur smashing into him and knocking him off his feet.  The clown was sent sprawling but bounced up almost immediately, his manic grin only widening.  "Why, BATS!  I've been waiting for hours here!"

Batman immediately tackled him again, but my attention was focused on Katie, who slumped against the wall, shaking.  I moved over to her and gathered her into a tight embrace.  "It's okay, Katie, it's okay.  I love you, baby.  It's okay now."

"Oh god."  She whispered.  I held her tighter.

"It's okay now.  We'll be all right."  I smiled at her.  "Remember.  'Our love can take us away together.'"

She sniffed and laughed at the same time, eliciting a choked sob, and finally met my eyes.  "That's it, I'm taking back my copy of The Notebook."
man I don't even know
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: fondue on November 30, 2012, 07:15:20 PM
The Yama is starting to wonder if you ask easily-answerable or obvious questions just to annoy other people. Your avatar must now be Linda Evans.
but i didn't know
:c
Fine no arguing with Enma-sama.

e: Just realised now. Punishment should be keeping this avatar for another 3 days.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Ikari on December 01, 2012, 03:00:17 AM
Alright, after my horrible way of repenting, I decided to confess another sin, because I am sorry for not putting enough effort in my last repentance. (I wasn't trying to half-ass it...)

I often make fun of my friend for his lack of talent in French and English class, while he makes fun of me for being crappy in Math. I often go too far in my teasing and I'm pretty sure I hurt him a few times.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Hinacle on December 01, 2012, 03:23:02 AM
Oh dear, the sin of prejudice! That is a doozy. For your penance, the Yama wants you to think of one public figure that you despise without knowing much about him or her, find one good thing about them, and share it with the rest of us.

I chose Lady Gaga because she was the first to come to mind. I did my research and it turns out that she has done some stuff.

Quote
Gaga also contributes in the fight against HIV and AIDS, focusing on educating young women about the risks of the disease. In collaboration with Cyndi Lauper, Gaga joined forces with MAC Cosmetics to launch a line of lipstick under their supplementary cosmetic line, Viva Glam. Titled Viva Glam Gaga and Viva Glam Cyndi for each contributor respectively, all net proceeds of the lipstick line were donated to the cosmetic company's campaign to prevent HIV and AIDS worldwide. In a press release, Gaga declared, "I don't want Viva Glam to be just a lipstick you buy to help a cause. I want it to be a reminder when you go out at night to put a condom in your purse right next to your lipstick." The sales of Gaga-endorsed Viva Glam lipstick and lipgloss have raised more than $202 million to fight HIV and AIDS.

This is pretty touching considering I had a sister that had HIV and I have a niece that has it too.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Nobu on December 01, 2012, 04:19:16 AM
I'm a terrible procrastinator that has a hard time keeping attention on one task for extended periods of time. :ohdear:

Also i'm a huge stoner Partaker of the Miracle Soma but that's honestly pretty unrelated to the above.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: fondue on December 01, 2012, 11:12:13 AM
Color the Yama surprised. What more fitting penance for attention whoring than compelled attention whoring? For your penance, you must fire up the Touhou game of your choice, and play a pacifist Lunatic run until you run out of lives, and then upload the replay file here. Do make a genuine effort to get as far as you can - the Yama can tell if you're suiciding just to get it over with.
Because of the fact I really want a Pasu head avatar, I decided to do this forgotten penance at the cost of removing my current avatar. Please tell me if it's okay.
[attach=1]
derp a herp
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on December 01, 2012, 06:36:07 PM
YAMA SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG

but I did what I could under the problems I had and got my NaNoWriMo word count to 42k and updated my RP

See what a little motivation can do? Congratulations, YJ! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

man I don't even know

The Yama shout-laughed on a couple of occasions there. Congratulations, theshim! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

I often make fun of my friend for his lack of talent in French and English class, while he makes fun of me for being crappy in Math. I often go too far in my teasing and I'm pretty sure I hurt him a few times.

We more easily cross the lines with friends than with acquaintances, as we're more at ease around them. For your penance, you must do some surprising and awesome thing for your friend, posting evidence of such in this thread.


My heart goes out to you, Hinacle. That can't be easy. I'd say you not only repenting for your last sin, but have pre-emptively absolved yourself from your next one, too. Congratulations, Hinacle! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

I'm a terrible procrastinator that has a hard time keeping attention on one task for extended periods of time. :ohdear:

Also i'm a huge stoner Partaker of the Miracle Soma but that's honestly pretty unrelated to the above.

The Yama can relate to both of these "sins", intimately. So let's start with the former: for your penance, draw a visual form - either symbolic, realistic or both - that to you evokes feelings of motivation, and post it here.

With regards to the latter, the Yama happens to think this is often totally medicinal and not really a sin as such, in moderation. The "moderation" part being the important bit, of course. Do you think your partakinage has gone beyond the level of "moderation"?

Because of the fact I really want a Pasu head avatar, I decided to do this forgotten penance at the cost of removing my current avatar. Please tell me if it's okay.
derp a herp

Now that was entertaining. Congratulations, fonduemaster! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: PX on December 01, 2012, 06:51:37 PM
I love AKB48. Help.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on December 01, 2012, 07:04:30 PM
I love AKB48. Help.

There is no escape but death. :getdown:
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: fondue on December 01, 2012, 07:15:19 PM
you're the best yama ever
don't quit your job
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on December 01, 2012, 08:13:57 PM
I love AKB48. Help.

The Yama can appreciate female entertainers, and even female entertainers who are sold to their fanbase strictly for their sex appeal, but you must know that AKB48 takes this to a whole new level. For your penance, you must read this article (http://isseicreekphilosophy.wordpress.com/2011/07/02/akb48-the-paramount-example-of-sexism-in-the-world-of-1984/) and post a cogent response, whether you agree or disagree.



IHNN edit: I wanted to edit someone else's post to actually be able to use the IM ability.  I didn't do it until now though, but the thing is I still did it.  What do?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: I have no name on December 01, 2012, 08:24:46 PM
DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A BOIL OR A PIMPLE TO YOU?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Stuffman on December 01, 2012, 08:36:21 PM
I have developed an almost fetishistic enjoyment of failure and have never completed a single personal project I've started. Why does quitting feel so good? Please help me, yama!
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on December 01, 2012, 08:37:48 PM
I have developed an almost fetishistic enjoyment of failure and have never completed a single personal project I've started. Why does quitting feel so good? Please help me, yama!

In all seriousness I suspect you fear you will sputter out somewhere down the line and figure it hurts less to say you quit instead of crash and burn.

That much said, I will let the Yama comment.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: JT on December 02, 2012, 01:50:43 AM
this article (http://isseicreekphilosophy.wordpress.com/2011/07/02/akb48-the-paramount-example-of-sexism-in-the-world-of-1984/)
I don't even like AKB48, but I don't think it's physically possible to roll one's eyes at this any harder than I am right now. "You kids and your damn skimpy outfits and flirty music! It's just about SEX! WHERE IS THE SUBSTANCE???" Oh my God! People like their pop stars to be young and sexy, how awful! Give me a fucking break.

Quote
All of this reminds me exactly of politics. It doesn?t matter if you have talent or ability, what matters is solely and purely PR. As far as I am concerned, this group does not have to present themselves as singers, but farmers or even jugglers. It would make the least difference. Besides, what proper production management in artists decide who is to sing on stage by fans? votes, completely ignoring the individual?s ability to sing?
Let me spell it out for you, Captain Feminist Liberator: Singing and dancing are part of the appeal, because those things are sexy. Farming and juggling aren't.

I really resent the implication that this is rooted in some kind of patriarchal desire to subjugate women. Boy bands and male pop singers are NEVER vacuous sex objects, am I right ladies?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on December 02, 2012, 04:25:25 AM
DEFEND THE WATAS OR SUFFER ETERNALLY

Challenge accepted.



Quote from: Tenguyama
1. Why the Watatsukis are actually not Mary Sues, but have relatable flaws and imperfections

Yorihime can pretty visibly crush anyone in the series in a straight fight---she can dissolve and reassemble matter, create miniature stars, and deflect a Master Spark with little but her sword. Naturally she apparently places a huge amount of pride on her combat skills---she had Reimu, Marisa, Remi and Sakuya trapped with her abilities and could have diced them at her leisure, but when our heroines explained the concept of spell card duels to her, she released them and fought them one at a time, presumably not wanting to turn down a chance to beat the dissolute Earth-dwellers at their own game. It stands to reason that our heroines may have only kept their heads because of Yorihime not being able to turn down a good fight.

In the political arena? Yorihime isn't invincible. Are the charges leveled at her simple misunderstanding and caution, or someone conveniently trying to get Yorihime out of the way? Either way, she realizes that something is amiss and that she needs two heads to solve this problem, so she keeps Reimu with her at the Lunar capital for an extended visit---ostensibly because Reimu was walking proof that Yorihime wasn't the only one who could channel divine power, but also because it's possible Yorihime wanted a second person to be in-the-know and on her side. Why else would she have let Reimu go back home unharmed after taking her there, besides possibly some grudging respect for the only human in the rocket group to give her any worry? Who's to say Yori didn't bring her to the Moon to confide something with Reimu she couldn't share with anything else? Nobody would worry about a stupid, dumb, short-lived, short-sighted human being able to remember any details, right?

Also, Reisen II was in a pickle for heading to Earth and Yorihime went out of her way to "pardon" Reisen II's crime. As she also is the sister responsible for training the rest of the moon rabbits, she apparently has at least some sort of soft spot for her troops.

I imagine that also has something to do with the blame laid on Yorihime---for a bunch of folks obsessed with purity, Lunarians can fight really, really dirty.

As for Toyohime---she brags about being able to wield a weapon capable of casually levelling the entire Bamboo Forest, and seems to care little about the possibility of mass casualties amongst youkai and other creatures living in the Bamboo Forest, and furthermore considers the earth-dwellers to be subhuman scum by virtue of nothing more than being born mortal.

That is not the mindset of a smug jerk---that is the mindset of a certifiable psychopath.

Also, she doesn't personally tend to the moon rabbit troopers like her sister, though she has a soft spot for Reisen and Reisen II---I suspect Yorihime's is more genuine concern whereas Toyo thinks of them as pets, though. Which raises some disturbing questions as how well she empathizes with others.

Quote from: Tenguyama
2. Why Toyo in particular actually has a personality beyond "boy do I love peaches".

Let me talk to you about peaches.

It's been said that both the Watas are married, and to men at that.

Has it ever been said that Toyo is HAPPY with her marriage?

These people can and will live effectively forever barring death by disease, gunshot, blunt force, drowning, etc. So why would they need such formal marriage arrangements?

Simple. New DNA is needed. Even if they have cloning of some sorts (possible origin of moon rabbits? Must investigate further) they've gotta get new DNA SOMEhow, and the easiest way is the one already in place---nature. How far did YOU think the Moon Nazi jokes were going to go?

My theory is that Toyo is not happy with her marriage because she swings that way, and the rest of the Moon cannot take that for an answer.

So how does she vent? Peaches. Peaches here, peaches there, peaches everywhere. We all know what peaches are used as a metaphor for sometimes, right? And no one catches on because peaches already have a cleaner, more mundane connotation in Asian-derived cultures.

Also, part of her job involves maintaining the boundary between the scientific, airless-ball-of-rock moon and the whimsical, mythological moon. Presumably without her they would be in some danger of suddenly suffocating within minutes and dying a horrible death.

One imagines she would feel kinda sorta maybe a little bit under pressure for this.

With all THAT in mind, her comparatively callous attitude takes on a different, more tragic dimension.

Danmaku. Danmaku never changes.

~Fin



That was tiring as Hell and depressing as fuck to write. I'mma shower and sleep now.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Jana on December 02, 2012, 07:12:20 AM
Also i'm a huge stoner Partaker of the Miracle Soma but that's honestly pretty unrelated to the above.

I am no Yama, but Jana demands you take a long, warm shower and brush your teeth thoroughly!
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Oldmansour on December 02, 2012, 07:34:13 AM
I love AKB48. Help.

Is it likewise a sin to have enjoyed AKB0048 the anime?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Nobu on December 02, 2012, 07:45:32 AM
The Yama can relate to both of these "sins", intimately. So let's start with the former: for your penance, draw a visual form - either symbolic, realistic or both - that to you evokes feelings of motivation, and post it here.

With regards to the latter, the Yama happens to think this is often totally medicinal and not really a sin as such, in moderation. The "moderation" part being the important bit, of course. Do you think your partakinage has gone beyond the level of "moderation"?

I'll do the former as soon as possible, and as for the latter I do believe that I do things in moderation. It's an ever negotiated balance between all the lives that i'm pulled between, and how each lifestyle facilitates the other. My stoner persona is readily integrated into my regular self and I think of it as having gained the permanent buff "Inflappable" due to what i've learned from weed. I'm proud of who I am and all the steps that it took to bring me here.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: PX on December 02, 2012, 09:26:16 AM
Is it likewise a sin to have enjoyed AKB0048 the anime?

Nonsense, the anime was fun and better than any right it had to be from being an AKB commercial. It's what got me into them in the first place. Anyways, I'll get the post out tomorrow.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Oldmansour on December 02, 2012, 09:57:33 AM
I just hope the next season tones down the CG. I realize the show was probably made on a Dr. Who budget, but really.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on December 02, 2012, 02:03:39 PM
I have developed an almost fetishistic enjoyment of failure and have never completed a single personal project I've started. Why does quitting feel so good? Please help me, yama!

Does it feel better than finishing a project? We may need to explore this further. For your penance, show us Motivation-tan and Slacker-tan fighting over your conscious, a la the little Tom Angel and little Tom Devil that appear on the same-named cat's shoulders whenever he's having some moral conflict involving Jerry. Preferably in comic format.


PX don't read this unless you're a cheating cheater-head cheater:
I agree the article builds its argument poorly by coming from the sex-shaming angle, which is like, the exact opposite of what late-20th century feminism was about. What I would have liked to have seen explored further are the legal entanglements these girls get into; namely, how much control over their personal lives they sign away, probably without really knowing the full implications of their own contracts, being as young as they are and probably not possessing law degrees. That, to me, is dehumanizing and exploitative. And don't even get me started on the Japanese girls they fly into North American cons to hand out bishoujou games; girls who while probably used to having otaku leer at them, are now being leered at additionally by virtue of their ethnicity, which I think is cultural exploitation. The industry that feeds this machine exploits men and women alike; it is just very adept at using sex appeal to serve as a catalyst for other forms of exploitation - it's not the sex appeal that's wrong, it's just the carrot under the trap net.

Challenge accepted.

So, part 1 is "she's a psychopath and therefore not a Mary Sue" and the second one speculates on Toyo's wedded life? As shaky as this is, you did complete your penance. Congratulations, Alliterator! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

I'll do the former as soon as possible, and as for the latter I do believe that I do things in moderation. It's an ever negotiated balance between all the lives that i'm pulled between, and how each lifestyle facilitates the other. My stoner persona is readily integrated into my regular self and I think of it as having gained the permanent buff "Inflappable" due to what i've learned from weed. I'm proud of who I am and all the steps that it took to bring me here.

The Yama can relate, and this sounds like a healthy approach to Soma, therefore your consumption is not a sin and you are pre-emptively absolved.

Quote
random AKB48 chatter

SILENCE! The Yama can't think over the sound of millions of otaku sweat glands squeezing at the same time.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on December 02, 2012, 03:15:28 PM
So, part 1 is "she's a psychopath and therefore not a Mary Sue" and the second one speculates on Toyo's wedded life? As shaky as this is, you did complete your penance. Congratulations, Alliterator! You have successfully repented for your sin, and have been absolved. Go forth now, with a pure heart, into Paradise.

More like "Things are worse on the Moon than us fans are officially privy to so far and she's cracking under the strain while acting innocent on the outside", but whatevs.

Now to work on the Walfas megameme comic...
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on December 02, 2012, 03:43:14 PM
More like "Things are worse on the Moon than us fans are officially privy to so"

"so this is all pure speculation", in other words, yes. Speculation doesn't exactly count, as the Yama asked for canon sources to back you up, but yeah, it passes.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: AnonymousPondScum on December 02, 2012, 03:45:33 PM
"so this is all pure speculation", in other words, yes. Speculation doesn't exactly count, as the Yama asked for canon sources to back you up, but yeah, it passes.

Ugh. Well, I tried. Would it help if I listed relevant page numbers? I had SSiB and the wiki open while writing that.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on December 02, 2012, 05:24:52 PM
Penance is served. Any additional effort is unnecessary.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: pasu on December 02, 2012, 06:29:34 PM
O Yama I have sinned once again

I raised an army of headswait that's not a sin; er, I was supposed to work on a secret santa gift and study for my mid-sem tests which are next week but I totally wasted the whole weekend sleeping and playing DoTS
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Aromeia on December 03, 2012, 01:11:01 PM
I have received a box of Shikieiki Yamaxanadu Valentine Chocolates from a friend in Japan, but I totally forgot about it until last month. Am I a bad person for forgetting about my love for the yama?

Moreover, does this even qualify as a sin?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Hawkpath1337 on December 05, 2012, 02:47:34 AM
Kingdom Hearts
-Did take the idea of the crazy cutscene battle to a new level.
-Does have some nice graphics for its era.
-Does have some alright music.
-Has a plot that is interesting enough to draw people in despite the initial WTF nature of its premise

THIS IS HARD

-Probably helped bring attention to some older FF characters who need more love.
*gasp* HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE KINGDOM HEARTS!? HOW!?
Oh, uh... I balanced an egg on my head and then proceeded to cheese the make on the verb in the noun.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on December 05, 2012, 05:48:07 PM
O Yama I have sinned once again

I raised an army of headswait that's not a sin; er, I was supposed to work on a secret santa gift and study for my mid-sem tests which are next week but I totally wasted the whole weekend sleeping and playing DoTS

I have received a box of Shikieiki Yamaxanadu Valentine Chocolates from a friend in Japan, but I totally forgot about it until last month. Am I a bad person for forgetting about my love for the yama?

Moreover, does this even qualify as a sin?

Sounds like you're both guilty of the same sin. And you posted right after one another. Guess what? It's time for a PENANCE CHALLENGE.

Go download this free game (http://redrogue.net/). It's cross-platform - there's even a Linux version for the Yama that runs perfectly. The controls are way simple. You are to each make an attempt at this game, going as far as you can. When satisfied, post a screenshot of your high scores. The one with the highest score will be absolved. The one with the lower score shall receive additional penance.

*gasp* HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE KINGDOM HEARTS!? HOW!?
Oh, uh... I balanced an egg on my head and then proceeded to cheese the make on the verb in the noun.

Your posts are spammy and are clearly just being made to get your required 10 to get an avatar. Well, you want an avatar? Fine - here's your avatar (http://i47.tinypic.com/rsubzq.jpg) for the next two weeks. Be sure to read the Rules Board about image size guidelines (and everything else).

Welcome!
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: theshirn on December 05, 2012, 06:39:30 PM
I keep pushing off this job application because while I really want the job I don't think I'm qualified or have anything to show for myself and I have no idea how to change that.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: nintendonut888 on December 05, 2012, 06:59:37 PM
I have just said something that may very well hurt someone I hold close to my heart. What should I do?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: theshirn on February 19, 2013, 09:28:59 PM
Forgive me Yama for I have sinned; I have bumped a two-month-old thread.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on February 19, 2013, 09:33:21 PM
The Yama was hoping this thread would die as she was running out of ideas for penance.

You must type with boxing gloves for the next ten days.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Edible on February 19, 2013, 09:52:43 PM
Forgive me, Yama, for I have sinned.  I have locked an old as fuck topic so only mods and janitors and stuff can post in it.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: helvetica on February 19, 2013, 10:30:37 PM
I'm not capable of sinning, just capable of being awesome
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on February 19, 2013, 10:34:30 PM
What is sin, really, anyway?

*takes long draw off of pipe, looking out the window pensively*
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Rin Kagamine on February 20, 2013, 11:25:33 PM
Sup doods?
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: PX on February 26, 2013, 11:14:15 PM
Forgive me, for I have unlocked the thread to respond to a task given to me 3 months ago.

The Yama can appreciate female entertainers, and even female entertainers who are sold to their fanbase strictly for their sex appeal, but you must know that AKB48 takes this to a whole new level. For your penance, you must read this article (http://isseicreekphilosophy.wordpress.com/2011/07/02/akb48-the-paramount-example-of-sexism-in-the-world-of-1984/) and post a cogent response, whether you agree or disagree.

First off, this article. For starters, this quote
Quote
I believe this is imperative that somebody wrote about them in the intellectual arena so as to keep the dialogues and discussions alive.
just gives off the air of him being a pompous ass who believes that he is greater than us for we are babbling idiots. Second, looking through his website, he has written multiple articles about AKB48, coming off as pure blind hate at this point. Third, this article is full of both poor research and constant cherry picking for the sake of trying to make his point. And lastly, the article in question goes off in so many blind tangents that I lost track of what it was trying to say, so I don't know where to start.

So where to start? I'll just start off with AKB48. What is Akihabara48? First off, to understand it, you should read up on this brilliantly written article on Japanese Idols (http://newschoolkaidan.com/daes-idol-101/), as it's very informative and subjective. Now then, here's where the article goes wrong. Right off the bat, it presents them as a "singer group", when they are in fact, an Idol group. So let's start over, what IS AKB48? It's an Idol group that was created back in 2005 by Akimoto Yasushi, a very renowned person in the Japanese entertainment industry. Contrary to it's name, it currently has 88 members, but when combined with the research students and sister groups around the country and in other countries in Asia, the tally totals over THREE HUNDRED. The group began back in 2005 with the idea of a group that regularly performed in their own theater instead of occasionally appearing in concerts and television, allowing fans to go see the girls live. The article states that the achievement of the group belongs to only Aki-P, with none of it going to the girls. Well this is just shitting on the efforts and hardships the girls went through. In it's first auditions, there were nearly 8000 applications, of which only 45 of them were accepted to auditions, of which only Twenty Four girls passed. You'd think that since they're a group that only consists of "cute, young girls", it'd be popular, however, after a month of rigorous training, the girls had their opening performance.... to a crowd of SEVEN customers. Yet despite this, they went through the concert with smiles on their faces, and fter the concert, the girls went on to the streets and handed out flyers themselves. Most people expected the group to fail immediately.

On to the next paragraph.
Quote
The reasons for its popularity may be dependent on many elements, however, as is always the case with Japanese pop singers, its primary reasons may be that the group only consists of ?cute, young girls? and that the promotion videos and lyrics of the songs are flirtatious at best. The reason why they have sold so many CDs thus contributing to its gaining popularity is primarily because when you buy a CD they give you a voting ticket.

This is completely false. First off, on the point that they consist of only "cute, young girls", then why did they accept Ohori Megumi, who passed auditions at the age of TWENTY TWO, well past the prime of a "cute, young" idol. The fans asked Aki-P to allow Shinoda Mariko into the group, and he did on the condition that she learned all the dances in four days. Mariko, who had failed the first audition, has always been in the top 5 in terms of popularity for all of AKB. The previous "face of AKB", Maeda Atsuko, was passed not because she was cute, or had talent, but because "she had a good smile." The General Director of AKB48 and all sister groups, Takahashi Minami, was in the final 15 of the 30th HoriPro Talent Contest, out of 52,547 contestants, and yet the only reason she passed the first auditions was simply "because her birthday and height have 48 in it."

"Promotion videos and lyrics flirtatious at best?" Ha! More on this later.

As for the voting ticket, that is only for ONE SINGLE PER YEAR, not year round. Only one single is determined by the fans. As for the handshake events, it's so that the fans who can't attend the concerts and lives are given a chance to not only see their idols up close, but to meet them and exchange words. It allows the fans to get to know the girls. Also, the 5500 cd guy was found to be a hoax, as the guy was actually a Chinese retailer.

Quote
Their songs and lyrics are no better ? any messages? No, not at all. The only messages those songs may contain are sexual appeal and flirtations.
Absolute bollocks. Amazing, is how he goes all the way back to their fourth single to try and get his point while completely ignoring all the other songs. All 200+ of them. He brings up Everyday, Katyusha's music video, containing girls dancing on the beach in bikinis. It's a SUMMER SONG. The song and video are completely in tune with the theme and time. Seifuku ga jama wo suru (http://stage48.net/studio48/seifukugajamawosuru_single.html)? Aki-P has stated that his lyrics are meant to "depict reality" and to provoke listeners to think about difficult issues. Heavy Rotation's music video? Straight from wikipedia:
Quote
The director of the music video Mika Ninagawa (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mika_Ninagawa) explained she wanted to appeal to both men and women by creating a creative and fun video, due to the group's rising popularity among girls.[115][116] (http://forum.nihongogo.com/topic/12133-the-truth-behind-heavy-rotation/)
While we're on the topic, you'd think the fans of AKB are mostly middle aged men? Well, think again.
(http://i297.photobucket.com/albums/mm203/PX_Timefordeath/8B421EFD-7416-4BA1-860C-CD4EE671EF70-62800-0000354D474B355E.jpg)
The demographic of AKB48 is... everybody.
As for their songs having no message, off the top of my head I can name plenty more than he listed. Ignoring songs that came out after the article:
Now, for the rules about love. First off, you have to understand. Idols are PRODUCTS, and there are standards for them in the Japanese society. Idols are not allowed to date, drink, smoke, etc. They are being sold as an image, and they need to uphold that image. In terms of the rules against love, ALL IDOLS HAVE THIS RULE, not just AKB. In fact, AKB is far more lenient on these rules than most others. I, myself, find the rules stupid, but I can understand why it stands and accept it. I compare it towards the World Wrestling Entertainment company. For the WWE, you are given a character, and one of the biggest rules is to not break kayfabe. No matter what, you can never break character. If the WWE says that you can't drink, then you can't drink. Period. Doing so will get you fired instantly, and you are replaceable. The same things apply to idols, and while it's a sad truth, it's still business.

Quote
All of this reminds me exactly of politics. It doesn?t matter if you have talent or ability, what matters is solely and purely PR. As far as I am concerned, this group does not have to present themselves as singers, but farmers or even jugglers. It would make the least difference. Besides, what proper production management in artists decide who is to sing on stage by fans? votes, completely ignoring the individual?s ability to sing? What is more surprising is the fact that last year, in 2010, they once ignored the voting system and decided who to sing on record by ?rock-paper-scissors.?
Nonsense, absolute nonsense. Otherwise, why aren't farmers around the country getting world wide recognition? As for not having talent or ability, idols are still incomplete. They are always in training, striving to get to the point where they can graduate from being idols into the entertainment industry. Being an idol is meant to be a stepping stone into your dreams. And the rock-paper-scissors tournament is a genius idea, since their singles would only lead to having the same 16 girls all the time, the janken tournament allows all girls a chance to make a name for themselves and get more fans. As for signing their rights away, that is all false. They are not forced to do everything they do. They can just simply walk away from the group. Many girls from AKB have done it and continued to have successful careers, it's as simple as walking out.

How did I get into AKB? It all started when I decided to watch AKB0048, expecting it to be shit. I fell in love. I actually liked the music in the anime. After lurking some /a/ threads, I decided to learn more about the group, so I started watching past episodes of their show AKBINGO!. I got to learn about the girls, their personalities, their quirks, and the stuff they went through. Many of these girls went through hardships. One I spoke of earlier, Ohori Megumi, had a solo release on the condition that if she didn't sell 10,000 CDs in a month, then she would be forced to leave the group. She spent the next two months going around the country advertising her CD herself, with almost no budget at all, immediately after the only person who supported her, her grandmother, died. In the span of those two months, her parents actually disowned her. All her friends from AKB helped supported her, and on the last day of the deadline had managed to sell over 2,000 CDs to barely break the goal of 10k CDs and stay in AKB. I started to care for the girls, for they had passion and endured things just to be able to move towards their dreams. To be honest, I couldn't give less of a crap about the newer girls, for they never had to go through any hardships to achieve fame.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Tengukami on February 26, 2013, 11:21:03 PM
That's a very thoughtful and well-organized response. It's clear you spent considerable time and energy in formulating your argument and presenting it. Even the generous use of Drama Bold is forgivable. While I might not agree with a great deal of what you've said, you definitely deserve credit for a cogent response.

But please don't unlock staff-locked threads. Locked again.
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: Rin Kagamine on February 27, 2013, 02:42:20 AM
lol lookit all those words no one will read
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: helvetica on February 27, 2013, 07:27:41 AM
Forgive me Father for I have sinned.
I gave too much of a shit today and actually felt sympathy for PX.

But then it passed the end,
Title: Re: Time To Atone For Your Sins, MotK
Post by: PX on February 27, 2013, 07:48:55 AM
lol lookit all those words no one will read

tl;dr

my opinions = yours

:smug: